73: You’re a human being, not a human doing

Hello my beautiful people. Long time no talk or at least I feel like it's been a long time since I recorded an episode by myself because last week's episode was with my therapist. If you miss that episode I think that everyone and their mothers and their mothers should go listen to it. It's with my therapist again, my queen, my angel, Dr. Leon. And we talk a lot about body image and not just like oh you know work on loving yourself she kind of goes into detail on why our mind does the things that it does. So it takes a little bit more of a scientific point of view or or take which I think is cool because it helps me understand my thoughts even more because sometimes when they're so unexplainable and I can't seem to turn them off it's much harder. But when I can understand why my brain is creating those thoughts it helps me turn them off. So give it a listen if you want if you've ever struggled with your body image or your relationship with food. Whatever it may be I think it's something we've all struggled with. Comparison, jealousy, wishing we had something that we don't plastic surgery, anything along those lines. Go give it a listen okay. I think it's a really good one and I definitely want to do more episodes with my therapist. So if you guys have any other ideas of things I should talk to her about or we should talk in detail about you know shoot me a DM go to the website and go to the diary entry you can submit it there like whatever you want. Let me know. I have so many freaking life updates some life updates I can't tell you anything about some life updates I wish that I could just pour my heart out about right now but I don't even know where to start. Let's start with the basics. Today is the launch of collection three and collection three's meaning or purpose if you guys don't know every collection I do has a purpose and first collection was all about starting now and taking action like on your dreams and your goals and like not being afraid of what could go wrong and instead looking towards like what could go right and taking a jump and just going for it which was super cool crazy that that was in August of 2022 I think I don't know my days and dates were all kinds messed up but collection two is all about passion which is making sure you prioritize your passion project and you don't get sucked into this trap of doing something that you don't want to do and something that doesn't make you happy because your number one priority should always be keeping yourself happy and making sure you're doing what you love in a world where we're almost forced to do things that we don't love to make money and do all that jazz the idea was to just remind you to keep following your passion projects and never give up on your dreams so they all kind of tie together in some way shape or form but the purpose and the word for collection three is being and that simply means allowing yourself to appreciate the moment that you're in and getting connected with nature and going outside and prioritizing set time for yourself and just prioritizing you in general and it was huge for me because I spent the beginning of this year away from traveling I mean I've still gone on a few trips but for the most part 2022 for me was a big travel year and I don't regret anything I had the time of my life made memories to last a lifetime and I'm so grateful for the opportunity that I got to go so many places and do so many things with so many different people but ultimately that can make someone burnout like I don't have a huge social battery I was drained by the time the new year came around and I was so excited to just be home and be still which is odd for me with my ADD brain and my go-go-go personality and like I don't know I call it my squirrel brain I was so used to always wanting to be somewhere doing something new and for me to find enjoyment and happiness and being still was just a huge like I don't know it might sound silly but like a really big thing for me to overcome and it just led me to starting all the ideas behind this collection to just take it slow and to just sit down and to just understand that you don't have to be chasing something constantly and I think the biggest lesson I've learned in the past couple months is that when you're constantly chasing something well I guess this is a lesson I learned last year but I understood it this year if that makes any sense like I learned that if you keep chasing something you are never ever ever going to feel fulfilled in any way like you are always going to be looking for what's next like what accomplishment can I do next like what can I what money can I make and I don't know you're never gonna feel satisfied if you don't appreciate all the things that are in front of you and I'll go more into detail on what this collection means and how I want it to be interpreted and what I want you to take away from it because I am just gonna title this episode you're I don't know what I'm gonna title it something along the lines of the collection but that goes live I don't know when you're listening to this but at 3 23 well if you're not listening to it today it comes out on March 23rd at 3 23 p.m. Eastern time and with these collections I do a limited inventory because ideally I like I want them to sell out I don't want to have to be stressed that I have all this inventory so we do a limited number of hoodies a limited number of t-shirts crewnecks not crewnecks long sleeves whatever it is I'm selling in the collection and once it sells out you will not be able to get it again I know the last two collections we did like a restock because everything sold out so quick but this time we increase the numbers a little bit with the idea in the back of