Hello, elegant listeners and welcome to Go, my favorite sports team.
The Best Sports Podcast for non-sports knowers and also the most entertaining sports podcast
for sports knowers.
I'm Tyler Scheid, I'm your master of balls and holes and I'm joined by the illustrious
and ever intelligent Markiplier.
Ever intelligent, that's not a fact.
You don't know that.
There were times in my life when I had patently unintelligent moments.
Patently?
Sure, it's a word.
I don't question it right now.
My brain is not 100%.
I think now is one of those patently unintelligent moments.
But how are you Mark?
I know you're tired as you go on.
It's fine, it's fine, don't worry about it.
Don't worry about it.
I'm good, how are you?
I'm good, I started learning my classical guitar, been practicing that which has been
fun.
Pointless.
AI's gonna take over music in 10 years, you'll never play a note.
But I'll have this.
It's absolutely useless to pursue any personal improvement because AI is gonna take over.
I do not agree with this at all.
I'm very intelligent.
Ever intelligent, you might.
Your intelligence is never ending, I guess that would be ever intelligent, I don't know.
So it's a fountain of constant intelligence.
But that's good.
Does that mean you share it with those around you?
It just spurts out.
No, no, no, I'm not spurting my intelligence.
I never use the word spurt again.
How is that going?
I asked that.
Oh, sorry.
It's going well.
It's definitely frustrating because I'm still in the early stages, but it's going.
What do you want more from me?
I'm tired of the skill and it's frustrating.
It's just like I'm so curious.
All right, well, all right, I'm assuming you're a master now.
I'm not at that now.
Just sports.
But what I am a master at is being home.
That I'm.
Are you happy to be home?
I am happy to be home.
I just wish I was able to sleep fine.
It's not like people probably like, oh, he's so dark as he's overworked.
I haven't been doing shit.
But I just for some reason being back home and not being in the rhythm of filming, it's
screwing with my sleep for some reason.
I keep waking up like, I go set.
And then I just haven't been able to get good sleep.
I've been getting like four hours for the past week every night.
And I'm like, I'm so tired when I wake up and I wake up tired.
I'm like, I want to sleep more and then I can't fall back to sleep.
And I'm like, but all I want to do is sleep.
Bad.
Doesn't matter.
That's excuses for nonsense.
We're here to talk about sports.
Nothing will stop us from talking about sports.
You're right.
You're right.
Talking about the sport I want to state championship it.
You won the state champion in this Tyler.
What is it?
My wait, I don't know if you're asking for my last name or the sport.
You're like, Tyler, what is it?
No, no, wait, wait, did you forget my last name or did you forget the sport?
No, I know your last name.
Yeah, of course.
We all know it.
Everyone knows it.
All right, what is it?
We know it.
Come on.
I know it needs to say it out loud.
You don't want to put that kind of personal information out there on the internet or else
people might steal your identity.
You're you're you're right.
It's not at all posted on every single social platform that I use at all.
No, no, not at all.
That'd be horribly wrong bad of you to do.
Yes, everyone would discover exactly who I am.
But the sport is water polo water polo.
Okay.
And before people make the joke, we're not riding horses in the water.
I don't think people would make that joke because I'm pretty sure no one's first inclination
for polo or at least in the me not knowing sport category would be polo with the horses.
Honestly, I'd forgotten that polo with the horses existed.
What a silly sport polo.
Polo is interesting.
We'll have to do a primer on that at some point, but not today.
I would love to talk to someone that actually plays polo because that is fascinating.
How do you even get into that?
I feel like there's a lot of country clubs involved.
Yes, country clubs are definitely involved when it comes to polo.
I can't stop.
I feel like it's a very rich sport.
You got to be able to afford a horse and a lot of land.
How much does a horse cost?
Depends on how good the horse is, I guess.
By a horse you can expect to pay a hundred to ten thousand dollars.
You can get a horse for cheap.
Hold on.
Hold on.
Cheap business.
A hundred bucks for a horse.
That's no money at all.
That's easy.
I mean, yeah, you could probably get a horse for a hundred bucks, but I don't know what
quality of polo playing horse that would be.
It can learn, probably.
I wonder what horses cost a hundred dollars.
I imagine if you're doing the Adopt a Mustang program, I don't know if that still exists.
What?
The excuse of me?
Adopt a Mustang.
What the?
I've never heard of this.
Adopt a Mustang.
I just looked up Adopt a Mustang.
There's nothing about it.
Where were you adopting Mustangs?
Wild Horse?
Yeah.
Adopions and sales.
Adopions.
What do you mean you saying that like it's a normal thing?
I was like, adopt a Mustang.
There's a Wild Horse Rescue California.
Adopt a Rescue Horse or a Wild Mustang.
That's a thing.
But I'm not hearing where you would learn about adopt a Mustang.
That ain't a thing.
That is a thing that.
What are this distractible?
We're not here to talk about that.
We're here to talk about water polo.
Stay on topic.
Okay.
Okay.
Fine.
Let's get into water polo then.
Let's not because we have Jacuses.
See?
Now you tell me to do something and then you do something else.
I'm the ghost.
Don't wait for anybody.
Odd winter 7 531 says Tyler.
You didn't do the disclaimer we talked about.
Now how do I convince my roommates to stop?
You know.
Hope you're happy sincerely me.
What did we talk about that I can only assume made people unbelievably horny all the time?
Like I'm, that's what I think I'm clueing into the context clues of what this sentence
is getting at.
I know we probably are the sexiest sport program on the internet, but at the same time
I don't understand what we talked about that made people horny.
Unless it's just the power of our voices, which I would understand.
To be fully honest, when I talked to this person, it was during the Able Gamers Gala.
And I was so unbelievably sick that weekend that I have no idea what I talked about.
You know this person that I met them through the Able Gamers Gala.
It was a digital Gala where you could like video chat with people.
What did you say to their roommates?
I didn't say anything to their roommates.
They said their roommates for whatever reason do the sex a lot.
Then what possible disclaimer were we supposed to just say, hey, odd winter's roommates,
you knock it off to give it a break wrong with you disclaimer for how much you're doing
that stop.
