Home Field Advantage

♪♪ Hello and welcome to Go, my favorite sports team. We are not being held hostage. We do not have anyone that is making us read a list of demands. We do not have anyone slightly off camera if you're watching on Spotify. We are f***ing. We are fine. I'm in the studio. I'm f***ing designing the studio to wait. We'll bleep that out. ♪♪ We are here once again to learn more about the world of sport and the average of the gap between sports-nowers and sports-not-nowers and or haters. If you're out there and you're watching this or listening, whatever you're doing, you either like sports or you don't like sports. And I imagine there might be less people that don't like sports-watching this because either you're slowly being converted or statistically speaking, if you're not interested in sports, this might not go up in your recommendations, which is why you sport-nowers need to give it over to the not sport-nowers people because then they do. This is not the list of demands. I do not have a gun pointed at me right now. I want to be very clear about that. Yeah, yeah. And there's nobody behind the curtain that feeds us lines that we have to say specifically about the merch that you can totally go by at store.gmft.com. There's a finger that you can also potentially use for pointing at things. Right. Pointing at things. Not eating. We do not recommend eating. It is not made of edible material that is made for human consumption. That is not true. That is true. It's not edible. I'm confusing myself. Also, we have pins and they're not used for stabbing. They're used for accessorizing. I'm not listening to you anymore. We are here to talk about sports. I don't know sports, but Tyler does. Why? Why do I know sports? Because I have a master's degree. Oh, okay. I have a master's degree in sport administration. I almost got a second master degree in exercise physiology. I studied the ins and outs of sport. I became a master of balls and holes. The king perhaps of balls and holes, you might say. All right. Cool. I don't know if that's an official title, but what are we learning about today? Today, we are talking about what everybody knows and has experienced in their own life in some capacity. Home team advantage or home field advantage. All right. Well, everyone knows it. Thank you so much for attending the sepsis. No way to go home. They've experienced it. That doesn't mean they know it more. Well, okay. All right. What do they know? What do they not know? I mean, they probably know that fans affect the game. You know, you can energize your team. You can cause the other team to have penalties or false starts. We had an episode about that one. If you didn't listen to it, you should go back and listen to it apparently because I have a funny feeling that some of that information is going to spill over here. That's the fan interactions episode. It was maybe an episode or two or three or four ago. I don't remember how long ago it was. I can look it up. Well, I don't know specifically when this one will air because we might have had guests come in and have appeared before this one. It's probably up. Maybe it's not up. I have no idea. It's a mark. Yes. In your life. You have wrestled. You have lived. You have lived. You have jumped down your own stairs. Yep. I've done that. What is the advantage of being at home? For me? Yes. Not good. Apparently, if you're going by that metric of me jumping downstairs, I did that when I was at home, cracked my head open. Oh, at home. Yeah, but you got to the hospital quicker than if you were at somebody else's house probably. Which was not my home I want to point out. I got help when I was not home. So my home, they're haunted full of demons, a hellscape, no advantage to be found. Oh, yeah. I forgot. You were so poor that you had to go next door out in the cold to watch TV, right? Yeah, my home was actually out in the house. I considered the woods my home. You know, that's really what I was all about. You're up one with me. I like home. Yeah, I like home. Home's good. It's good when you're sick because then your mom can help you, right? Well, I mean, most of the time when I've been more sick, you go to the hospital, which I have to remind you of. Well, I don't know if this is a great start to the home field advantage. All right. I don't have any good illusions to this. I'm not pulling up much here. Move on. Move on. All right. How act one, how teams increase their home field advantage? Okay. Because there's the obvious, the fans, right? And how do the fans affect the game, Mark? Tell me how your fans affect your advantage at certain events. Is this a quiz? Is this what I'm supposed to remember from the last one? I want to show how you have, I want you to give an opportunity to appease your fans. I didn't actually think I would ever have been quizzed on any of this information. How have they or how would I? In close question? Sorry. I was listening to you. I didn't realize I actually had to listen to you in these. How have your fans created a home field advantage for you in life? And how would you use them to create a home field advantage for you in sport? God, I don't know. If my fans started suddenly showing up at my home, I feel like that