our minds that we are not doing a restock so go shop now if you're listening to this anytime before then and after it if it's still available which I want to say hopefully it's not because I wanted to sell out because it's so freaking cool when that happens there's nothing that gets me more excited than seeing when you guys tag the moments podcast or me in your pictures wearing any of the collections it actually makes me cry every single time and I'm not an emotional girl like that but it's just crazy like it just makes me realize that through all this social media stuff like we can be so much more connected than we realize and I've also seen a couple TikToks lately I'm getting myself off track but it's like to that sound and it's a couple where like me thinking Lexi Dog is my best friend when really like two million other people also think the same thing like I just want you to know you are my best friends like each of you individually have made such an impact in my life bigger than you will ever understand and I don't think of anything that I do as like a number I don't know how to explain it but like I think of you guys individually and how grateful I am and lucky to know every single one of you and when I meet you guys in person like you make my heart explode and I don't think I'm ever gonna comprehend the fact that I can have these friends online and then just like randomly meet people in the Washington airport or the Baltimore airport like random freakin places like in the bathroom and I Taylor Swift concert I don't know it's so cool to me and I'm so lucky to have you all and I'm not gonna spend the whole podcast talking about that but I definitely could anyways the collection is out and it's coming it's gonna be live today and go shop quick little intermission I'm telling you guys about something new but I'm very excited to share with you I'm sharing with you a sneaker company right this company is called Vessie and I freaking love them I recently started running we all know this and I've been testing out all sorts of different sneakers and I found these Vessie sneakers and I absolutely love them and what makes them super cool to me is that their cloudverse sneakers is like all of the futures of a rubber winter boot and it's built into a sneaker they're a hundred percent waterproof not water resistant they're waterproof so I wear them when it's raining and I have to go on a run or when I know there's gonna be puddles and I don't live in snow but if I did I would wear them in the snow they're also super warm and they have a lugged rubber outer sole that gives you an extra grip in wet conditions and they slip on and off super easy they're also so comfortable and breathable that I feel like there's nothing on my feet but at the same time my feet feel so supported I don't know how else to explain it they also have other different shoes styles for you to try and Vessies are my go-to shoes by my door you can check them out in this link Vessie dot com slash moments for a pair of your Vessie shoes you're also gonna get 50% off your entire order and free shipping to California the US Australia and a bunch of other places you're gonna love them I think you should try them out and now we can get back to the podcast the next thing I want to talk about is the fact that I'm finally teaching yoga again like we're starting small and slow but we're doing it I'm hosting a virtual yoga class on March 26th at I believe 6 p.m. and the tickets for that you can get in my bio and then also after the yoga class like I'm gonna do this thing called an after-party this is all super new for me I'm working with this company called Moment which is so fitting you know considering the podcast is moments and all that jazz it's like the universal lining things in ways I didn't know it could but I'm gonna do this after-party where I'll be live for I think it's like 10 minutes and you guys can just ask questions and we can talk and yeah you can get tickets for that with the link in my bio it's a very beginner yoga class it's about an hour long you can do it from wherever you want you can download the yoga class if you can't do it like right when it goes live you can save it for seven days and do it at any point and yeah I think it's gonna be really freaking cool and I'm really excited to be doing something like this so if you want to go buy a ticket please do so and hopefully this is a good start for me to get myself back connected to yoga and get to doing it even more and get comfortable with teaching again huge step out of my comfort zone to film myself teaching it's just been a long time but it felt good and when I get in my zone it really does come somewhat naturally to me because it is kind of muscle memory and I spent so many years of my life doing it but we're back okay I'm getting back on my yoga wave because it is single-handedly the thing that changed my life and my mindset and honestly I believe is the reason I am the person that I am today I there's no way shape or form I'd be doing any of this if it weren't for yoga so thank you yoga and yeah go check that out link is in my bio on my Instagram or my TikTok I think those are the two places I'll also put the link in the description of this podcast if you want okay what do I have next there's so many things I was in California for the past week doing I'm so sorry this is gonna be like probably a 15 minute life update but there's just so many things I want to tell you and it's so hard to do it through like TikTok and Instagram it's so much easier when I can just sit here and talk to you guys but then we'll get into the good stuff I was in California for the past week with my two best friends with Meredith and Lassette and my mom my third best friend or my first whatever