Yeah, I don't know.
I don't know about that one.
The disclaimer that I initially thought of before you got into the tell my roommates thing
was the disclaimer of do not drive or operate heavy machinery while listening to this podcast.
If you choose to do so, do so at your own risk, I guess, and we are not liable for anything
that happens.
I don't see how that would lead to anybody porking all day and night, but no, right?
I don't either.
That was the disclaimer that immediately popped into my head.
I don't know about the sex one.
Interesting.
Well, Mr. Toastman said, Tyler, we the people in the merch eating group are appalled that
you told us that we cannot eat the foam finger.
How dare you?
Why?
What?
I don't know.
So I, are you doing like another podcast with someone else that I don't know about because
I don't know where any of these references are, but I do know that you can buy the foam,
the eye finger sports foam finger at store.gmfst.com.
It's 13 bucks.
You get an eye finger sports finger that you can finger at any sport game.
Yeah.
Did you read the description I wrote for that?
A foam finger like none that have come before with this 18 inch foam finger.
You can finally showcase how much you truly for.
I'm fine with Mark's expert finger foam design.
You too can be on, you could be on top wing at any and every event you bring it to start
your epic journey, sports journey today by pushing that on the ad to cart button now.
That's a great one.
That's really.
I'm sure people that listen only and don't watch on Spotify were wondering what I was
doing.
And then the people who watched it on Spotify are like there was no extra context given
10.
Yeah.
But yeah, apparently so I, I announced as soon as we got, we're able to add that to
the store on the discord and the first response was immediately, is it edible?
Can we eat it?
And I'm like, no.
And so they, so they got upset that I told them not to eat a foam finger.
Listen, you shouldn't eat the foam finger.
That's all we can say and all we're legally required to say is that you shouldn't.
It's not made of material fit for human consumption.
However, to free country, we can't stop you in the process.
But we're not liable if you choose to not lie because we're saying don't do it.
Yeah, don't.
It's not healthy.
It won't be good for you.
It might, I don't know, be toxic.
Don't do it.
You shouldn't do it.
We don't recommend doing it.
It is not made of edible material.
Do not consume.
Period.
Question.
Anyway, all right.
That's all we got.
There's one here talking about how I spoke bad of converse and I'm like, I don't remember
speaking bad about converse.
I just said that I don't like the comfort of converse.
But for some reason, I find like in costuming it always, it always comes up.
And I'm like, oh, that's a go-to shoes for costumes.
And I'm like, it's so painful.
Anyway, that's all I got.
Ghosts have been heard.
All right.
Well, Mark, you know I played water polo.
Do I?
You do.
I've never actually seen you play it.
You didn't go to a single water polo game?
No.
Not one.
No.
I am appalled.
I am appalled.
We were friends in high school and you didn't come to a single water polo.
The only reason I went to football games is because I was in band.
I'm not going to go.
I got World Warcraft to play, man.
I ain't going to be going out to those games.
That's true.
You're a trumpet.
The drum line came one time because that was for senior night.
They played the drums and really hyped up the crowd for us.
It was very loud because that pool gets really, really loud and you know, they don't
have any sound like echo cancellation.
So those drums kind of hurt your ears.
Oh, sure.
Well, that's not good.
But anyway, water polo.
Water polo.
What comes to mind when you think of it?
Water polo.
There's a pool.
Besides me.
You were not in the top 10.
You got water.
You got a ball.
You've got nets.
You got speedos.
You got head things and then you.
That's it.
All right.
Well, water polo.
Now you got no running signs around the pool.
You got what curtained off behind the nets.
You got people.
This is where you do come into mind.
You got people reaching under your speedo under the water and just grab it.
Why is that?
Why you say my eye come to mind when you say that?
Because you told me that people would go like reach under water, grab, scrot and just
twist, just twist, twist.
I didn't do that.
But you came to mind because you told me about that.
Okay.
Okay.
Yeah.
So those are the things that come to mind.
Well, what should come to mind is that it has been voted the world's hardest sport
in numerous different reports and surveys and testaments of experts based on physicality,
endurance requirements, strength requirements, basically all the different things like that
you can categorize sports by like violence.
It ends up being the hardest and world's toughest sport year after year.
What's the second hardest?
I believe they put like swimming up there, rugby's up there.
Ossie rules football, boxing.
Hmm.
Let me go into the number.
All right.
Boxing and rugby are up there.
Ice hockey is also up there and Ossie rules football.
Okay.
But water polo beats mall?
Yeah.
All right.
That's impressive.
That's pretty cool.
Yeah.
So I played the world's toughest sport market.
Wow.
That's why I'm the master of balls and holes.
Well, that and the master's great.
But are there any holes in water polo?
Yes.
Fables are basically a hole and all the people have multiple holes.
They have mouths and ears and eyes and go on, go on.
I need to conference a list of everyone's holes.
Rectum.
Urethra.
Yeah.
Go on.
Don't women play?
Yeah.
I was trying to think of a term that was, I'll just say the actual scientific vaginas.
Yeah.
I was like, which, I was trying to say which one would be the nicest one to say and I didn't
know which one.
None of it's nice.
This is an uncomfortable situation to be in and we're forcing everyone listening to regret
listening to this on a speaker of any kind.
This is the disclaimer for those that are listening next door with your roommates.
This is all very pertinent to what water polo is.
Don't don't turn away.
Don't turn that dial.
Don't change the channel.
I was fumbling with their heads.
It's too late.
Too late.
All right.
Act one.
Oh boy.
The history and origin of what?
No, no, no, let me guess.
All right.
Go for it.
So we talked a lot about various sports and origins.
But because this one is a pool based one, it does.
It could not be ancient history, right?
There's no way.
There's no way.
There's no soldiers that were swimming a ball shaped bomb or it's soldiers swimming
a ball shaped bomb into another ship so that it could shove it in the cannons and then
that's a goal because it will blow it all up.
Just putting a ball in a hole.
Is that what there's at the true history of it?
No.
All right.
But it did start as named as water rugby in the 1850s in Great Britain.
But you don't need a pool to start playing water sports because lakes and rivers exist,
Mark.