would be a bad thing. I wouldn't have any advantage as there. No, no, no, this is your home field. It's not your home field. It's LA, like when you're at VidCon. They're all standing in my backyard just staring ominously up in my windows. So they did advantage. They shouted, advantage, advantage. I just like changed faster. I feel superior all of a sudden. God, it's like one of the weird things where I'm sorry. I'm completely counterpointing every you've had. But every time I go see a fan, it's not in my home. I go somewhere else. Look, I got nothing. I got nothing to give you. Just give me the half. Just fail me. You have an F for being a fan of yourself. I'm a fan of myself. You didn't talk about that. You're playing a sport, Mark. Okay, this is wild conjecture here. This is wild conjecture here. You're throwing in track and field. Okay, all right, sure. You're taking revenge on that coach that told you you couldn't go to the regionals or whatever. Right, right, right. And you want to show him up. How would fans help you do that? How would you seep the energy from your fans? Oh. Oh. Would you make them yellings? For me? How you go, go, Mark. Would that make you get pumped? What do I do in that situation? Do I go up to it? Because I imagine what the situation, what you're asking me is like, I go up to all my fans. I'd be like, guys, I'm really feeling discouraged. You're cheering for me really loudly. Would that go over well? I'm probably... It's like, when Jeb Bush, you know, the things like, please, clap. You know, that's the situation that you're telling me. I don't feel very inspired by this home field advantage. I don't feel... I mean, in all fairness, the most of the time when you went viral was when everybody was like, oh my God, Mark's in the hospital. Oh, yeah, no, that is true. But I didn't ask for that. I didn't make... He pooped trend on Twitter. That's what they did. I don't ask for those things. And I don't feel good about it afterwards. And he'd not remind you, I'm in the hospital. I'm not home. What do you want from me? All right, all right, all right, fair, fair, fair, fair, fair. What about the location? What about the location would give you an advantage over an opponent in any sort of sport or scenario? Give me, if my location. Okay. Yeah. So like, if you say you had to duel somebody, right? I have to duel. Do I have to duel somebody? Yes. There's somebody in the room with a gun to your head saying you have to duel. Oh, that's definitely unlikely. Very unlikely. How would you get an advantage based on location? Based on location. Okay, so... Just location alone. We're doing a duel. I'm going to make sure that there's a lot of fog, but only on my side. Fuck, but she's everywhere. Yeah, pistols it don't. The sun's going to be over my shoulder glaring right in his eyes. Also, I'm going to make sure that there's a wind machine pushing very hard from me to him, so that his bullet will curl backwards and be thrown back at him and my bullet will go double fast towards him. Alright, now think about it in sports and how teams do something similar. Did I hit on the exact thing? You hit really close with the sun like that. I hit on the thing. I would have the sun on my eye in, no, on their eye in... I would have the sun in their eyes, the wind on my side. I would have... what is fog? Fog machines! All right, fog! So the Miami Dolphins, their home sideline is in the shade when the sun is out. Their opposing team has the sun in their eyes and are in the sun, therefore they're in the heat of the day. Right! So they take advantage of the cool area for their team to stay cool and rested while the other team is sweating and having basically more sweat come out so it creates greater exhaustion. So they're blinding their team in a way but only based off more of heat. Well, they just got to get portable air conditioners, but you know... Look, I'm smart enough that if I go to another person's team, I would be able to solve these problems, but sports people are very dumb as we know. Right? They're right? No. We are very smart. I'm very smart. My brain is big. Our collective opinion is what Go My Favorite Sports team represents for the whole world. And we say sport people are dumb. They're smart, therefore with both of our opinions, combine their average. They're very average. Yeah, I think we might be right about that. I think we might be right. Okay, so they use the weather to their advantage is what the end result of that is. Yeah, and they can do that via altitude like Mile High Stadium and you have to deal with the advantageous of being acclimated to elevation. And they'll also do it in ways like, you know, colder weather, heaters, the amount of heaters that are available. Some sports require a certain amount of amenities available to the opposing team, but they can use the elements to their advantage. If they know the weather's coming, they're more prepared. Say you got to choose who you're going against. How would you use like potential travel that they'd have to be fatigued from? Time zones, jet lag, home field advantage. Okay, well, I mean, that just comes down to picking your opponents, right? People know they're going to be going to New York for certain things in