76: Why you should open your mind

Hello my beautiful people and welcome back to the moments podcast There has been so many things going on in my life right now if you listened to the past couple episodes You're pretty much caught up I think for the most part except for the fact that I have a hundred percent adopted this dog and Who would have thought who would have thought I'm just at a very I? Don't know I feel like I'm really growing up this time And I've been saying that since I turned 17 and then 18 and then 19 and then 20 and now I'm feeling in a 22 and I'm sure I'm only going to continue to feel more and more grown up as the time goes on But what life updates do I have for you besides what you already know? I don't know my brother is Having his lacrosse senior night tonight and that was a whole Weird thing for me to process like I had to go with my parents and walk with him for senior night But I'm not the senior and I know that sounds crazy You guys are probably like like see it's been five years get over it. You're not you're not in high school anymore It feels so strange for me and I don't know why and I think I've said this before I think part of it is because I Didn't graduate from college. So graduating from high school is what my most recent school education accomplishment was so it's just weird it's really weird for me and I'm like I'm emotional because there there's no way that my little brother is graduating high school Where did all the time go? but I'm trying not to be so focused on all this nostalgia and I'm trying to really appreciate the moment because When I waste so much of my time thinking about oh my god, I'm not a senior in high school anymore like oh my god Colby's graduating high school. I'm gonna actually lose the moment of him graduating high school besides the point super weird it's also so funny because The week of prom my parents were out of town and I threw a party at their house And I told him I was having a few friends over I had more than a few friends over But then this weekend this past weekend my parents were out of town again And it was the week of my little brother's prom and they threw a party and I was like wow this is crazy It just made me miss high school if you're in high school and you listen to this Please enjoy it Please enjoy every second of it because it goes away in the blink of an eye and I never thought in my life I would be one to miss high school when I was in it I was like get me out of here. I can't wait to go to college now I'd say put me right back in high school and never never let me go to college again But we're all different like there's people who will feel the exact opposite. So it's cool. Honestly I don't know really what to talk about this week lately with everything going on I haven't been thinking about the podcast much everything about you guys, but as I was having this crisis realizing like I don't know what to talk about done. No, no, no I don't know what I want to do. I don't know the next step for the podcast is gonna be I also get myself super stressed out because I have this long running list of different things I want to talk about on the podcast and I will just leave that list running and I won't talk about a single thing that's on there if I can't make it into a Full-length episode, which is just so silly stupid and dumb because first of all Since this is my podcast and I'm really the only one who makes the decisions for it Each episode doesn't have to be 40 minutes or 30 minutes long I could sit here and record a 10 minute episode and call it a day And I wouldn't have to put so much pressure on myself and be so hard on myself And I also wouldn't have to study each of these topics in depth to talk about them for 40 minutes Like I can really just come on here and we just chat quick little intermission I'm telling you about something and I've told you about it before I'm telling you about apostrophe Which is the skincare that I've absolutely been loving and I think the reason I love apostrophe so much is because I'm so sick of having So many choices and so many options that I can never make up my mind I see ad after ad for all these different things to try on your skin and what they're gonna do for your skin And what's super cool about apostrophe is that it's created for you for your skin and the decision doesn't have to be made by you Apostrophe is an online platform that connects you with an expert dermatology team to get customized acne treatment for your unique skin through apostrophe You can access to oral Topical medications that are clinically proven ingredients to help clear acne All you have to do is fill out an online consultation about your skin goals and medical history snap a few selfies in a board certified Dermatologist will help create your initial customized treatment plan and another thing I love about apostrophe is that it's not just for acne on your face You can do your bag. You can do your butt. You can do acne pretty much anywhere on your body It is super helpful and also when you get your stuff. It's personalized You get cute little postcards and little stickers and you know I love that stuff So that helps me give it a shot especially if you've been struggling with your skin And I have a special deal for you guys you can get your first visit for only five dollars at apostrophe.com When you use code moments, that's saving fifteen dollars So to get started just go to apostrophe.com slash moments Then click get started use our code moments at sign up and you'll get your first visit for only five dollars And thank you to apostrophe for sponsoring this episode kind of what I'm gonna do here. I want to talk about Why it's so important to keep an open mind and I want to talk about The difference between wanting validation and needing validation. These were two thoughts that came through my head the other night I started reading a book. Well, actually the validation one came through my head while I was sitting on the toilet at the mall. I Don't know how I don't know where it came from But maybe that's a sure sign that it needs to be discussed and we need to chat about it But here is why oh Also, I got my hair done super fun super fresh. I always