they're all my best friends equally in my heart and I was shooting for a top secret collection that's coming out in May and I cannot wait to share with you everything from this week like it is the coolest freaking stuff the coolest set oh it's gonna be incredible and I wish I have to keep my mouth shut or else I would just sit here and spill everything but I'm looking forward to it and you should too and all that being said oh let me tell you about the Taylor Swift concert really quick because if you remember in the beginning I probably talked about it on podcast episodes in the past like I tried for days and days and days to get tickets like I cried when I couldn't get tickets the first time and then the second time and I was just an emotional wreck that I wasn't gonna be able to see Taylor Swift because I have been a Taylor Swift girlie since the day I could walk since I don't even know when like I wrote essays about her in high school and kind of fell off for a little while like just forgot she existed for a second which sounds horrible I know but past couple years definitely found my girl again and I wanted to go to this concert so badly couldn't get tickets got so angry that I couldn't get tickets so I just gave up on it I was like forget it I'm over it like I'll see enough of it on TikTok and then we landed in California last Sunday and we went out to lunch with my manager and she was like oh I'm going to Taylor Swift tomorrow for opening night or whatever day I was like no way that's so sick and then she proceeds to say oh you guys should go on Saturday after you finish shooting the thing it is the top secret mission that you're doing I was like no way we can swing that Arizona was like a five hour drive but then of course you got me to thinking and we all know you know I'm very impulsive sometimes I'm very last minute so we were in the car driving to just some I don't even know where we were going I'm looking at the tickets I find tickets for such a good price obviously still so expensive but you know I was gonna spend the check anyways and I was like you know what I really want to spoil my friends and I want to spoil myself and I want to do something like this I want to go have fun and celebrate and do something crazy so I booked the tickets and I used tick pics so there's like no service fees on there this isn't an ad but I wish it was because I freaking love tick pic I use it to go like for every event that I ever go to because the no service fees make such a big difference anyways I booked the tickets somehow I didn't know I could use Apple Pay and then I thought it was gonna like need to verify my Apple Pay it didn't so all the sudden the tickets were booked and then on Saturday morning we had to shoot all morning so we didn't finish shooting we didn't wrap on the photoshoot until 3 p.m. note the concert starts at 6 30 we are four and a half to five hours away we book it we get in the car we are zooming to Arizona like no time for nothing we stop at Jack in the box eat a bunch of mini tacos get a box of highnoons at the gas station me and Lissette and they are like drinking a high noon in the backseat my mom's driving us we get there at 7 30 right Taylor Swift so we miss opening ass Taylor Swift comes out at 8 p.m. my mom sees the parking guy and the parking guys like dude I'm so sorry but this lot is full you're gonna have to get on the highway and you're gonna have to drive to our employee lot and then you're gonna have to like uber back or something we're like absolutely no shot that we have time for that we are not missing Taylor Swift come out so my mom's like she's been super nice the guys she's like can we please just try to get in there like we have a Jeep we can park on the curb and he lets us go he lets us go into this parking lot that's full and we start moving the fence and this other security guard guy comes up while I'm moving the fence I'm like oh no we're getting in trouble like the only reason I was breaking rules like this is because I would do anything for Blondie and I was not gonna miss her coming out after everything it took to get there and he helps me move the fence and I was like God is good God is so good today so we park the car in the main lot we are walking in and we find this random bathroom there's no one in line there's no one there we go P we walk in the stadium the bathroom lines are like wrapped around the building and we're like thank God again like if we didn't pee when we did we would not have seen Taylor Swift come out we get to our seats Taylor Swift comes on she performs for like three hours in ten minutes and it was the best thing in my whole entire life like my inner child felt so healed and me and Meredith together screaming Taylor Swift was like the most full circle moment ever because when we were living together in Hawaii we would scream it in the car we would sit there listening to all the sad songs annotate the lyrics and just like I don't know it was so for lack of better words it was so fucking cool and it was something that I'm going to remember for the rest of my life and it made everything so worth it and yeah that's my Taylor Swift story but anyways after that the next morning we had to drive six hours to the LA airport get on a flight a red-eye flight and then land in Florida at like 8 a.m. and it was so draining it took me a second to get my life back together and regrouped which is why this episode is coming out on a Thursday instead of Monday because one I thought I was going to record an episode while I was in California I don't know when I thought I was gonna have the time or the energy for that because I definitely didn't and two because it took me a few days to just recuperate and get my life back on track and now we're here and I do