LA, right? You can't really pick that, but it is. I do see what you're getting at. Yeah. So those are general advantages that they'll do intentionally and sometimes unintentionally because if you're in Denver, the altitude is, you build your stadium in Denver. That wasn't an intentional decision. They were just based in Denver and it ended up being an advantage. But the Dolphins definitely intentionally put their opposing team in the sun. Yeah, that is a dick move and very probably very much like all those Miamians are. They're just a bunch of dicks, right? That's what we believe we have this podcast believe everyone in Miami is a giant dick. There's a dolphins. Is a dolphin a dick shaped animal? Depends on the dick, I suppose. But I'm going metaphorical. Florida, Florida people are crazy. There's all the Florida man jokes. Exactly. Have you ever looked up on your birthday what Florida man headline was? Can you look up? Wait, hold on. Yeah, if you look, just just look up your birthday and type Florida man. Okay, Florida man, June 28. All right, Florida man. Florida man birthday challenge. Okay, a person was said to have stopped on the hood of a car on the Florida highway. A man was infuriated when he saw the hood of a car traveling on South Florida Interstate 95 being caught. Junior Francis said it all started at his ex-girlfriend's house after a Mercedes wasn't this. This article is not written right. You're supposed to just the headline, not the whole article. Junior Francis said it all started at his ex-girlfriend's house after a Mercedes wasn't shared. According to Francis, the couple's really super complicated and they took the car and drove it off. Grab the hood of the car. But anyway, someone knows on the hood of a car on the on the middle of the highway on my birthday. All right, you ready for mine? Yeah. Infamous Florida Easter Bunny arrested after hit and run. I also have Florida man arrested at Waffle House after overbacon. Oh, oh God. All right. Florida man known as the monkey whisper arrested. That's pretty good. That's what we think of Florida is. We just we meme on Florida man. We collectively have agreed that it is terrible in Miami. All right, Mark, I have a project for you. Okay. There's multiple other ways that teams can take advantage purposefully to have a home field advantage. Okay. One of them is locker rooms. So I want you to do do a nice Google search of what a home to a home locker room looks like and what a visitors locker room looks like. Home. What do you do that? I mean, it's how you how Iowa painted their visitors locker room pink because the Iowa hot guys think pink is a calming color and it makes their opponents less likely to hit them hard and come onto the field really invigorated and adrenaline searched. I am you were saying too many things at once. I got confused. What did you say Google a home locker room? I did that. Okay. I've done that. And then you Google visitor locker room. Do I not look at what I'm doing? You will. I want you to describe. I'm giving you both. And then I want you to describe the home locker rooms that you see. And then I want you to describe the visitor locker rooms. Okay. We got a locker room. There's lockers. Like how? What are the reasons I described? There's a lot of lockers. Sometimes there's pillars to support a ceiling. Mark, what are the amenities look like? There's lockers. What do you want? I see some of the showers. There's TVs. There's TVs. There's the fancy home locker rooms. Yeah. Okay. I see because when I looked up home team locker room, it was just high school locker rooms. I think it's like, you didn't give me any specifics. Now look at it like the Jack Lard's locker room. Okay. That is very nice. Oh, very elegant. That is, that is wonderful. A $28 million locker room for LSU. Yep. What the hell? Why is that so? It's, it's very nice. It's probably got like hot and cooling tubs. The training room. It's got masseuses and massage tables. Oh my God. You know, everything you could possibly hope for and need lounged rooms with video games and comfortable chairs, massage chairs. It's roomy. It's spacious. Okay. I honestly didn't know what you were getting at when you first did this, but now that I'm seeing like the actual, what I should have done is NFL home team locker room. Okay. So everyone. You should have done NCAA home team locker rooms because that's the really ones that are be disparaging because then I fell the locker rooms for home and away are pretty similar per NFL rules. Okay. Okay. I see, I see, I see. Okay. Well, they're very nice. They have nice chairs. They got a lot of stuff going on here. Okay. So NCAA away team locker room. So it looks like a prison. Ah, man. That the fail room. There's a place called the fail room. Yep. In Alabama, the away locker room at Alabama is named the fail room. Oh, I see the pink one. You said pink there before that is Iowa Hawkeyes one. Yep. Wow. That is very pink visiting locker rooms in college football. But all aren't nice for a reason. This one really looks like some of these look incredibly depressing. Like they're they look like a just a standard office building decorum with white walls, gray floor, gray ceiling, gray lockers. It's quite drab. It's a little