Hello, elegant listeners, and welcome to GO!
Hi, favorite sports team.
I don't have a volume knob right now.
Oh, no.
I'm sorry for destroying your ears, Mark.
Yeah, yeah. I have no idea how to turn the volume down on this.
For those of you who are watching on Spotify, you might realize it's something's going wrong over in my camera.
Ah, everything. You know how if you walk away from a computer, everything changes absolutely and will never stay the same no matter what?
Yeah, that shouldn't normally happen, but...
Oh, of course it should. That's exactly what does happen.
Anyway, God, do you even turn down the volume?
I have to activate a suite of something that's going to add more...
Oh, head foot.
Are you quieter? I don't know. Am I?
Yes, you are.
Oh, my God.
Anyway, so all my shit broke and I don't know why, but I'm here. Nothing will stop me from reporting the sports news.
And today's news, uh, Brady.
No.
Dad at 53.
Today's news is sports have been put at a standstill in the United States.
Sports have been put by the wayside by sports broadcasts.
Yes, BN, NFL, everybody has stopped talking about sports and started talking about a relationship.
A budding, blossoming romance.
Potentially.
You know, it's really interesting.
So, Mark, sports are out the window today.
It's still sports ancillary, but there's an interesting thing.
So, do you know the name Travis Kelsey?
Of course, who doesn't know about missing?
He went to UC when you were there.
What did you know every student of the college you went to?
How would I know who one person is?
How would I know that?
I don't even know the names of my teachers all through high school.
I don't even remember your name.
That's, that's a lie.
Quiz me.
I dare you to quiz me. Ask me what your name is.
What's my name?
I never get it. I don't know.
Why?
Anyway, so Travis Kelsey was a star tied in for the Cincinnati Bearcats.
He was drafted in 2013 by the Kansas City Chiefs.
Recently, there's been a development.
Travis Kelsey went to a Taylor Swift concert.
Like any other Swiftie would.
Anyone who likes Taylor Swift, you know who Taylor Swift is, right?
Maybe.
Mark.
Maybe.
Musician.
Yeah.
Well, Travis Kelsey went to a Taylor Swift concert in Arrowhead Stadium.
His home stadium where he plays football.
And he went to that game or went to that concert.
And he wanted to give a friendship bracelet
to Taylor Swift.
Now, Taylor Swift's fan base is known for exchanging friendship bracelets.
Because of a song lyric in one of her songs.
It became very popular that Swifties had a lot of fun with Taylor Swift.
It was very popular.
It was very popular.
It was very popular.
It was very popular.
It was very popular.
It was very popular.
It was very popular that Swifties, when they would go to concerts, would exchange friendship bracelets.
Little beads would strings.
You know, they'd put their names on it.
They'd put really cool monikers, love yourself, different things like that.
Cool things.
And they'd exchange friendship bracelets.
So Travis Kelsey went to this game,
and he made a friendship bracelet.
And he talked about it afterwards.
He was really upset because he didn't get a chance to give it to Taylor Swift.
that Taylor doesn't talk to anybody before after a concert in order to preserve her voice
and stuff like that because she puts on a long show. It's like multiple, multiple hours and stuff
like that. Uh-huh. Well, Travis Kelsey talked about this. And soon the NFL was talking about it as
well because Travis Kelsey not only wanted to just give friendship bracelet, but he wanted to give
Taylor Swift his phone number. He wanted to spit some rizz. He wanted to see if there was a
budding romance that could come of this. He was shooting a shot, you know. Uh-huh. So the NFL
after seeing Taylor Swift sell out these massive stadiums picked up on this and all of a sudden
they're talking about it. Travis Kelsey scores a touchdown. Oh, he found a blank space that they're
making all these references to Taylor Swift songs. All right. Uh-huh. So much so that I will now share
with you this particular video that I found because I went down a rabbit hole for this.
I hope you know. Uh-huh. Okay. A rabbit hole. All right. All right. I'm so ready to be.
You ready? Yeah, sure. All right. Well, even though that bone bruise and the injury one
would think is delicate. He's been able to shake it off. I should have known that all too well
that you would not know. Well, I mean, you saw it on Thursday night when Travis Kelsey wasn't in there
at left of blank space. Uh-huh. But I think he returns today and proves to be the anti-hero.
I'm with you. I've never picked this new song. Everything is a Taylor Swift reference. Oh, I
don't know the chiefs. Oh, Kelsey coming out August is over. Oh, good. That was September.