feel at peace and this all leads me into what it is that I actually want to talk about in this week's episode which is how to be a human being and less of a human doing I've had a couple people ask me like my brother and just specifically males in my life they're like what does that even mean well if you don't know what that means it simply means that society has taught and I've definitely touched on this before many times society has taught us that we have to be go go go and do do do and if we're not doing we're failing and if we're not chasing the next goal or accomplishment we're failing at life and when we're convinced that that's how it's supposed to be for a really long time it fucks with our mind I'm sorry for cursing so much in this episode but this is a heavy topic for me it it destroyed my mindset at least for a very long time I mean since I was 13 is when I first got certified to teach yoga and then when I was 15 I was doing pageants and I was constantly chasing a goal with that and I was always just being told that I could do so much but I never really had the energy to do so but I spent so much time trying to find that motivation and that inspiration and just chasing something and I didn't know what it was I just always knew there was more and I needed to be doing more or I would never feel successful in my life and I spent a lot of years feeling like that and I can't even say I've completely healed from that thought process or that mindset because I haven't like I'm still a human living in this society I'm still always wanting to chase my goals and my dreams and I do think that wanting to chase your goals in your dreams is different than feeling like you have to chase your goals in your dreams if that makes any sense right society has just told us keep going keep going keep going or fail there's no room for breaks there's no room to take time for yourself there's no room for fun and if you're having too much fun you're not succeeding right and that is gonna mess with all of us so in this past month or but not past month I guess the this past year at the past three months it's March somehow holy crap it's March anyways it's been three months of me really prioritizing the opposite of that mindset right like I've been sorry I keep saying right I don't know where I got that from actually know exactly who I got that from in Mexico with Victoria Paris every time I talk to her she'd always like say right and I loved it and I guess it just kind of incorporated itself into my vocabulary isn't that so cool when you just like realize where you got something from and realize it came from a person and then that person probably got it from a person anyways love how life does that back to the point I've been trying to turn off the mindset that I have to be constantly going and it's brought me a lot of peace like I've spent a lot more time in my life doing things that are specifically for me that no one else is gonna benefit from so I've been going to yoga I've been prioritizing my working out my walking my phone time my just going out with my friends and having fun but without this pressure that I should be doing something else another thing that my therapist taught me a long time ago was too well I don't know if you guys just hurt my stomach rumble but it did she told me to delete the words should from my vocabulary or at least work on deleting it because when you're constantly saying I should should should should again you're never gonna feel fulfilled or satisfied or happy with where you're at or okay with the decision that you made and instead I have just been prioritizing the fact that it's okay to have fun it's okay to be at peace it's okay to just chill out and have days where I sleep in or I go to bed super late or super early or I take the time to watch a movie like my case of this go go go mindset has been really happy on me for so long that I didn't even believe that I had time to sit down and watch a movie or to scroll on TikTok and anytime it was I was just killing myself with my thoughts and saying no like you don't have time for this you don't have room for this because you're not gonna succeed if you watch a movie and like how stupid does that sound right I know it sounds stupid but I couldn't I couldn't get it out of my head until recently so that's really what I'm trying to tell you is that changing this mindset is going to take time and it's going to take training and you're going to have to do it slowly but surely and it doesn't happen overnight but I just want you to know that it's okay to be okay it's okay to need days where you have to reset your mental health we are also women right we are on this 28 day cycle where everything is gonna be out of lack on certain days like our hormones are changing every single day and that's why there's certain days in the month where we have no motivation no energy to do anything we just feel like we need to lay down all day that's because physically within our body there are changes happening it's not something that's always in your control and you have to be understanding of that and you have to learn to work with your body and work with your mind and give it grace and compassion and just be like I keep going back to that because that's what it is like we are human beings we are here to be we were put on this earth a long long time ago to just be animals in a sense to feed ourselves to enjoy our life to relax like that's what we originally were put here to do and you know society does society and we've gotten to a point in life where technology is so advanced I don't even mean to be like so crunchy granola girl when I say all this because I'm not at all I follow the trends of society like I believe in working in making my anyways our original