depressing. Do you think if you have to spend and usually you're in a locker room before a game for hours, like two to three hours at most? How much different comfort level is for the home team versus the away team? I imagine it's extraordinary. And the reason being we don't want them to get too comfortable and therefore we will be better. Yeah, you'll be more relaxed. But why pink? Pink doesn't make any sense. Apparently it's supposed to be a calming color. It's a calming effect so that when it comes to football, you want to come out with aggression. Wait, then why give the home team all these comforts? Wait a minute, this is this doesn't make any sense. Wait, if you think about it, this doesn't make any sense. If the objective of painting the away team is to calm them down and make them relax, why not give them the more comfortable thing that way they will be not aggressive? Why not make the home team one where their chairs are spikes, you know, one like a triangle shape that you can't sit down comfortably? Why not have the massage chair just be needles jabbing into your arms and legs? If you want to release the animal, why would why have video games to relax with? That's not getting in the game of the mind. They got it backwards. The coaches turn it turn them off, man. You got room. You can conglomerate. You can you can do whatever you need to focus up. You got the bright colors. You got the comforts. And then when you go out on the field after you've been in air conditioning, you can then get really hype. But if you're cramped and in an office type building, it's dreary and you hate life and then you go out in the field and it's like, I hate everything. I'm very uncomfortable. My muscles hurt from being cramped up next to the offensive lineman who had to share a toilet with. See, look at this way. And I swear I'm not a masochist, but if you look at comparative like dynamics here, you come out of the comb team locker room and you just came out of your ice bath, your massage, your comfy chair. You did your, you don't do those on game day, whatever, whatever. You come out of that and then you get out into the stadium. It is comparatively less comfortable. So you're less comfortable. But if you're the away team and you have your discomfort, then you get on the field and you're like, Oh, finally, it's so much better. You feel better after that, right? They've got it all backwards. They've got it all backwards. I don't think so. I'm pretty sure I would have wanted more comfort in the home locker room and perform better when I was comfortable and and Lucy, goosy and ready to rock and roll. Then when I come out all cramped after being pushed into the toilet with the offensive lineman. Yeah. Oh man, this so the fail room is named in honor of James and fail at Mr. Fails request. Wait, this is an actual person. This is what it says. I don't know if it's real at Mr. Fails request his generous donation to the Crimson Tide Foundation made possible. This naming right for the visitors locker room at Bryant Denny Stadium. So wait, someone said that WSU is the WSU locker room. I got to show you this one. Oh my God. Hold on. Let me share my screen. Yeah. For everyone, you can only see this on glorious Spotify. Yeah, video exclusive on Spotify. Oh my God. That's like prison. It does look like, you know, those, um, when you went to King's Island, those little like mini lockers you would pay for it to put your balls in. That's what it looks like. I wonder if they charged each of the opposing players a quarter of the quarter machine. You can't get your stuff out without you. You gotta wear it as you're playing, you know, wrap around your wrist. You put it around your neck. So then somebody just rips it off to get angry with you. Oh, no, my valuables. That is hilarious. That is terrible. You can't even fit a helmet in one of those cubbies. I don't think they have benches. Wait, where are the seats? There are no seats. There's two people in here and they're standing. They're playing mirrors on the end. Wow. They're playing the endurance route. You have to stand forever. Your legs will be fatigued before you even play us. That is sad. You know, that was actually utilized in war. Whoa, is in war. Making your opponent wait. Oh, God. I thought you were thinking that like for a war, people went into a stadium and they were like, I'm like, Tyler, no, that's not war. No, it wasn't war. No, but like during the winter time making like, I mean, starving out was obviously a tactic, but in war, like people would have their armies march to the field after somebody else had gotten there and they had to stand there in the cold waiting for the opposing front to arrive. Like in the old old school war and that was an advantage because all of a sudden everything was cold. It affected the guns and everything else. You know, that's the best home field advantage is like a way. It's hard to be invaded. I know that from risk in risk, you have a disadvantage if you're the attacker. It's true. Also, this picture looks incredibly depressing. They just have tiny stools. The guy can't even lean back. There's no doors on the locker. They can't arrest this. They're right next to what looks like a hazmat thing. Yeah. I assume