So yeah, they, uh, they were rooting for this budding romance. All right. Uh-huh. Okay. All right.
So much so that it was all over. Commentators were talking about everybody was talking about this
potential romance. And on Sunday, Taylor Swift not only shows up to the football game,
but is seated in the family suite next to his mother watching the football game.
Okay. Taylor Swift and Travis Kelsey. This conversation, the entire sports world has stopped.
Everybody is all consumed ever. It's all over the place. So much so that after Sunday,
Travis Kelsey's jersey became the top five most sold ever. He gained 300,000 followers
on Twitter and Swifties are learning football. And let me tell you, Swifties, if you're looking
to learn football, we have an episode for you. Get out. Get the fuck out. What are you doing here?
Look, we're accessible, but not to your kind. Whoa, whoa, whoa, don't listen to the
long, long, long. I want to listen to a boomer singing songs like Taylor Swift. I want the
new generation of music. I don't want no millennial. Get them out of here.
Old hat. I'm going to be dead in three days. Yes, you will.
No, but seriously, it's crazy how deep of a dive this has gone. I was waiting for someone to
ascend from the fifth base. I was waiting for you to tell me that you're recording the podcast
because you just won the lottery. I was waiting for the horrible twist when there was a 20 car pile
up in the middle of this football stadium. I did not know that I was waiting that entire time
to hear, oh, golly, gee, this football player might be dating. Dailers with Newtly,
Daily. According to current speculation, because like I said, I went down the rabbit hole.
After the game, I was struggling at my computer for like 30 minutes prior to this episode.
I don't have a lot of time. I fly. You know when I leave for the airport for 30. I'll tell you,
you don't even have to guess. You know how long that is from now? Eight and a half hours from now.
Look, I haven't got a lot of time and I spent it. I spent it setting up because I was like,
oh, Tyler's got a good one. He's got a good one today. And then I'm like, all right, I'm ready.
All right, I went through all this trouble. I can't wait to hear it. And now I have to chop my
own ears off to forget that I ever heard this stupid news. It's important. The whole world is
talking about it. Why is it important? Just because people are talking about it doesn't
automatically make something important. This is about the least important thing we've ever
talked about it. And we talked about the Romans fighting those mountain people. And they Bob
slidded their way to death. That's what we talked about when that dumb, we're talking about babies
going saluting. What is it called skeleton? That's one. They called baby marked it that. That
was about the dumbest thing I heard until this today. Who cares?
All right. Tell me why I should care. Well, I can't wait. I love this. I have so many friendship
bracelets. I can't wait. All right. So there's speculation before all of this came out that this
was all publicity stunt. How do you know about that? How do you know? Why did I wake up this
morning? Why did that have to happen to me? Why did I have to experience the day that is today
and have it end with this travesty? This is horrible. And I object to this. I just accuse myself
so that I can be banned from this podcast. Did Amy pop in and say that you know what we're talking?
Oh, you couldn't hear probably because this microphone is so directional that didn't even pick it up.
Amy, we didn't even hear you. What Amy said was I can't believe you're talking about that crap.
Who cares? That's what I heard. That's what I heard. And as far as everyone knows,
that's what they heard. This mic's pretty good, actually. Yeah. Yeah. I like the fact that it
sounds good. I didn't even do anything to actually plug it in. It's pretty good mic. Yeah.
I had a sitting in a box. Well, you know who else sounds good? Taylor Swift. Oh, god. Oh, my.
Listen, listen. I went down a rabbit hole because I thought this was entertaining. And the
simple fact of a few different things. For one, people are obsessed with this. Right. I can tell.
People are obsessed with Taylor Swift's dating life because she writes songs about it. Her songs
are basically like a diary of her life. Okay. Yeah. Well, her favorite number is 13. And Travis
Kelsey happens to be the 13th guy that she's dated publicly, supposedly. So it's a big deal.
Inner songs. She's talking. You can't just say something's a big deal. It's a big deal to
Swifties. Oh, my goodness. Oh, my goodness. We look at their rising sunsines and their falling
crescent moons. They aligned up on the number 27. Oh, man. Additionally, additionally, you dig
down the rabbit hole. There's the song lyrics where she talks about you'll be 89 and I'll be 87.