Yes.
They played in lakes and rivers.
No.
I don't think they were invented yet.
Not only goes the thing.
All right.
Well, the exact origin is unknown.
It's thought that it evolved from a sport called polo aquatic, a game where players would
use oars on wooden barrels in the water to both move and hit a ball similar to how they
actually played polo on horses, but they'd be on barrels.
It's believed that players often fell off of the barrels, continuing the game in the water.
And over time, the cumbersome barrels were removed and the game began to resemble modern
water polo.
So that sounds like fun because you would have to have a paddle as well.
It's basically polo.
Oh.
Oh.
That's why it was called polo aquatic.
Oh, because you're right.
Oh.
Oh, however, there's a lot of people that do not cite this as the origins of water polo,
but some people believe that led to what became current water polos after they got rid of
the barrels and everything.
All right, fair enough, whatever.
An expert, or expert.
I'm the expert.
An expert from a 1929 article titled Le Watapolo States.
It is possible to think that during the first half of the 19th century, the precursor of
the game of water polo was this polo aquatic, for natural reasons because we understand
that in such practices, the players would often fall from the barrels to play the ball
from the water, forcing them in their evolution to get rid of a heavy and impractical material.
I want.
As they master the medium, they start a game in which they must swim with the ball in the
liquid medium.
I don't want you to say what country that quotes from.
I want everyone to go to the subreddit and guess let's get a throw up and just see where
the hell people think that quote is from.
Because, oh my goodness, that might be your best yet.
Oh, wow.
That was good stuff.
Very good.
Anyway, goalposts were added in 1877, starting in Scotland, along with the first set of rules.
In 1890, the first match between two national teams took place with a Scottish and English
team facing off in Kingsington.
The Scottish team won four to nothing.
Water polo rapidly spread throughout Europe between 1890 and 1900, leading to a number
of tournaments in Germany, Austria, France, Belgium, Hungary, and Italy.
These tournaments followed the English rules created for the game.
Polo was brought to American 1880s, however, the American version was more like rugby in
the water and had rules that differed from what was played in Europe.
The European version was more violent and used a softer, leather, partially inflated
ball.
Is this back in the era where I'm assuming they had moved to pools at some point here,
right?
I'm imagining so.
Was this back in the era of America where everyone had to be naked in the pool?
Because that was a thing.
I don't know.
This is the 1880s.
I don't think you ever had to be naked to be in a pool.
No, we had talked about it on this podcast.
It's some.
No.
Yes.
In American history, there was a time when everybody had to be naked.
Is that anything?
We were talking about Greek history with the Olympics.
No, no.
We talked about the naked Olympics.
The naked Olympics.
No, no, no, no.
Wasn't there a time?
I might be crazy.
I literally googled era in time when you had to be naked in the pool and nothing is coming
up.
So you're lying.
I don't think I'm lying, but maybe I'm lying.
Okay, so they weren't naked.
All right, I see.
They could have been.
Maybe they chose to be.
I'm sure some people play water polo naked.
I'm sure.
All right.
Well, in the 1900 Paris Olympics, it was the initial Olympic debut of water polo, where
Great Britain became the first winner of Olympic water polo.
Water polo was wildly popular at the time and is one of the first team sports ever added
to the Olympics.
Oh, interesting.
Very fun.
The Olympic Games in the early 1900s used European rules.
However, when the 1904 Olympics took place in St. Louis, the American rules were used,
causing only American teams to enter.
It's probably for the best that more teams didn't play because according to an article
in New York Herald published after the event, several athletes contracted typhoid fever
from playing in the pond that was used for the matches.
Oh, well, that's not good.
Is this the era in time when they didn't have a cure for that?
I don't know.
I mean, early 1900s, I don't know if a cure was invented for typhoid or at least not a
readily available like treatment.
Well, but the article read, the water was green and slimy, like stagnant, putrid, and
putrid pools found in swamps.
After the first day's competition, seven of 12 NYAC men were compelled to take to bed,
sick from the effects of the water in which they swam.
Well, that's sad.
I have nothing more to add.
That's just sad.
I'm assuming they died.
I don't know.
There's I have no more information.
Okay, then.
Evolution to modern water below.
In the 1800s, a bladder ball, which was made out of pigs bladder or stomach, was used
as the water pullable.
While the balls were somewhat buoyant, they became heavy, heavy, heavy.
They became heavy and slippery in the water.
And the dark color was hard to see, so they'd lose track of the ball.
In the late 1800s and early 1900s, new materials such as rubber were experimented with, which
made a lighter ball that was easier to play with, but still heavy by modern standards.
Okay.
It wasn't until 1936 that a more modern rubber ball with a cotton bladder was invented.
In 1948, the ball's color was changed from red, which was the natural color of the pigs
stomach or bladder, to then be bright yellow, making it much easier to see in the water.
Water and water polo balls today are made from foam, rubber, nylon, and other synthetic
materials, but are mostly still bright yellow from tradition.
Though other colors also can now be used as of, I think, 2005 FINA, the International Swimming
Federation, allowed that to be used in water polo.
Okay.
Well, that's cool.
So the first FINA water polo cup was in 1979.
It took place on odd years until 2002.
So there is a water polo world cup.
Then it switched to being held four years with the introduction of the FINA water polo
leak, which is an annual tournament that ended in 2002.
Now only the world cup remains cool.
Water polo has been a part of the Summer Olympics since 1900, though the disastrous
1904 water polo games were not recognized as official until 2021.
That was the one with the typhoid fever.
I think it was the typhoid fever.
In the early 1900s, water polo matches were played in rivers and lakes, but it wasn't
until 1948 that separate indoor venues were created for aquatic sports pools.
Gotcha.
Okay.
The first dedicated water polo venue built for the Olympics wasn't constructed until 2012
London games, and it was torn down once the games concluded.
Hmm.
Okay.
So rules and gameplay and how they evolved.
So it evolved from what was its Victorian origins to what is today in the 1870s to 1800s, several
versions of the game so were played, the number of players size of field and rules varied.
There were a lot of different rules that were out there.
For example, in the late 1870s, game consisted of seven to nine players with goals marked
by flags.