it's just their laundry basket. When it's yellow, I'm like, I wonder what things you're putting in there. And so, but this looks like our home high school locker room. Yes. Like, so coming from anything like this is like, yeah, that's just what a locker room looks like, right? So maybe it's just some places are like that, but I'm sure that at the college level, it might be a little different. It's also a lot fancier nowadays. Our old high school built like a whole new facility in the locker room is so much nicer than it was when we were there. I think our school was just cheap. Yeah, probably. Yeah, you probably right. So aside from the locker room, we talked about the sidelines for the dolphins, how they use that. What other ways do you think? Or hold on, pause. Pause. It's pink a relaxing color. That's not just making sense to me. That doesn't make any sense. Why would pink be a relaxing color? Isn't that the color of love? If we wouldn't, it just make everyone average. Maybe maybe that's part of the reason. Maybe they come out and instead of wanting to hit them, they want to hug them. Oh, wait. Okay. So I actually see it. One shade of pink known as drunk tank pink is sometimes used in prisons to calm inmates. And so I bet there is a color they're using. Yeah, there's probably research that shows that, but I still don't think that like what's the most relaxing color. Okay. New research. This is an article written in 2019. New research claims that dark blue is the world's most relaxing color. Well, that's very different from pink. Respondents were asked to name their favorite colors in which were and the word which they associated most with them. Dark shades of blue were most often associated with a feeling of calm. Professor Anne Franklin from the University of Sussex is a school of psychology suggested in a blog post that color preference could be driven by how color is encoded by sensory mechanisms in the eye and brain. So apparently pink is completely wrong. It's blue, dark blue. I guess they need to reexamine and re-study for prisons and paint them dark blue and then also then sports teams will use that. Hmm. Maybe. Maybe. Anyway, continue. What were you talking about? I was paying attention. All right. So obviously the locker room has it has an advantage. Build your perfect visitor locker room to make the most discomfort imaginable. Okay, got it. First up when they the curtain that there's no door. It's a curtain of ice cold water that blasts over them. So they have to walk into the locker room, sopping wet and we, we market it as like, look, it's a high speed shower. You get to the field more efficiently. And then as soon as they're in, they're doused with cold water. And then we have hyper jets just blasting them with, with air and we're like, it's the drying system, but it's actually, oh, the heater on the dryer is broken. So it's like ice cold air that blast them in saps their strength. Okay. There's not really a locker room. It's a locker pit. So they throw all their stuff into the pit in the middle and then they can sit around the edge of the pit and there's like unlimited seating is like, it's so, it's so utilitarian. And so there's actually one big TV screen, but it's on the ceiling. Oh my God. So people have to look at it like this and they get a pain in their neck when they're just constantly looking up like that, right? Oh my God. They walk out to the field like, ah, right? Yeah. And then there's one toilet. It's actually in the middle of the pit. No, no, stall walls or anything. Everybody watches. When you build your own wall out of your, your goodies and if they fall in the toilet, that's, you didn't build your, your privacy wall. Good. All right. With sacrificial pooper in the center, go. You know how there's like in some news shows, there's like windows to the background to the street and you can see that. Well, it's great fan experience because the locker room is completely open with windows to fan. Everyone could see it in a perfect sphere around it. So from every angle, they can witness what the opposing team is going to do. Talk about demoralizing. No, no, no. Do you give your fans like dry erase markers to write on the window? Nope. There's just have to come up with our own implements of writing. And then what we can actually do is actually we on the TV is just a looping video of every injury that their team has ever experienced. Like any teammate that's ever experienced an injury is playing on the TV above. That would be terrifying. So they can learn from their mistakes. So they can learn from their mistakes. That's terrifying. That's like, now I don't even want to play, which is very advantageous. That's smart. Thank you. Thank you. I'm available for hire for. I don't think many of those things would be past legal, but you know, legal, legal, schmiegel. That's what I always say. So in most sports, you play in a grass field, right? Sure. So there's this interesting story I want to tell you. Jeff, for tennis, tennis can be played on clay. Dirt. Not concrete. So I remember some things Tyler, you say, yes, I remember something. I was waiting for you to say blood. Blood. Did I say that before? Did I say that? Yes. Okay. Blood. Yes. Blood. No, but most