Travis Kelsey happens to wear 87 and she was gifted in 89 Kansas City Chiefs Jersey before
the actual concert in Kansas City. Secondly, additionally, Travis Kelsey showed up in a particular
style denim's get up. That was 1989 bedroom print or something. She has a show coming out the 1980
1989 TV, which I think is like Taylor Swift's TV channel or something. I don't know enough about
it to really talk about it. Like, all of this is absolutely insane and getting blown out of
proportion in a massive way. And the rabbit holes that I have found on TikTok of people commenting
on it and everything, even in the speculation or buying into it. You're going to eat, if you believe
in that, like the, oh, the 89 to my 80. So you're going to be at the deli counter on December 12th
at 12 12 p.m. And you're going to pull out your number to get your order taken. It's going to be
the number 12. And you're going to lock eyes with the meat lady behind the counter. You're going to
be like, what's your name? And she's going to go 12 and we're going to get married.
What is this? What am I looking at? This is speculation. This was before the official news was
released before Sunday. And I just really appreciated this guy. Uh-huh.
Because it made me laugh.
Hey, real quick. It's a newly converted Swiftie fan in a lifelong Kelsey fan. You know, Jason
Travis, Mama Kelsey, pop up the whole Kelsey crew. Travis, don't miss your shack. The whole world
behind you right now. You went on a show to find love. The world right now is telling Taylor Swift
she wants to go on a date with you. Can you guys imagine the babies running for a touch down the
catch it? They land the wilder in flight. They're singing the newest hit single. I'm a catch this touch down.
All right. All right. There's more. There's more. There's more. I was there more.
There's nothing else to the story. There's nothing else. There's so much more than the story.
That was a one sentence updated at the very beginning of this episode that couldn't possibly be
more. How many more numbers? What's a birthday? Do they align? Oh, are they secretly related? Do
they have the same grandma? It's destiny. No, I wanted to bring up the fact of something he brought up
which was the TV show Travis Kelsey had when he was doing trying to find love. What? Back in,
back in 2016, he had a TV show, a dating show called Catching Kelsey. Why did he have a TV show?
Where 50 women from 50, all 50 different states came on to see if they could imagine
and date Travis Kelsey. And one of them was Taylor Swift. None of them were Taylor Swift.
From the great state of Minnesota. Oh, Oklahoma. Rhode Island. No one ever guesses it.
I'm going to. Oh, did I guess it right? She was born in Pennsylvania. Well, there you go.
It's basically Ohio's neighbor destiny. But then she grew up in Tennessee. Well, I mean,
yeah, Ohio's neighbor. You're right. There you go. Destiny. But here's the thing. Here's the thing
that people are talking about. All right. Yes. The fact is that she showed. Let me get some people
are talking about them possibly dating. Oh, man, I can't wait to expand on that subject. The fact
is that they it's pretty much confirmed that they're dating. She was in the booth with his mom
talking with his mom. Like you don't you're not chummy with somebody's mom unless you've been seen
each other for a while. Generally speaking, moms is a big swifty fan could be fan could be. You never
know. But I mean, it's everyone's making jokes about it. The Philadelphia Eagles before their
game tonight posted a TikTok where they were talking about their favorite combo of Kelsey and
Swift because they have a running back named Yandre Swift and Travis's brother Jason is an
offensive lineman. He's the center for the Philadelphia Eagles. And so they posted a TikTok showing
them two together. Hey, the audience wanted this podcast to be a romance podcast at one point.
So we're doing it. We're filling them in. What is it? Wait, when did when did that happen to be
a romance podcast? It was a while ago. It was when you were when we talked about is dating a sport
after that. They're like, we should talk about romance and love. All right. Okay. So now we are
officially the sports gossip podcast because that's where the big money is. I don't want to talk
about no dumb sports. I want to hear about all the latest news of who's who and who's cheating on
who with who I can't wait to hear more. What's the guys name Kelsey Travis Kelsey? Yeah.
Travis Kelsey. Okay. I can't wait to hear about Kelsey's exploits. Is it ventures? Yeah, exploits.
How did he get a TV show? Because he's a one of the best tight ends to ever play the game of football.
He's won multiple super balls. He's been in all pro year after year. He's been a phenomenal athlete.
And he has incredible charisma. Him and his brother actually have a podcast. And they're
pretty funny dudes. They're from Ohio. I mean, talent. Talent just comes from Ohio, you know.