nature is to be outside to be outdoors to talk to the waves and the grass and the trees and the sun and that's what we were put here to do and then society came in and gave us technology it gave us money it gave us all these different things it gave us standards it gave us expectations and we all got messed up and I think that one thing that really helps me go back to being instead of doing is getting outside and getting connected with nature and this is something I touch on so often and a lot of the things I say on this podcast get repetitive we know that but I mean I don't think it's a bad idea to have these weekly reminders because I'll record these episodes and then I'll go home and I'm like oh what I even talk about and I'll forget the reminders that I even said so I don't mind that I repeated every single week we need a weekly reminder at least if not a daily reminder but I want you to go outside I want you to be a seven-year-old and I want you to use your imagination I want you to talk to the stars and the sun and the grass and I want you to roll around in the sand and it's almost spring so even if you're in somewhere that's super snowy and cold it's about that time we can start going outside I want you to walk in the forest listen to the wind blow think with your thoughts think with your thoughts that makes no sense but listen to your thoughts and understand yourself and allow yourself to escape all of these expectations and all of these goals for at least a few minutes every day start with a few minutes and eventually turn it into an hour or two hours we have the time we just don't create the time and I say that from such a place of personal experience I have spent so long and I still do saying no like I don't have the time for this I don't have time in my schedule for anything I'm already so busy and stressed and overwhelmed and I sit back and realize I'm already so busy stressed and overwhelmed because that is the schedule and the life that I've created for myself and there is room there is room instead of taking that hour at night that I go on TikTok I could turn my phone off and I could read a book or I could turn my phone off I could go to bed early then wake up an hour earlier and when I wake up I could go outside I could go to the sunrise and that's obviously you guys know the biggest thing that I've changed in my life this year is trying to go watch the sunrise at any given moment that I can and I haven't had it for the past week and a half and it's definitely felt really different and weird I will say that and like lately since I was on California time change it's been so I've been sleeping in the past couple days but since I'm being and I'm not doing I am shifting the mindset that I need to wake up early and I'm just telling myself well your body clearly needed to catch up on rest and when it's ready to get back into the schedule of waking up for sunrise it will without a doubt and just being able to make that shift has changed so so much for me quick little intermission because once again this episode is sponsored by BetterHelp you know I love BetterHelp with my whole entire heart you know I'm the world's biggest advocate for therapy and BetterHelp personally helps you decide on a therapist that works for you through an online platform and you can do video chats you can do just chatting you can do a face-to-face on a zoom call you have so many different options it's so affordable it is so personal and it is something we could all benefit from we're all learning to get our know or whoa glitching we're all learning to get to get to know ourselves better each and every day and when you have someone to talk to you about all the things you're going through and feeling and beginning to understand having a therapist having someone to talk to you unbiasedly about everything that's going on in your life is simply going to change everything for you and I mean that from the bottom of my heart because that's what I experienced and I have a feeling I don't even need to elaborate on BetterHelp because how often I talk about it but trust me if you're thinking of starting therapy if you've been going back and forth with it I 110% recommend you to give BetterHelp a try it's entirely online it's designed to be convenient flexible and suited to your schedule and all you have to do is fill out a brief questionnaire and you'll get matched with a licensed therapist and you can also switch therapists at any time with no additional charge which is super cool because sometimes the connection isn't there with the first person it takes a couple tries anyways discover your potential with BetterHelp visit betterhelp.com slash moments today and you'll get 10% off your first month that's betterhelp h e l p dot com slash moments I've said it before and I'll say it again I love you BetterHelp and thank you for sponsoring this episode back to the podcast and another example because examples help me understand things better is let's talk about this past week for example I was in California and I was working the whole week on one specific project and in my life I like to have a couple different projects going it's just how I've always been and I believe how I always how I always will be but since I was only dedicated to this one specific project I think a past version of myself would have been so frustrated and angry that I wasn't working out taking care of my body paying attention to what goes into my body I wasn't staying up to date on the podcast it wasn't posting multiple TikToks every day which I know sounds so so so silly okay but when it is my job it is something that I think about it and something that's important to me and I know that I don't need to explain myself I know that you guys get it but I still sound silly