sports, particularly that deal with lock rooms of this size, it's like football. There are ways that like groundskeepers would affect the game. And like if your team was a big powerful team that basically ran the ball up the middle, say thinking before the forward pass was allowed in football, the groundskeeper would actually cut the grass shorter in the middle of the field and be taller on the outside of the field. If you're facing a team that runs with speed, whereas you're with power, because if you play a team with speed, they're going to run to the outside and taller grass will slow them down, allowing your team to then force them to have to use the middle and have an advantage in order to be able to tackle the faster team. I see, I see. Is that not legal? They can't not allow it. If you do it right, you can be. I don't know if it was ever ruled illegal. It might have been at one time, but it used to be something that was commonplace. In fact, in the most recent Super Bowl, the Eagles versus the Chiefs, the person who was the groundskeeper for the field was the Chiefs longtime groundskeeper who was retiring after. And I think his name was like Nickname was like Dr. Turf or something like that. So what I'm gathering from this is it's less home field advantage. It's more just cheat in whatever is the most subtle way you possibly can. Is that what I'm getting out of this? It kind of just seems like it's like it's utilizing things within the rules to get the most adamant advantage possible. Which I is so cheating. It's like in the it gets this is like we've talked about this before many times of like bending the rules to be like maximizing your advantage. And I know it's like a natural human thing to min max, but it's also like there was a video on Reddit of this marathon runner that went the wrong way right at the end. He was in first place and then he went past it. Then the guy in second place slowed down and let the guy in first win again. This happened many times. It's been many videos like this. Yeah, good sportsmanship. The comments were filled with people being like, nah, I should have just taken it. He doesn't have that killer instinct. He's like, he had the window right there and he let it slip right through his fingers. It's like it's not his fault if the other guy was too stupid not to know where the finish line was. And it's all these people were like, that's not the point. Would you feel good winning that way? If the only reason you won was because the other person made like a wrong turn right then they were better than you the entire time. And yet at the very end they slipped up. And it's fine. Like I get it and people argue, look, you know, they made a mistake. It's like, I wouldn't feel good about that. I'd be like, that guy's kicking my ass this whole time. If I suddenly put on a burst of speed that was all my own, I'd rather win from my own skill than someone else's disadvantage. I'd rather beat someone at their best. And I think that's the difference is like I would rather beat someone at their best as opposed to beating someone because they fucked up. I agree with you. I get like sometimes sometimes the best isn't isn't fucking up but at the in a race in a foot race you're being measured and how good you can run. And it's like, it's just I agree with you. I agree with you. I think this to a degree is is fine because it's within the realm of the rules and it's fair and everybody does it. I'm mad about like the home field. I think it's hilarious. Oh, no. Like that's that's because I don't think it necessarily actually has like, well, maybe it does. I have no idea. It's probably like the smallest like percentile. I don't know if they've ever studied like the locker rooms or different things to actually get into it. Yeah. There are certain things that have been an advantage to the point to where it's overwhelming. Like crowd noise obviously happens. Yeah. Yeah. I would put a lot more on the fans but maybe like, you know, home home field is it is different. But when it comes down to like the locker room stuff, I almost wonder if it has a counter effect because of fuck you energy, right? Yeah. Yeah. That's what I was going to say. Like you're going to like screw us over this will just makes you mad. It would it would make you mad. And I think getting mad is good when it comes down to playing against the team. I really wonder if it works like opposite of how they think it does. I feel like the color probably doesn't affect them. It's probably more of a chuckle than anything else. Yeah. Yeah. But definitely like being in a cramped space and stuff like that, I think it negatively infects your body but mentality wise, it increases it because like, I think I have that same mentality of you do with like fuck you energy. Like if somebody else is like chanting somebody else's name, I'm like, I'm going to show you up because I know what I'm capable of. And unless you bring your A game, you're going down, which is why I'm so upset that I can't box because I fully anticipated fighting somebody who would be more of the crowd favorite than I would and then just punching them in the face. Yeah, exactly. But I can't because I had a kidney transplant. It's okay. Yeah. I have