feel Crazy I go through an imposter syndrome moment when my hair is freshly blown out and especially now because I'm in this adult Like outfit to go to remember their senior night. So I don't blend in with the high school anyways Let's see shut up get to the point. Why is it important to keep an open mind? So the book I'm reading I got it the other day It's called What's it called? I'll post on my Instagram story It's probably if you go to the read highlight on my Instagram story It's in there, but I can't remember for the life of me what it's called and I'm not walking to my room to check it, but this book basically goes chapter by chapter in A way that is really easy to read and understand and I love self-help books. I buy books I buy multiple books a week that being said I Finish probably one book every two months because I'll start books and then one I either can't comprehend But I'm reading two. I just get distracted three I find a different book that I like better but with all due time I think I'll get through all my books and It'll I'll read them when I'm supposed to be reading them I also don't have a problem buying books because it's it's a way of manifesting that Eventually, I'm gonna have a house with a huge library You know, I'm gonna throw this out there While we get into this topic because it's important I think a huge reason I keep an open mind and I do things like this where I say like oh me buying books is manifesting this or me doing this is putting this speaking this into existence or Creating a path for it to come in my life somewhere along the future like I have watched in my life Since I was in high school all of these things come to fruition and that's why I'm so big on manifesting and if Say your religion doesn't like the word manifesting another word you can use for manifesting is just speaking things into existence It's just believing that things are gonna happen and they're going to they're going to Come to life and you just have to be patient and you just have to let time catch up And when you think like this and you genuinely believe that good things are going to happen to you You're going to watch good things happen to you and you're also going to become more aware and more appreciative of things when they do happen to you and all of this kind of just ties into the book that I'm reading and the book did a chapter all about the importance of keeping an open mind and For me, I tell everyone to keep an open mind. I have Been a very close-minded person in the past if you would have asked me in high school. I'm thinking freshman sophomore year What I wanted to do with my future where I wanted to live I would have told you I never wanted to leave the city that I Grew up in I wanted to have kids there. I wanted to have a family there I wanted my kids to go to the same high school that I went to and It wasn't just like oh because I appreciated it and because I loved it. It's because I was so cocky not cocky just I don't know. I didn't want to know what else was out there. I was just so set in my ways and I Do still think that I want to stay in my hometown and have my kids maybe go to the same high school that I did but I say that now having experienced other places and other locations and I kept an open enough open enough mind to Allow room for trial and error in other places if that makes any sense Where was I going with that exactly? Okay in high school? I was close-minded you also this is like so embarrassing for me to even say my sophomore year of high school for some reason I just had this Negative outlook on people who wanted to be vegan and I don't know why it's so immature and childish even when I say it now I'm I'm I feel bad like I feel disgusted by the fact that this is the way that my mind used to work Because I know I'm I'm just I don't want to offend anybody. This is not who I am now. I've changed I've grown like so much about me has evolved but Besides the point I didn't mess with vegans I was like just because one person stops eating me It doesn't mean the whole world's gonna stop eating me and it just triggered me for some reason like I don't know What my problem was and when I look back on that version of me in high school because I'm sure that there were other things that I was just like believing and thinking that we're just unnecessary and not cool or not nice like I don't think I was ever a Mean girl in high school, but I definitely had a closed mind and I did not care to listen to other people's opinions and when I look back on that version myself, I'm Grossed out by her and I I'm so glad I've changed a lot but I think back to me in high school and I realized that there's a lot of people in this world who are still like that out there and if you would have tried to come to me and have a real adult informational conversational conversation with me about the benefits of going vegan and eating plant-based I would have not physically spit in your face But I would have not listened to a single word that came out of that person's mouth just because I didn't even understand what the frick and open mind was and That point in high school too was it was odd because I had been doing yoga, you know Since I was 13 and at that point in my life. I was super open-minded Probably the most open-minded I had ever been I had grown up completely Christian and when I went to my yoga teacher training I had to learn about Hinduism. So Honestly at first my dad and some other family members of mine were like I don't like learning about these other religions and just because I don't know they were they were setting their ways and It wasn't in a negative way. It wasn't because they had anything against another religion. It's just I don't know they were quite they just questioned me learning about other religions when I'm supposed to be so committed to mine and Since I was so young I didn't really know any better and then I eventually found Hinduism to be fascinating and it was cool because It didn't have to change the religion that I was You know I could learn about Hinduism and still be Christian and there was no Problem with that and there is no problem with that and I think that that's a piece of information that So