However, by 1888, rugby goalposts with a crossbar six feet above the pool surface were used
for scoring.
Whoa.
The brief rule changed when the new goalposts were added in the late 1800s.
This rule allowed goalies to stand outside of the pool and led to goalies leaping upon
players as they came close to the goal.
After several broken necks and broken.
They, they, this is where the infamous Marco Polo rule came in.
When they had to be blindfolded in playing at the Olympics and you call out their goalies
and hope you didn't get a cannonball on your nog.
I see how it's going here.
Okay.
Needless to say, that rule was quickly reversed after some broken necks and various serious
injuries that occurred.
You know, various serious injuries like broken necks.
Yeah, that's, that's awful.
All right.
Cool.
Dope.
Yep.
So the violence of the sport, you know, yeah, really getting into the soul of it.
So Fina then was established in 1908 and the European version of water polo was favored
over the more brutal American version.
And in 1911, the European version was officially docked it as the rules for all international
matches.
I imagine the Americans still had the goalie outside and was just jumping on the wheel.
That's actually how pro wrestling got started.
So that's, that just showcases that it really is a sport pro wrestling because it's got roots
in water polo.
Go on.
If you rearrange water polo, you get pro wrestling.
Actually, no, there's not enough.
Pretty close.
I was actually close.
By World War two, the American version of water polo died out and only official Fina
approved version remained and Fina is now world aquatics and has grown from having eight
nations as members in 1908 to over 200 today.
Boo, cowards, bring back the broken necks and typhoid.
So there's been numerous rule changes, including a recent rule change that just came about this
year, but to go over a few of the historic ones and some of the major ones, 1949 and
before the game of water polo was considered to be too drawn out.
So rule allowed play to continue after an ordinary foul was introduced.
This sped up gameplay considerably.
In the 1970s, the shot clock was introduced, giving teams 45 seconds to attempt to go on
if they failed.
The ball was given to the opposing team, AKA speeding up the game, much like basketball
used to not have a shot clock.
Now water polo does as well.
The basketball.
The addition of a second referee.
Yeah, basketball back in the day.
Have you ever watched Hoosiers?
No, what's Hoosiers?
It's a movie.
It's a basketball movie about its old, older basketball.
There used to be no shot clock.
So as long as you maintain possession, you could win a game two to nothing, just by maintaining
possession of the ball and never letting the other team get the ball.
Okay.
Well, that's interesting.
So the addition of a second referee was added in the late 1970s in an attempt to make decisions
more balanced.
Balanced.
Okay.
Yes.
Good.
Good.
During my days of playing here, a couple rule changes I dealt with.
When I first started playing, there was a seven meter, a four meter and a two meter line.
Okay.
The four meter line was the off-sides line.
The four meter line was the penalty shot line and the seven meter line was if you got common
fouled behind it, they could take a shot from seven meters out from the goal and just
like you get common fouled and you could shoot right away.
That then changed when it was my junior year to being the two meter and five meter line
and the seven meter line was gone.
So then the five meter line both became the penalty shot line and also became the if you
got fouled behind it could shoot right away.
Oh, okay.
And it has since changed now to the five meter line marker is the penalty shot, but now it's
a six meter line for the foul behind shoot.
I am lost.
It's fine.
It'll get explained now.
We're going into the second act.
All right.
Act two.
It's your favorite act, Mark.
Why?
The requirements.
The requirements.
The requirements.
The requirements, right?
Yeah, like a pool.
You need a pool and the pool must be between 25 to 30 meters in length and 10 to 20 meters
wide.
Okay.
The depth much must be at least six feet deep or 1.8 meters deep.
Okay.
However, there are ways that allow shallow end pools to be used, but generally for high
level and Olympic level play, this is not okay.
It rules allow the shallow end generally if a pool has a shallow end because all old
school pools did for the goalie to then stand on the bottom.
They're the only player that could stand on the bottom, but only within one of the
goalies gets to say it would only be one.
Yes.
So you can go in that advantage.
Seems a little unfair.
Milford's pool.
There's a shallow end, but here's what changes for the shallow end.
The crossbar top of the goal must be at minimum eight feet high from the bottom of the pool.
Oh damn.
So that's 2.44 meters in height.
So therefore the shallow end tends to be way higher.
So when you're standing, like even my head doesn't touch it because it tends to be significantly
taller than I am tall.
Fascinating.
So they have to really jump for it if they're able to be on the shallow.
Correct.
Okay.
So there is a bit of it.
It's still not balanced, but there's definitely a bit of a balance, right?
Yeah.
And there's the width of the goal remains the same.
So only the height changes.
Okay, gotcha.
Okay.
Now you need a goal as well for both ends.
Three meters wide by 0.9 meters high for the debond.
That's the internal hole.
That's the size of the hole you can throw the ball into mark.
Good.
Three meters by 0.9 meters.
It's a weird number.
Yeah, it's 900 millimeters by 3000 millimeters.
All right.
Cool.
Good.
And then it protrudes from the end line by 0.3 meters.
That's important for a later factoid.
Okay.
I'm not going to remember that.
And obviously they're centered on the other end.
What?
I'm not going to remember that.
That's fine.
There's markings and zones though.
I'm just letting you know right now.
I don't think I can remember that.
There's markings and zones though, Mark.
Okay.
All right.
Just because I can.
I'm going to share this with you.
No way.
So you can see this image.
I apologize everyone.
I don't mean to make everyone yawn at home.
I have that very little sleep.
Yes.
So this is your pool.
Okay.
I'm looking at a diagram.
It's blue.
There's like a green bar at the top and bottom.
There's yellow bars next to the green bars.
Radiating from the center line vertically.
And then there's red bars on the end of the yellow bars, which are adjacent to the green
bars top and bottom in the blue.
There's a bunch of lines.
There's a few more green yellow and red lines, some red lines on the side.
And then there's some words in the middle.
All right.
I can't read those.
Ball release device.
Yes, that's one of the things.
All right.
So the red line in the red marking area goes out to two meters.
That's the off-sides line.
That is the line you cannot cross unless you have the ball in your possession.