other things that I can win at like water polo and mind games. Yes, I can telekinetically overpower somebody else. Can you? I don't know. Is that the power of having three kidneys? Is that you would unlock your telekinesis? No, no, no, that's not, it's not at all. Nope. Nope. I'm the random person that's not in your room. Okay, good. Cool. Cool. Cool. Cool. Awesome. Awesome. Awesome. Good. Anyway, home field advantage has a significant marker. Most teams have a higher percentage of winning when they play at home because of all these different things that we've discussed. So that I'm so sorry. I have to pause because I need to fucking delete my Duolingo account. This is so goddamn annoying is that this is such a sidebar. This is so different. Talk about like opposite of motivational things is it never because back when I first signed up for Duolingo, it was when you were trying to learn German, right? Yeah, way back when and there was a thing where it's like if you did have friends, you could compete against friend and then they changed it to be just the global leader to the board and you never needed friends. And then every time I open the fucking app, not even like doing anything because I don't really use it anymore. It all makes notification be like, oh, everyone's congratulating you for keeping up. I'm like, shut the fuck up. I am literally deleting my account right now. Look, Duolingo's fine. I'm not they're not paying me anything. So I'm just going to I'm deleting it because it's like because I'm marker plier on there. So everyone fucking finds it. And then there'll be a post on Reddit like I'm looking at the subreddit of distractible and GMF is see while we do this. And it's just like, it's a, whoa, yeah, he's doing it. I'm like, shut the fuck up. Don't look at me. So talk about the opposite effect. There is this there was literally an effect like of unintended consequences, right? Mm hmm. Effect of effect of unintended consequences. And so this is the unintended consequences, Duolingo of you constantly putting this out and making these tools that let people harass and not harassing, but it comes across as harassment. The law of unintended consequences, observed phenomena in which any action as results that are not part of the actor's purpose, the supplier for Lewis consequences may or may not be foreseeable or even immediately observable and they may be beneficial, harmful or neutral. And in home field advantage, I have a funny feeling that all of the efforts going in to demoralize your opponents actually are a victim of law of unintended consequences. And if you mistreat your opponents, I have a funny feeling it's just going to piss them off and if you make your home team too cushy, they're going to get too comfortable. That's how I tie it all together. Nice. Nice. It's good. It's good. It's been like good. All right. Anyway, sorry. What were you saying? I'm going to build your home home team advantage now. We're going to start from the ground up. All right. We're just going to go to the locker room. What color are you painting your locker room and what color are you painting your opposing teams locker room? I know I'll give you some colors. Red supposedly increases energy and excitement. Green is calming and soothing. Blue may cause feelings of sadness, gloom and boredom. Yellow, bright yellow can cause feelings of frustration and anger and orange creates a happy and energetic atmosphere. I painted black, turned the lights off. Is that the visitor room or the home home room? Both. It's this. I'm going to blur the lines. There's no home room. There's no visitor room. It's one big group. All the lights are off. It's been black. Black walls, black everything. Joey, is that you over there? Hunt Hunt hike. Oh, that's the wrong person. Yeah. Is that what happened? I may not know about things of sports. I know they don't practice spiking. Was it called? I know they don't practice snapping. Screw this up in the football. No, no, no. They don't they don't practice snapping in the locker. Yes, they do. Yes, they do. Yes, they do. No way. No way. Once they're fully dressed. Yes, because you want to make sure that exchange between the center and the quarterback is perfect. Every single time. There's no flaw. There's no yes. The snaps occur in the locker room. No, no. Yes. Yes. No. Always. No. No. It's a posse. That way they can say Anakin, I have the high ground. Okay. Well, that's not anywhere near close to what what the fuck did you just say? Who was that supposed to be? Oh, be one. What happened to you was wrong. He became he became Palpatine. I don't think that happened in the lore. You know, I'm just going to go ahead and say it. I don't think that occurred. That's what happens in the locker room. When you did. Oh man, I think even less of that is true. I don't know about that. All right. Moving on. Okay. All right. You can choose two advantages for your sideline. A shorter walk from your locker room, air conditioning, shading from the sun or closer to your fans. Keep in mind the two that you don't choose your opponent gets. Uh, what's this shorter walk? Doesn't matter. What is this? Like, oh, no, they're going to walk a little bit longer. Okay. Proximity with fans and