many people are missing they think that just because they understand both sides of something means they have to be okay with both sides of something or accepting of both sides of something Moving on that's how my mind worked when I was 13 14 Doing yoga, let's call that eighth grade and freshman year of high school software year in junior year of high school I just wanted to be cool and popular and we've discussed this on other episodes So we don't need to get into it But that was probably a time in my life where I fell the most out of touch with yoga I wasn't really going to yoga. I was just soaking up the whole high school thing and then senior year I came a little bit back to my senses. I hope Point is I didn't have an open mind. I wasn't willing to listen and I Think that if everyone in this world put open their mind a little bit more It would be a happier a safer and a more loving and accepting world And I'm confident about that. I am watching Everything that's going on in the world right now between side note Not sure if anyone's political stance or hot take on this like this is again just my personal opinion Can you guys Florida just passed? Rhonda Santez just passed a law to Allow people to carry guns with no permit nothing nothing needed at all and it is just mind-blowing to me because You know, it's one thing to say you don't support gun control and you don't want to take people's guns away I don't agree with it. I understand it. I again have an open mind But who in their right mind thinks it's a good idea to make guns more Accessible with everything going on in the world I just think that's crazy and I just Little news update if you didn't know that that happened in Florida, but it did now where the heck where did I even how do I start that? I don't know how I got to this topic. I hate when I do this give me one second quick Intermission told you about this one before too. I'm telling you guys about hello fresh again And I have been in my hello fresh era. Let me tell you it makes my life so much easier Everything comes pre-packaged all I have to do is cook it and then give me such a detailed recipe that makes it so easy even for me to do and I love it But if you don't know hello fresh sends you pre-portioned ingredients and you get to pick through a bunch of different meals every different week And you can make sure that they align with whatever your dietary restrictions are whatever you're looking to eat you get to choose It saves you money on getting food Takeout going out to eat Buying too many groceries, which is something that I struggled with a lot and it's quick and easy and you can do recipes that are done in less than 30 minutes I know tons of my friends that have been using hello fresh too and any of the meals that I don't make I give to my grandparents And they make them and we are all such big fans of hello fresh So just give it a try especially if you're in college or you just moved into an apartment or you want to learn how to cook This is such a great place to start. So Go to hellofresh.com slash moments 50 and use code moments 50 for 50% off plus your first box ships free I'll tell you that one more time go to hellofresh.com slash moments 50 and use code moments 50 for 50% off plus your first box It's gonna ship free and hellofresh is America's number one meal kit So just give it a shot. I promise you're gonna love it as much as I do now back to the podcast Okay, I remember now. I was gonna go into how Everything in the world right now now. I don't want to say the world. I want to say the u.s Because this is a us problem if you're listening in a different country Consider yourself lucky no because I want to appreciate where I live anyways point here We are at the highest levels of political polarization that we have ever ever ever been and it is only Beginning to get worse. There is a lot less Men in the middle and when I say that I mean there's a lot less people Open to understanding both sides and making logical decisions based on their true morals and values And there's a lot more people Who are so far so dedicated to? each side That even if the other side had a valid point they wouldn't be willing to listen or change anything It just turns into a fight and argument a problem and the situation that they were trying to discuss Only becomes bigger like at this point people don't even care about what the problem is They just care about being right and that's all that matters. I feel no one cares about change right now and I don't really feel the need to state my political opinions But I'm probably going to without even realizing it. So I'm just gonna tell you right now like I am very much on the left my morals and values sit with Liberals and I it's crazy for me because I grew up very conservative not very conservative like I just Let me backtrack that I Thought that I was a Republican because my mom was a Republican my dad was a Republican until Obama then we kind of started making our way whatever it doesn't really matter what my family did It's kind of what I'm doing now. The point is I For a little was so you know set on this this this this this that if I don't know even if Conservative Republican whatever you call it came up to me and tried to explain something to me a Situation to me. I would have been like I don't care. I'm not even gonna listen and Yeah in a lot of cases. I still feel like that I still want to say that but I'm trying to teach myself to have an open enough mind that I'm willing to see where someone is coming from and at that point do I decide whether I agree or disagree and I think that that is a huge problem with both sides and I don't even know I just think that we have We're all so out to get each other right now And that's all that matters that people are forgetting about the actual problems it's just a big fat competition to see who's gonna win and It's just scary. It makes me start thinking like what if we go into a frickin civil war or something? That's terrifying We have to just like get off all of our high horses and just be willing to figure out the root problem And I want to give an example I posted on my Instagram story the other day. Maybe it was yesterday Some stuff about gun