in my own brain when I say anyways I wasn't posting TikToks I wasn't posting on Instagram I wasn't prioritizing content I was just prioritizing the project that I was there to focus on and it was the most incredible experience but that being said past me would still be so angry at myself and so mad that I wasn't up to every single detail of everything and I was anyways I'm getting I'm getting off track I got distracted I was looking in the mirror and I have this big anyways Lexi Girl chill out for a second let me regroup my thoughts what I chose to focus on instead this week this is the root of everything is mindset shifts we can change every single detail of our life by shifting the way that we think about things perceive things and view things and I will take that to the grave it simply starts in your mind it starts in the way that you perceive the world and without realizing it we do have the power to focus on different things and I know that it's hard and it's one of those fake it till you make it kind of things but eventually your mindset will shape will shift completely and you won't have to think about these other things like I think of right now I'm in that medium zone where I still struggled with knowing all these things that I wasn't doing and paying attention to all the things I wasn't doing but I also was appreciative of all of the things I was doing so I'm kind of in the middle but I'm working on getting myself to a point in life where I'm only focusing on the things to appreciate and not so much what I didn't do or what I couldn't do but instead this week I focused on the fact that I was doing something so out of my comfort zone and I was giving myself all the credit in the world for doing that because I know how huge it was for me and I was choosing to appreciate the fact that I was lost in the mountains with my best friends and I was spending money on experiences are gonna last me a lifetime and that's another thing like I when it comes to spending money on that Taylor Swift concert I don't like spending money I in the past it had a problem with spending money like I just spend what I make because I don't know I don't like to think about money and I believe you have to spend money to make money besides the point the point is that the new year I made it a resolution to you know prioritize my wants versus my needs or my needs versus my wants and I know that Taylor Swift concert wasn't a need necessarily but I chose to focus on the fact that I spent that money to create a core memory that I am definitely definitely going to tell my kids about and that also helped heal me from the inside out like my inner child was beaming through me and I just feel that little kid energy still shining through me a week later and I chose to prioritize the fact that and just appreciate all of the little things that I got to experience the new people that I got to meet and when you focus enough on those things those doubts and anger towards myself kind of diminishes and I can just be happy with where I'm at I can be happy with being and it's so cool that this collection is coming out now after all of these recent realizations because I think that when I first started designing the collection I started understanding the difference between being and doing but I wasn't applying it to my life if that makes any sense and now I'm about at that point where I am applying it and it's just as the collection is launching which I just think is super cool universe doing its thing once again everything aligns when it's supposed to how it's supposed to and I also have learned from this whole being instead of doing thing that I feel almost more inspired than I ever did when I was doing you know we're constantly chasing these dreams and goals and passions I noticed and I don't know if this is just a personal thing but that I would create dreams that weren't really my dreams or my passions I would just do it because I knew it would work and I knew it would deem me as successful or valuable or accomplished and they weren't true goals and they weren't true passions and when I take more time to be with myself and the people that I really care about in my life I have such a better understanding of the things that I actually love and the things that I actually want to do and I feel more inspired to do those things and I know that if I am doing what I love and what I'm genuinely passionate about it will work out and I will end up exactly where I'm supposed to be doing exactly what I'm supposed to be doing and that's just how the universe works and how God works when you just allow yourself to trust and to be and I don't know how many times I've said being and doing in this whole episode but it is the most important thing that 2023 has taught me and I think that we all need to apply it to our lives even more because it has just made such a change in my mental health and don't get me wrong there are still days where I am struggling and I feel extremely overwhelmed and I get irritated and agitated but I'm becoming aware of why those thoughts happen for me and I'm finding ways to shift them. 