probably air conditioning just to keep them cool, right? Yeah, but keep in mind if the opposing team is closer to the fans, they're going to be yelling and throwing milk bones and stuff at them. Well, again, I think it's more important to give your team. Why would you like? Oh, look at them. Our fans are really yelling at them. Wish they were cheering for us as long as they're cheering for, then have another team booed against, you know, I feel you're going to have air conditioning, but you're going to be in the sun and you're going to be closer to your fans. Yeah. Because if I'm in the sun, I got the air conditioning. So I'm good. All right. So they'll be shaded and they have the shorter walk. Yes. All right. Now for the ref. You get to choose the refs that you know, you feel that your game sometimes. Okay. You got honest Al who judge completely and partially no matter his judgments and then won't be challenged by anyway. Preferential Paul who will call slightly more fouls on the away team and favor the home team in this judgment calls. However, it'll be slightly more likely to have his rulings challenged and then tendinaceous Tim who will strongly favor the home team, always ruling in their favor and fouling the away team in every turn. Ten denaceous Tim ten denaceous. Yeah. Ten ten denaceous. Ten. How do you say that word? I don't know what word you're saying. Ten denaceous. T E N D E N T I O U S. Ten dent. Yes. That's it. All right. I have never heard this word in my life. Neither have I. Ten denaceous. Thank you writing research assistant for that one. I have never heard of that word. Ten denaceous. Expressing or intending to promote a particular cause or point of view, especially a controversial one. Oh, it's a it's an offshoot of tendency. That would make sense. Having a tendency to be in tendentious. That's stupid. That's stupid. You see it. That's what I have a problem with people that overly rely on a the fourth. That's number one. I can't say it. Number two. Number two. It's like it just leads to pretentiousness. Tendency I get. You have a tendency to do something. But being tendentious is just another roundabout way to make people confused. Language is meant to be understood. And I prefer honest. Al not preferential Paul or tendentious. I want him shot. Shoot. Ten denaceous. Ten. I agree with you because I want a fair match and I want to win by fair and square ways. Honest Al all the way. Exactly. Because I'm not a cheater. I don't cheat. I ain't about that. Yeah, we are the SEC here. Huh? What? I'm not calling out an entire conference. What did you say? Nothing. I didn't hear what you said. I said we're not the SEC here. You really think I know much about what you're referring to that I'm like, no. Did you say? What the fuck did you say? No, I'm just like, I didn't fucking hear you. We want to win with good officials that will be honest about their decisions. Ah, I see sure wink. Anyway, that's basically the whole thing of home field advantage. Locker rooms, field cutting, sunlight, officials, fans. The episode title will be named home field advantage, parentheses, AKA cheating with style. Cheating with style. All right. Well, I learned a lot. I learned a lot about the horrible things that go on in the world of sport. Oh, wait. And in Langdon. Hold on a second. That's not my job. Ah, my job. I've learned so much about sport that I'm going to take into my non sport life and I'm going to appreciate it more. Yeah. I don't know. I feel like I get an F on this episode. I'm from the beginning and then after now, I don't think I, I think I did the opposite of good one. I'm supposed to. No, you did good. You built, you built really disadvantaged locker rooms with the circle pit toilet and the TV ceiling and the aquarium, esque walls. Yeah. I mean, it is in it, in adherence with what they were trying to do. But yeah, I don't feel good about it, but I am good at it. Don't feel good about it, but you're good at it. Yeah. Story in my life. Well, thank you, Mark, for coming up with the most horrible ways to gain an advantage that hopefully nobody ever uses. And I hope this episode gives you some insight into how sports teams and schools take advantage of skirting around the rules to increase their home field advantage. Hey, KA shooting. And maybe it could be detrimental and in fact, motivate the other team to win. That's what I think actually does happen. I think that happens. I'm actually curious if people have observed this in their life. Those of you that have listened have ever seen your home, like high school locker room and seen the visitors' locker room or experienced it in your sports life or just happened to experience it because maybe you were the band and the football team shoves you in the away locker room to do your stuff because I know that happens and it's not OK. Facilities should be equal in share. There we go. One room for everyone. With the lights out and painted black as Mark would have. Yes, all right. Thank you everybody for listening. Go check out the merch, check out Mark's stuff over on his YouTube channel, check out me on socials. Maybe I'll get back to streaming sometime. But we'll see you in the next episode. That's for dang sure. Mm hmm. Bye. Bye. .