So that once you cross that, it's like the icing line in hockey.
Where if I were the off-sides line in hockey.
We didn't do a good hockey prime.
Oh, go, you shot.
So the two meter line is two meters from the front of the goal.
That's that red area I showed you.
That's the off-sides line.
The five meter mark, that's that X mark on the side in the yellow.
That's the penalty shot area.
Okay.
That's where if somebody has to take a penalty shot, they line up with that and shoot on
goal.
Okay.
The six meter line is where the yellow section stretched out to.
That's where if you get a common foul from behind it, you can shoot immediately if desired.
It is a strategy to play outside that line to get a common foul and take a shot because
it's a free shot.
The person in front of you cannot reach forward to block it.
They can only have their hand behind their head.
Fascinating.
All right.
And then the half court line is the midline.
Initially, the goalie could not cross this line.
New rules state that the goalie can in fact play the entire court, the entire pool.
When I played, you couldn't.
But the six meter line is also important because that's how far the goalie can use two hands
out to.
Any further and you can't use two hands.
Weird.
Shallow in the kitchen because water polo field players, once you leave the goal area, it's
just like in soccer.
You remember the goal box?
How the goalie can't use their hands outside of that box?
Right.
Okay.
That's the similar thing in water polo because in water polo, you can only catch and throw
with one hand aside from the goalie within the goalie area.
Oh, okay.
I figured it'd be hard to swim anyway.
That's why you tread water.
I see.
I can't even do that.
I can't tread water with just my legs.
I drown immediately.
If I was tied with my arms to my sides and I was thrown in a pool, I would die.
Sink to the bottom and die.
I believe in you.
No, I die.
I can teach you.
I don't want the egg beater kick.
The egg.
What?
Yeah.
Egg beater kick.
If I had shoes on, I'd stick my legs up and show you how to do it.
Why don't you have?
What does that matter?
Well, you're afraid to go on foot review dot foot.
What is it again?
We could be off the side.
I can't see it.
I don't have this in wide screen mode.
I can't see your feet.
All right.
Let me run and put socks on.
I'll be right back.
No, no, I don't want to see it.
Don't give people that.
Oh, okay.
Fine.
Don't know what they want.
The ball 2005 FINA permitted the multi color ball, which allows yellow and different colors
to exist.
It's around 400 to 450 grams, which is 14 to 16 ounces.
That's how heavy it is.
Oh, and it's rubber and it's textured.
If you rub your hand along the outside of a water polo ball, it's rough.
Your hand will naturally be inclined to stick to it.
Oh, okay.
That's cool.
And that's so you can actually grip it when it's wet.
There are various different sizes.
Size one is splash ball.
It's most commonly for like teaching and younger ages.
It's really tiny size two is for junior.
It's for 12 and under girls and 10 and under coed.
Size three is the intermediate 1400 girls 12 and under boys.
Size four originally called women's was for 14 and under boys 16 and under girls.
18 and under girls high school, NCA and international women's size ball.
It is regulated circumference of 0.65 to 0.67 meters, requiring a pressure of 12 to 13
PSI.
But as of 2023, FINA decided to reduce the required PSI to 6.5 to 7.5, dropping it in
half nearly size five is the biggest size.
It's for men's 16 under boys, 18 under boys and all other men's.
He double A international circumference of that ball is 0.68 to 0.71 meters and it's
13 to 14 PSI until the 2023 update to be 7.5 to 8.5 PSI.
Now the FINA update requires those to be mccossa balls though.
That's right.
Now we're in the fun part.
Oh, you remember wrestling headgear?
Yes.
Water polo has a similar cap.
Okay, cool.
So you don't get cauliflower here.
Great.
Isn't that only from impacts?
Are people getting punched in the ear in this?
Yes.
Okay.
And hit with the water polo ball that I told you is very heavy and very hard.
Okay.
But they're different colors for each team.
Goellies have to wear a distinguishing color from the rest of their team and they have
those plastic pieces on the side of them that look like wrestling headgear.
Alright, got it.
So that the pooches can yell at them.
Swimsuits.
So people can't reach in and grab your scrot.
Okay.
Swimsuits like speedos.
They can be jammers which are like the thigh length ones.
And then women also wear very tight fitting full body suits because they get scratched
and also pulled on and grabbed and all kinds of stuff too.
Mouth guards not required but recommended because you will get kicked in the face.
I have many times.
Good, good, good, good.
I also took a ball to the face, not the scrot ball but the water polo ball.
Okay, I'm going to try to recap everything I've learned.
We're getting into the people though.
We got one more section of this this act and then we'll talk about it.
Okay.
Alright, cool.
13 players on a team.
Seven people in the game for each team at a time.
Six field players, one goalie.
Okay.
Alright.
There you go.
Now you can do that.
That's it.
There's no positions.
There are positions but I was going to go into that after you do your recap.
Okay.
So it all starts with a pool.
They find any kind of community pool that's been available, doesn't matter shallower deep.
They jump in and then they release the typhoid.
Now you know those chemicals they put in pools, right?
And you know the one that makes your P turn green if you pee in the pool?
Well, it's kind of like that but it's for the typhoid.
So the seven players on each team that gain in ball and elbow drop in anybody in the way.
That's why they got the head gear.
And then they got to swim and navigate through the streams of blowing green typhoid to be
able to get to the other goal and then shoot a shot with no hands that tie behind their
back and they got to scoop it up with their mouth I think you said.
And then they Hoover the ball to their lips but it's dangerous because the typhoid is
flashing around and all the typhoids everywhere so they got to like make sure they don't to
the side that's covered.
You're giving me the worst glare I have ever seen.
And then they.
And is this what happened when I was doing the earlier primers and you know you couldn't
see your face.
People couldn't see me.
Yeah.
And then they and then they swim a big beater style or something like that.
They go over to the other side.
One goalie is nine feet tall.
One goalie is six feet tall because one goal is higher than the other.
And then they and then they move to the other one and they get it in the goal and then everyone's
naked.
That's how it ends everybody's clothes just manage.
Exactly exactly.