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out but I told myself you know God is saving me from something he is putting me here for a reason I can listen to Taylor Swift for longer and I'm just gonna do my best to enjoy this traffic and it sounds so silly and so cringy and cliche but like those are the little things that are going to simply change your life if I would have spent an hour and a half being angry that energy would have carried with me throughout the whole day because that's at least how it goes for me but I didn't allow it to oh and also yesterday the air in that I was running guys I was meeting a puppy there's this dog her name is mama Cita well that's what they're calling her I'm gonna change her name but she's a pit bull that they found on the streets and she's black and white and she looks like a cow and she is the most adorable well behaved dog that I've ever ever ever met and I've been going back and forth with getting a dog for probably a few months now like six months and I travel a lot so that was like my main reservation with it I was like I can't do that I'm not I don't have enough you know time at home to really take care of this dog but then my parents kind of got on board and they want to be babysitters so we'll see like I'm still there's still so many things I need to evaluate but rescuing pit bulls is something my family first did like eight years ago we rescued our first pit bull and you changed our lives and I mean like completely saved our family it's a whole conversation for another day but we owe this dog like our lives and he changed our lives and losing that dog was like the hardest grief I've ever had to go through which sounds crazy but even harder than when I've lost family members I cried that I lost this dog for months and our rescue now is like a reincarnation of him and it's so beautiful and cool to see and I'm not gonna sit here and get deep about rescuing pit bulls but I will remind you to adopt don't chop because there's so many dogs out there that you know need homes and have just been left in abandoned or abused and you know all these puppies that they sell come from puppy mills which is like so horrible puppy mills are disgusting and they don't care about the dogs they just force them to have sex and make puppies and then they sell the puppies for thousands of dollars and completely abused their parents you know a conversation for another day I actually do want to do a whole episode on that because there's so much about rescuing dogs that goes unnoticed or untalked about that's super important to me and like for example our shelter the shelter that I volunteer at just got in 41 puppies from a puppy mill and I can't wait to go meet them but they came in today so let you know how they are and I'll post pictures obviously besides all the point I don't even know where I started that or how I got into that oh yesterday with the traffic and she's an angel so we'll keep you updated if I end up with with a dog just know that's how it happened and we'll see we'll see so many more life updates to tell you about that I just can't tell you about yet yeah just focus on appreciating where you are now and enjoying all the little bits of your life even the hardships and the shitty days and just enjoy okay where you are at this point in your life is is a point in your life you're never going to get to relive I don't yet want you to waste this lifetime thinking about what the future holds the future is already planned out for us whether we realize it or not and every single thing that happens to us is happening for a reason even when it feels so unexplainable and you can't understand it and even if it is something that's so drastic well said always yells at me for the way that I say drastic drastic I have a speech impediment when it comes to saying that word anyways I just want you to know that even if it is something crazy and it really feels like there is no reason you have the power to create a reason for it and create meaning behind it and like I've said before and like my therapist always says 90% of your life is how you make meaning of it the other 10% is what actually happens sometimes life is shit and you have to dig really deep to find the positives in what it is that's going on and when you start with the smaller things another example I had to take a shower in Palm Springs before I had to do a shoot a photo shoot I had to shave everything right I had to wash my hair I had to wash on my face I had to do the eight-girl shower I get it in the shower I start shampooing my hair the water goes freezing cold not just cold I mean freezing cold and I still had to finish the whole shower I think you know a past version of you would have just been pissed I would have been angry but when you start with small things like that I shifted the mindset to oh I just got to take like an ice bath that's actually really good for you and it's really good for you know your heart health and your brain health and yada yada yada I made meaning of something silly like that when you start making meaning of the silly things like that you'll start making meaning of the more important things in your life and the bigger things so just focus on that and prioritize that and just remember that you are a human being and it is okay to relax it is okay to go take a walk in nature to turn your phone off and I know that these are hard things to do but you deserve to just be at peace okay and you deserve to understand that it's all going to work out and as long as you are doing what you love and what makes you happy and you know finding a way to make an income from those things like you're gonna be just fine and I believe in you and I support you and I trust you and I know that God has a plan for you or the universe has a plan for you or whatever higher power it is that you believe in has a plan for you specifically and you just have to trust that and your life will be abundant and I can promise you that so I love you I'm gonna end this episode here but I'm so grateful for you guys always don't forget to shop the collection and buy a ticket to come to our yoga moment if you want again links in my bio and I love you guys wholeheartedly I couldn't do any of this without you and I'll talk to you soon talk to you next Monday also let me know what you guys want me to talk about on the podcast because happy to talk about anything I love you bye