We're in Ohio. I mean, they both went to UC Jason and Travis. Fascinating. Well,
you know, we have to do now. We have to destroy their podcast from the inside out. What we'll do,
what we'll do is we'll infiltrate this organization. We'll get all the juicy deep and then we'll
sabotage a relationship. I'll set you up, Taylor Swift. And then we can take the world by storm.
I'll accessory, but
that's the true future. I'm manifesting it.
Right. You can manifest it, but that's that's you doing. I'm manifesting it.
I'm manifesting it. All right, Mark. You want to talk about other sports news now?
No, I don't actually. I don't want to talk about this some more. I want to hear more about this.
Breaking Sports News. Also on Sunday, the Pittsburgh Steelers charter plane made a very
important emergency landing in Kansas City. They weren't playing a game there or anything.
The Steelers landed due to oil pressure failure in one of the plane's engines.
It totally had nothing to do with feeling left out of the T-Swift drama. Not at all.
This news most definitely not sponsored by the City of Pittsburgh. In Pennsylvania,
where Taylor Swift happens to be from, not that that's relevant or anything.
I heard a rumor that
that
you know why she came to Arrowhead, right? What's Arrowhead? Travis Kelsey spat the line.
I've seen you rock the stage in Arrowhead. You might have to come see me rock the stage at Arrowhead,
which is the name of the stadium. Spat the line. Yeah, I think that's called saying a sentence.
There was nothing. There's nothing to be spat in that.
What do you mean spat the line? You said spade was driven out of his ears.
No, I heard you were at this city. Why don't you see me at the city, too?
I'm going to be there. Don't you worry about that. I've heard of that one before. You remember it?
I'm going to be there and you were there in the past. Now I'll be there in the future.
I can't unfathomable, Riz. Unquestionable, Riz. God-like, Riz.
This might be our funniest podcast episode ever because of how much you hate everything about this.
Look, I don't hate everything about it. I find it fascinating, but it occupies that much in my
mind where it goes like, that's how much it occupies my mind. Listen, I, a bunch of swifties,
fans of Taylor Swift want to learn football now because she is dating a football player. This is
our opportunity to be that place where they can learn. All right. Well, we already covered it.
This is just an excuse for you to do another primer on football. No, I'm telling them
to go do the go listen to the old. All right. We have an animation. It's on my channel,
but you can also listen to the full football primer. If you want to know all about football and
learn it and it'll make Taylor Swift like you literally go listen to our primer on football. It's a fact.
There you go, Swifties. You have your access. I have no problem. By the way, I want to say
very clearly. I have no problem with Taylor Swift. I have no problem with Mr. Kelsey. I have no
problem with any of this. Totally fine. 100% okay. You just hate the fact. There's no
boss. Did I say bot? Did I say bot? No, I'm, I find this very entertaining and I can't wait.
I don't know how to hold this. I can't wait. I can't wait. Find out more.
I can't wait to find out what the next chapter in this beautiful love story is.
All I know though is I'll say that Taylor Swift copyright struck the parody video that you
me and Matthias did long ago. Actually, I think that was the publishing house that she ended up
suing in order to, there was, there was a whole thing with that, but never mind. All is forgiven.
Yeah, I think that was somebody that she lost like ownership of songs too and then they
struck like everything. It's a whole thing. Taylor Swift, please, see, this was our opportunity
to get Taylor Swift and Swifties to like us. So then they would unstrike that video.
They don't like us. They're never going to like us. And we shouldn't care. We shouldn't
base our self-worth on what the Swifties think of us. I'm not. It seems like you are.
I'm, I'm just saying they, I'm the way I thought of this was this was an opportunity
for us to help them learn to woo. I'm not wooing them. I'm trying to help give them an opportunity
to learn the sport because they want to learn it so that they can have something more relatable
to Taylor Swift because now that she's dating Travis Kelsey officially because it has been disclosed
after the game. First of all, they left together. He drove his vintage car, which is purple and
beautiful with the top down. They ended up going to a restaurant, which here say Taylor Swift paid
for everybody's dinner and told them to get out. And then they had a party with all of the other
Kansas City chiefs. And there's just a good story. I don't know. It's just a morally good story.
And so they had a they had a like nice after victory date after the football game. How do people
know about this? She's trying to get some privacy. Be it to got people crawling out of the air,
dogs being like, it's a purple vintage car. Wow. I just like I can't like I said, I went down
a rabbit hole and there was somebody that was up until like six o'clock in the morning,
tracking all of this stuff because of contacts at different restaurants and things. It's wild.