Well it's actually no I backed it up it's like a human centipede because the reason they're
behind their back is because they got to grab onto the scrotive their teammate and to be
able to chain up and get enough momentum for the egg beater tornado to be able to send
the ball high enough.
But that's only for the team where the goal is nine feet in the air.
All right.
That is not at all accurate.
Okay.
Well I get points for effort.
You get points for massive creativity.
All right.
Thank you.
So here are the positions in water polo mark.
Oh, you have your goalie.
You got whole set which some people called the center or a center forward.
The whole the whole and then you got your wings.
Your left wing and your white.
You're what you left right right right right right right.
You white wing or left wing and white wing got it.
And then you have your flats.
You got your flats.
Also can be called drivers but we call them flats.
You have your left flat and your right flat and then you have your point.
All right.
So you go your goalie, whole man, left wing, white wing and flats also known as Dweivou.
And then you have your point.
If you point.
Yeah.
There's another person there.
Yeah.
That's your seventh because you have your goalie that's on defense and these are the offensive
positions that I mentioned.
Oh, okay.
I see.
I see.
I see.
And then to match you have your whole D which is your whole defender.
You're holding right.
Hold the your whole D.
Your whole D.
Wait, wait.
Hold on. I'm kind of goalie.
Okay.
And then this is the other team.
This is the other team.
Why are they different?
Because they're playing defense.
And I'll explain how this works.
I'll explain how it works here in a sec.
But you have your whole D.
These are defensive positions.
Your whole D.
You hold your whole D.
Your wing defenders.
Your wing defenders.
Your flat defenders.
So you mean wing to Fwindu.
And flat defenders.
Flat defenders.
And your point to Fwindu.
So it's just the same rules when you put the Fwindu on the end of it.
Yes.
But here's what happens.
All right.
Okay.
So let me explain these positions first.
Okay.
All right.
Your goalkeeper.
This is this is a person you want that's got high tread capability.
They got fantastic reaction time.
They're a lanky.
They got a giant arm span.
You know, like me.
The arms.
Stop flapping.
I don't like.
There's only player allowed to lose both hands or a clenched fist to control the ball.
Or a clenched fist.
That doesn't make any sense.
Why is there a fist so clenched?
They can punch the ball, Mark.
They can do your punchy ball.
Uh huh.
Got to watch out for the whole man right in front of the goalie.
His fists are tight and ready to fight.
Now that's not the whole man.
The whole man can't use fists.
No, but he's got to watch out for the goalie's fists.
They fall in the big arms.
They're like, they're like elastic girl.
Damn.
Exactly.
They're your quarterback in water polo.
They're the ones who are calling out the defensive positions.
They're calling out where the ball is.
They're calling out what to do.
They are the jet field general on the defensive side of the court and they are the quarterback
on outlet passes.
They're the ones who will throw the deep ball to get fast breaks.
goalie.
goalie.
That is what I played.
I was an all state honorable mentioned goalie.
Wow.
All state honorable mentioned.
You think that the goalie of the team that won would have been the one to get the goalie
I wasn't the goalie for when we won state.
I didn't play goalie that year.
I moved to field.
Uh I see.
I played whole D.
He played a whole D.
That's why he's the master of ball.
All and the holes.
It all makes sense.
All right.
Now you're center or your whole set your whole set your whole set.
This is your big muscular dude.
This is the man that you nobody can drown.
He's the one who can wrestle.
He's big.
He's strong.
He's fast.
He's mobile.
He can throw people into the goal with the water polo ball.
What the fuck.
They are big.
Uh they are strong.
They tend to be long.
They need agility and accuracy.
But they're the ones that can quickly control the ball and be able to turn a person and the
ball to try and score a goal from directly in front of the goal.
They're generally the the most powerful offensive position in water polo.
So turn your opponent into a pretzel with their bare hands.
Yes.
Wow.
These these guys are huge.
You know your D linemen that take no shit from nobody in football.
I think so.
Yes.
That's your whole set.
Wow.
Nice whole set.
So these guys need to have incredible scoring prowess.
They need to be incredibly strong.
Treaders.
They need to be incredibly strong agile quick and have great eye hand coordination to be
able to both gather the ball and pass it when needed or turn and shoot.
They need to be able to overpower and they will wrestle for position constantly.
It is a battle in the whole set spot.
Your point is usually the person who directs the offense.
They need to be the most crisp passers.
They are also the person that plays whole D.
So they need to be big and be ready to wrestle against the the whole set defender because
as you swim down down the pool, the way it works Mark is they play in a triangle.
The points at the top of the triangle, the flats are at the second two points.
The wings are at the side and the whole set is in the middle.
That's how an offense works.
It's like that triangle golf tee game from Cracker Barrel.
Correct.
And so it's just a matter of skipping in the right order to be only left with one.
No.
If you're left with three, you're an eejit.
If you're left with four, you're an Igna Ramus.
If you get left with two, you're pretty smart.
So based on that offensive position, Mark, it's a glance over what you're just saying.
What's doing?
If you think about the offensive position, right?
You have your point man.
They're the closest to your own goalie.
So they become the whole D because they need to defend against the whole set.
So it's like if you shift them down, your flat offensive players are your wing defenders
generally.
Your wing, wing offensive players are your flat defenders and your whole set is then
the point defender.
That way you don't over swim.
You're not swimming like you're minimizing the amount each player on your team has to
swim from their offensive defensive position.
They will rotate based on different things that happen, but that's how that works.
Your flat offensive players are generally fast swimmers.
They're ones that can drive and score.
They have great, great passing capabilities.
The points and flats are generally your best passers.
They need to be able to pass the ball, move the ball around really easily, catch and throw
the ball with one hand, keeping it dry.
When you set the whole set, you get a wet pass, which means it lands in the water in front
of them.
And then your wing defenders, your wing players are also generally your breakaway players.
They need to be fast.
They're the ones that get the deep pass.
They're like the J'Mar chase, right?
They're streaking down the field so the goalie can throw an outlet pass to them so then they
can get a fast break goal.
Okay.
J'Mar chase is a wide receiver.
That is correct.
All right.
So that is the positions in water polo.
Act three.
It's game time.
HUH!
HUH!
What?