control and just some like informational will post and how Ronna Santa's passed this and how upset that he did because why are we giving more people more Access to guns when whatever and I get a bunch of nasty hateful DMs that are like the guns aren't the problem. It's an inanimate object. No, no, no, no It's people who are psychopaths in the brain and I'm like, okay You're right. It's both. It's not just one thing here like it's not just the gun and it's not just the mental health problems and when people say that I'll kind of respond back and be like Okay, you're right but but yours like they don't that side doesn't want to do anything about either of the problems and honestly that side contributes to a lot of mental health problems because they are disgusted by people who want to love someone of the same sex or participate in drag or Do what makes them happy and they are deemed as disgusting and I don't know cut off by their families in a lot of cases No wonder their mental health is not good. No wonder things Escalade and no wonder people get angry and upset enough to commit disgusting crimes it's all a problem. It's not one thing or another and This is just getting slightly off track But I have been thinking about this a lot So it never hurts to talk about it It all does go to what I'm trying to tell you in this podcast episode is to have an open mind So if I if you don't agree with the things that I'm saying right now That's okay, but just listen to them before you shut them down. You know, I just I want to give another example. I was in an uber in Arizona and this guy starts talking a bunch of mumbo jumbo saying COVID was fake. Dun-un-un-un-un-uh. It's they're trying to do a mass extinction of the human population and another girl that was in the car Was like, can we not talk about this? Dun-un-un-un-un-un-un-un? And I was like, okay, I mean respect like we don't have to talk about that Whatever, but I was willing to I wanted to see Where this guy was coming from I wanted to hear why he thought the way that he did and and Not necessarily shut him down, but ask questions, you know, make someone think in a sense That's not disrespectful and not I'm better than you and not I know more than you because there's not one of us that knows more Than another we all know about different things. We have different strengths different weaknesses different thought processes And of course we live in a country where we have the freedom of Voting like we live in a democracy. We're not all gonna agree That's the point of having two different parties or however many parties there actually are you hear what I'm saying? I just think that if we all listen to each other a little bit more we might see some changes and It's just my thoughts open mind back to the open mind if you keep an open mind You'll start to notice that like some of the things people say there aren't always completely crazy some of them Yeah, they are but just listen before you think or think of whatever You get the point now the real reason the more spiritual thing that I wanted to talk about when it comes to keeping an open mind Was the book I'm reading like I said talks about it in the sense that if our brains are Constantly full There's no room for messages to come through whether you consider those three messages from God or messages from Spirit guides or messages from the universe again, whatever it is that you believe in whatever higher power even if you don't believe in a higher power like far brains are constantly thinking about the situation that's making us anxious the thing that doesn't even matter until five years from now the The homework assignment that you haven't done yet if you are constantly just filling your mind with that So stuffed that it's already so overwhelmed up there. There is no room For anything new to come through any new ideas any new creative outlets any new hobbies There is no room for any of that if you keep your mind full of so many things and of course I understand that it feels really out of our control 99% of the time to clear our mind, but what I took away from this Chapter of the book was that we have to and I say this often so this isn't gonna come across as a surprise We have to stay in touch with our inner child because when we think back to when we were little kids Our brains had so much more room for Things to come in, you know, we didn't We didn't have to participate in the adult world yet. We were just little kids so when we watch someone do something we would learn from them and Yada yada yada And then we get to a point where we learned enough things that we just kind of close off the brain And we don't take anything else in and a lot of us are just conditioned to be that way And that's another reason we keep our mind so closed off because we don't think there's room for anything more And we don't think that we need to allow anything else in But kids don't do that they keep a part of their mind open and they're always curious and they're always wondering They're always in awe of nature and of new things and of needing new people and the older we get the more we shut that off so The chapter essentially says Think back to being a child make time to be young and to feel young and make space in your mind for messages to come through Messages that can inspire you to take the next leap in your life or to Adventure on a new journey like I don't know how to explain it guys But when I am at the most peaceful states of my life like when I really am at peace in my mind and in my body and I give myself time to be alone and to adventure by myself and just Enjoy free time and I play That is when God comes through and tells me like this is something that you should do This is something that's when he gives me ideas if that makes sense and I don't want to sound like stupid and crazy when I say these things and I know that I I don't need to justify any of the things that I say because These are all things I've experienced in my life and whether they work in everyone else's life or not Doesn't really matter so much and I want to share them For anyone who does want to listen anyways I just I want you to know that this stuff works and the little things really