Yeah. Oh. Oh, well anyway.
But that's that's basically the episode I had was that sports the NFL everybody has come to a
standstill to basically talk about this particular relationship. It has been the headline news has
been the front story. It has been everything it has taken over sports in America, especially
everything NFL related in beyond every podcast was talking about this. All of the sports news
were interviewing and asking Jason, his brother, if it was official, they were like, it was insane.
How much because of this potential relationship that seems to be officially a relationship now
was taking over sports broadcasting to the point to where all that sports news outlets were
talking about was is Taylor Swift dating Travis Kelsey or they were supporting to try and get Taylor
Swift to be interested in Travis Kelsey. I don't know the situation, but I it was very fascinating.
Some people were speculating that she was going to date Travis so that the Philadelphia Eagles could
win the Super Bowl because she's a Philadelphia Eagles fan, which happens to be our brothers team
or not her brothers team, Travis's brothers team. It's wild. There's so much so much speculation
about everything and it's ridiculous. The tangents and that like that's why I went down this
rabbit hole. It was just like, I am fascinated. It's also terrifying if you think about it. Yes,
to imagine that anyone would hyperanalyze every movement of your life. Yeah, to that degree
is almost manning to some people, you know, and that's why that's why some celebrities they go
crazy and they go nuts up because they can't handle it. It's not just about the paparazzi, but it's
a complete lack of privacy on everything you do. And if they do break up, it'll create the most
amazing music she's ever written in her life because nothing could top the amount of profundity
that their relationship has stirred. I mean, she is notorious for writing break-up songs after
all of her past relationships. Yes, you know how I know that? Could you set it at the beginning?
Oh, did I? I learned, I listened. But based off of this, this is the true reason why like,
I've talked about this a few times and I understand it in even greater perspective as I watch
this stuff happen, why I want to have a part of my life be private. I don't want to have everything
be public. And I think you're the same way. Like, nothing you want to have part of your life
not be in the public eye and not have people over analyzing. And the fact that this is so public and
so over analyzed and so speculative and everything constantly is wild. And I hope people give them
the space to actually get to know each other and find out if they are good for each other.
And I'm rooting for them to find whatever happiness that is.
I'm going to read all the fan fiction that people are writing about it. I can't wait to get
into the dirty details of people's imaginations about this. That's what I want to leap off the
cliff of depravity into the chasm of another adjective that's just like depravity.
I'm sure there's stuff already out. And it is sports related. Are you going to look it up?
No, I'm not. All right, hold on.
Ah, okay. I'm going to leap off the cliff of depravity into the chasm of corruption
and swim in the river of perversions and dalliance in the desert of deviant sea and debauchery.
And she's right.
Anyway, that's going to do it for this episode.
Um, apparently, yeah, cool. Thank you so much for listening to the non sports, sports news
regarding Taylor Swift and Travis Kelsey dating. Maybe they're together. Maybe it's exciting.
You said officially confirmed. You literally said officially confirmed.
According to TikTok. Oh, it's all speculative.
All speculative. I'm speculating that they've been seeing each other for a while. The fact that
she was chummy with Kelsey's mom. Ah, don't be chummy. Okay. Oh, be chummy. If you want to be
chummy, if that's what you feel in your soul, be chummy. Anyway, if you two want to find the love
of your life, you can sport our amazing merch. We hear it makes you at least 0.1 percent more
attractive if you wear the eye finger sports t-shirt hat or the full finger bundle.
It'll give plus 10 to fingering if you wear the eye finger sports finger. And coming soon,
the eye finger sports finger finger. It is coming soon. We have officially found one that will work
and we are working on the prototypical design, prototypical prototype design. He said it,
he meant it and you can get it at store.gmfst.com. Run there now or else you'll never get it again.
Anyway, you can find Mark. I like this microphone. This microphone is good.
It is a really good microphone. I like being able to hold it like this. It's nice.
Pulling out I could do Let's Play is one-handed. Yeah, well, you could. Just be an extra challenge.
Anyway, go see Mark's Let's Play is over on his YouTube channel. Go check me out.
My YouTube channel, please, I need views.
And I haven't uploaded a video in a while because I'm bed and busy. Yeah, busy, busy, busy.
Anyway, we'll see you in whatever the next episode brings. Take care, everybody. Bye.