I'm cheering.
That was cheering.
Oh, you said hello.
HUH!
HUH!
All right.
The game begins the first quarter, eight minutes in length.
The referee blows the whistle as both teams must get in position, divide it evenly.
Three on one side of goal, three on the other side of the goal and the goalie in the center.
The ball is floating in the middle of the pool, held by a release thing that keeps it
centered.
The ball release device!
The ball release device, that's correct.
The whistle is blown and the swim off commences.
First team to get to the ball and pass it to their own team gets first position.
The race continues.
They drive down.
They get in their positions.
They pass from the flat to the other flat to the point to the wing.
They run a spin wheel.
The flat man drives down.
This whole set back doors out by backpedaling to the other wing.
The wing floats up to the flat position.
They pass it in and he scores a goal.
WOO!
What happened?
A goal was scored.
They reset.
Now they're on each other's halves at the center of the pool.
They're on each other's halves?
Yes.
One team is on their half towards their goalie.
The scoring team.
Oh, I've had that.
No, no, no.
The team that just got scored on has the ball.
The whistle is blown to restart game.
The clock has stopped every time a goal is scored.
The whistle is blown to restart.
The clock restarts.
They pass the ball back.
They move down into their positions.
So each quarter restarts with that swim off.
Shot clock is 35 seconds.
Okay.
It's 30 seconds in international play.
35 seconds in high school.
So 30 seconds shot clock.
Okay.
Oh no, the ball hit off somebody's hands and went out of bounds.
The clock stops.
But who gets the ball?
So when the ball goes out of bounds, the defending team gets the ball.
If it was untouched by the offensive team and they throw it and it goes out of bounds.
Either on the sideline or the end line.
But on the end line, if the defender blocks it, that's not the goalie and it goes out
over the end line, the offensive team retains possession.
No, that's the goalie.
If it goes out, if it's blocked by a defender and it hits off a defender, that's not the
goalie and goes over the end line, the defense gains possession of the ball.
But if it's knocked and tipped out of bounds over the end line, which is behind the goal,
the offense retains possession and gets the ball on the two meter line on the sideline
and can immediately start play, can shoot right away and pass and shoot anything.
And every time the ball goes out of bounds, until the ball comes back in bounds and plays
restarted, the clock is stopped.
Now, they're battling it out.
They throw the ball into the whole set and a whistle is blown there.
They kicked out the guy who was defending him.
He was pulling on his suit.
He was punching him in the face.
He was reaching in and grabbing the scrotin squeeze in.
But the ref's on.
So he's kicked out.
Christ, no, do they have a ref underwater?
Do they have a scuba ref?
Do they have cameras underwater in Olympic play?
They show what happens in the water.
Yes, but the ref's on see it.
It can't be that interesting to watch or maybe it's fascinating to watch.
It's fascinating.
They're punching each other.
They're using pressure points.
They're doing all kinds of stuff.
They're using pressure.
They use code.
Oh my God.
I did in the state championship game.
I'll tell you this.
I made the, you know, the, the break-o artery here in the bicep?
Sure.
So I was squeezing that guy's bicep the whole game because he was twice the size of me in
state and made his arms go numb to where he started fighting me.
Great.
Good.
Well, he couldn't because his arms were limp noodles and he was just trying to slap you
with this limp arm that he couldn't.
Yep.
Let's say we both got kicked out because the ball was on the other side of the court and
there was just this churning water and battle happening.
They're like, you get out of here.
I remember what I was throwing and I pulled the bones right out of someone's arms.
He never saw it coming.
Couldn't throw with no bones.
Ah, good times, good times.
So a kick out is like a penalty box in hockey.
It gives the other team a man up situation.
So they have an offensive power play.
Mm-hmm.
Okay.
To be able to have a better chance of scoring the goal.
It's for 20 seconds, the player is out for 20 seconds.
Once the 20 seconds are up, they can swim back in.
They cannot push off the wall or anything.
So there's like a hockey where the game goes on without the person?
Correct.
Correct.
And you can have multiple kickouts.
Two people, three people could have a personal foul at the same time and continue the power
play.
It's just greater, greater setup.
And you generally run a four or two offensive man up.
So four or two is you have four people in a line.
So you have one person on each post of the goal to the wing stay there and then you have
two on top.
And you move the ball around the circle and rotate in order to move the defense out of
position to score the goal.
It's a general strategy you play.
Are there any refs in the pool or are they all outside?
They're all on the sidelines.
They're usually a refs, two refs that are situated right on the goal because they make
sure that the ball has crossed all the way across the front of the goal to be able to
score.
And then you have refs on either side that are tracking and monitoring the game from
above.
Okay, cool.
So a lot of stuff that goes on underwater is unseen, but they try and anticipate and
call it.
Each team has two timeouts they can use throughout the game to be able to stop the clock and
do substitutions and stuff.
Anytime the clock is stopped, you can freely substitute players as long as it is a long
stoppage.
So like after team scores, you can switch out players.
Even now you can live substitute in water polo.
The way the arena is set up, there's lane lines that block the boundaries.
You can have a player swim up the sideline and your player swim under the lay line, give
them a high five and then the other person can go.
Is that part of it?
Yeah, the high five is required.
You have to make contact in the rule book.
I don't know if it's officially in the rule book.
I was talking to my coach who's been coaching now for years and years and years to confirm
this yesterday because I was like, that's, I don't, yeah, but yeah, the high five was
distinctly mentioned in that conversation.
That's hilarious.
Yeah.
That didn't used to be a thing.
You used to have to swim to the penalty corner to switch out, but now you can move all the
way up and down the side of the pool to be able to substitute.
Well, that's lovely.
By the way, if the ball gets knocked out over the sideline, the last team that touched it
is the team that is marked for marking it out of bounds like basketball.
So the other team gets possession of the ball.
I see.
Now the fouls.
This is interesting.
The reason I mentioned the kick out is the ejection foul or exclusionary foul or major
foul.
There's a lot of different names for it.
Gotcha.
You only get three of those per game.
Once you hit three, you're out of the game.
You cannot get back into the pool.
It's like basketball where if you get five in college or six in the NBA, you're out of
the game for the rest of the game.
If a personal foul happens inside of the five meters in front of the goal with an impending
high percentage goal shot, anticipated and they use like grabbing on the player's suit,
pulling them back.
They're not playing for the ball.
They're playing the player just trying to stop them.
That's how you get a personal foul.
That's when you get a penalty shot.
Okay.
So those are the types of personal fouls.
The exclusionary foul is similar to the hockey penalty box like I mentioned to do the man
up.
It's the same thing.
If you're playing the player and not the ball, if you do anything that's like pulling
on the suit, pulling on the arm, punching the guy in the face, that type of stuff, that's
how you punch the guy in the face.
See, one of these things is not like the other.
One of these things just doesn't belong.
You know what I mean?
Now there is a common foul that I mentioned earlier.
That's when you just separate the ball from the opponent's hand.
Okay.
You go whistle and it just briefly stops the clock until they retain possession.
That's the free foul where if they blow the whistle and you're behind the six meter line,
you can pick up the ball and shoot it as we call it.
Grip it and rip it.
Grip and rip.
Yep.
But you can also pop the ball, which is where you pop the ball is you separate the ball from
your hand either by dropping it in the water or tossing it in the air and recatching it.
And then you are live again.
It's no longer.
I've lost it.
Toss it and floss it.
Now back to the game.
Game and situation.
Because it's a man.
It's a man.
It's a man.
It's a man.
It's a man.
It's a man.
It's a man.
It's a man.
It's a man.
It's a man.
It's a man.
It's a man.
It's a man.
It's a man.
It's a man.
It's a man.
I'm losing a man.
My brain's not working.
All right.
So eight minute periods.
Whoever has more goals at the end of it wins again.
Okay.
Good.
So you can throw with one hand.
You're treading water the whole time.
You're not touching the bottom of the pool.
You're not allowed to push off the bottom of the pool.
In an all deep pool, you're not going to reach the bottom anyway.
And it's the world's hardest stuff.
Sport ever made mankind truly.
Yeah.
But usually a game lasts like hours.
There's only two minutes between each quarter, eight minutes of clock, but usually each period
lasts anywhere like around 15 to 20 minutes because of stoppage time and goals scored.
And you're swimming up and down the pool, treading water the entire time.
Oh, that's water polo.
That sounds awful.
Why would anybody do that?
It's fun.
It's a combination of originally was called water rugby.
It's a combination of wrestling and soccer and hockey all thrown into one.
You got the balls getting thrown at you at 60 miles an hour plus getting hit in the face,
blocking them from going in the goal.
You got people wrestling and jostling for position.
You're catching and throwing a ball with your teammate.
You're going to be the amount of coordination and skill in there, the swimming.
Oh, oh, I love it.
I miss playing it, but oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
Whoa, hold down there.
Oh, that's not so sorry.
Sorry.
Sorry.
No, but I played and coached this game.
There's a lot more to it than what I did, but that was the briefest overview I could give
of the actual game with covering the history and everything in there.
You ever fall in love in the pool?
In the pool?
Someone grab your screen.
Like fall in and love in the pool.
Just someone grab your scrotin just right away.
No, I've been kicked in the balls.
Nobody ever grabbed mine.
I only heard stories of my friend Riley getting grabbed and he put the guy in the headlock
and was just like slamming him into the water.
That's the only instance that I know of that happening.
That was during sophomore year of high school.
Wow.
Love it first slam.
But yeah, I coached water polo for like three years and I played water polo for three as
well.
Well, technically more than that, college.
And that's water polo.
That's water polo.
The brutal, insanely endurance demanding world's toughest sport.
I am so ready for the subreddit to be all on my ass for how tired I was today.
But I learned some things about water polo and I know this, it all starts with a ball
launch device.
You grip it and rip it and you human centipede your weight to success nine feet above the
pool.
But you want to know what else is exciting?
What?
We are going to meet and have a guest on our show who is the greatest water polo player
to come out of the United States.
Tony Acevedo.
Tony Acevedo.
Yep.
The Tony Acevedo.
A-Z-V-E-D-O.
Yes.
Tony.
Tony.
Tony.
Tony.
Tony.
I will learn who this man is by the time he gets here.
Is he going to be mad?
No.
No.
Okay.
Good.
Good.
So those listening to the podcast, go to the subreddit, go to the discord.
If you have questions, you want us to ask Tony when we have a chance to talk with him.
Please let us know in the discord and the subreddit.
Maybe we'll pick your question.
We will ask him.
Maybe we'll find out what it is that you desire to know about the man, the myth, the legend
that is Tony Acevedo.
Well, thank you very much for informing me of all this.
I apologize for being so tired, but I did learn a bit.
I swear.
You're good.
And one of these days, I will show you the fun times that is water polo.
We'll get in the pool and we'll see how you can egg beater and not drown.
Dude, you're going to see how fast I sink.
That's all you're going to see.
You're going to be playing with Tony Acevedo and you're going to be having a great time
of your late.
Where's Mark?
And then you look down.
There's just a smudge at the bottom of the pools where I've drowned and started to pickle.
It's not going to be good, but I'll do it.
All right, listeners, you want to support the podcast?
Go check out the video exclusively on Spotify.
Go check out the merch store dot GMFST.com.
You want to interact with us, go to the discord, distract ago, or go to the subreddit, which
is reddit dot r slash GMFST.
It's reddit dot com slash r slash GMFST.
I definitely said dot slash dot slash, you know, the old dot slash.
I get you.
Yeah, but go get the pins, go get the new foam fingers and get the posters before they're
gone.
And some of the T shirts because some of those might be discontinued as well.
So hop on those before they're gone.
Get your chance to get something you want and support the podcast all along the ways.
Also go check out Mark.
He's starting to post videos back on his YouTube channel, youtube.com slash Markiplier.
And I'm learning guitar and hopefully we'll be back to streaming soon.
But you can follow me on socials as the apocalypse donor score 12.
Good.
In the meantime, eat responsibly things that are edible.
It's weirdly specific.
Thank you, Mark.
Thank you.
Now go get some rest.
I will.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.