make a difference And if you are willing to be open to learning from everyone around you You are going to notice a really big difference in your life You don't know how many things you can learn from other people until you start listening to people and you start talking to people and Instead of waiting for your turn to speak You're actually listening and I think that that was something I didn't do for a really long time in my life Not intentionally not on purpose Not because I didn't want to listen to people like my mind was just going and going going going going so much That when I would be having an in-depth conversation with someone one I'd probably be thinking about what else it is I need to do and I how I was going to get out of the conversation especially if it just happens to be some stranger and Or like if I'm in a rush I'm thinking about where I need to go what I need to do or I would just be sitting there waiting for my turn to talk unintentionally the subconsciously and Once I became aware of the fact that I wasn't actually listening to people I made a goal of mine start listening deeper to what people are saying and then It just makes you appreciate conversation more and it just makes you get more in tune with the mindsets of other people and less Locked into the way that you think because the reality is that we can learn something from each individual around us We can learn something from the 95 year old grandma that you need at the grocery store And you can learn something from the three-year-old who's an astroller who just smiled at you There is little reminders and little signs and little lessons all around us and the only way you're gonna be open to finding them and Seeing them as if you open your mind if you create space and when I say create space I want you to evaluate the things that you prioritize in your life. What is important? What helps you clear your mind? What makes you anxious? What fills your mind with stress and overwhelm and in a lot of cases Sometimes this is work in school and these aren't things you can delete from your life, but think deeper than that like think When are you scrolling so much on TikTok that it's making you anxious, you know, how can you create more time No phone no screen time just nature Just yourself even if you're not outside by yourself. No phone your mind will begin to clear and Things will talk to you through the universe through God through whatever it is and even if it's not even if you think that me saying You know God's gonna talk to you or the universe is gonna talk to you if you think that's psycho That's okay But you could choose to believe it anyways like you could be hopeful and you could be faithful and when you put hope into the world the world is gonna give you hope back and I Mean that I genuinely I mean it from I seriously seriously. I'm not lying I just anyways quick little intermission because once again this episode is sponsored by better help You know, I love better help with my whole entire heart You know, I'm the world's biggest advocate for therapy and better help Personally helps you decide on a therapist that works for you through an online platform And you can do video chats. You can do just Chatting you can do face-to-face on a zoom call you have so many different options. 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It's entirely online It's designed to be convenient flexible and suited to your schedule and all you have to do is fill out a brief questionnaire And you'll get matched with a licensed therapist and you can also switch therapists at any time with no additional charge Which is super cool because sometimes the connection isn't there with the first person it takes a couple tries Anyways discover your potential with better help Visit better help calm slash moments today, and you'll get 10% off your first month. That's better help H E L P Dot-com slash moments. I've said it before and I'll say it again I love you better help and thank you for sponsoring this episode What I have next um You know I don't even know if I want to get into the whole validation thing because I do actually want to do research on that And I want to talk about it a little more. I'll give you the quick brief of it basically I Have this realization that it's okay for you to want validation from whether it's a friendship or a relationship or a person like It's okay to want someone to tell you you look beautiful or that they love you But it's not okay to need that you know You should be able to fill that void by yourself and we'll deep dive into it next time we chat But I guess I just wanted to tell you guys in this episode to Keep your mind open Listen to What God what the universe is trying to tell you? Listen to people that you have once deemed as crazy and maybe it'll give you an opportunity to evaluate Why they're crazy maybe it'll justify exactly what you thought about them But at least you listened and at least you took the information that they were saying and you tried to Understand it and then at that point if it still doesn't align with your morals then it's okay to disagree it's not okay to disagree before you even given someone a chance to speak and I live by that now. I never used to and that's just cool. I feel like I've gotten to a point where None of these words could have ever come out of my mouth when you ask me my sophomore year of high school So it's cool. It's growth. We're always evolving. We're always changing and I say that constantly too, but Just listen to people okay, and don't be Yeah, you get the point. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go walk with my brother down senior night and Just keep getting older. I guess that's scary, but it's a good thing. It's a fun thing. We're gonna enjoy it We're gonna embrace it and I love it and I love you guys and I can't wait to see what the future holds for us I'm creating space in my mind for God to tell me what we're gonna do next, but oh This is something that I want to tell you I if you're a South Florida girl We were having a sunrise beach cleanup and we're raising money for turtle rescues So you can go to link in my bio if you want to come It's gonna be in bokeh or tone where it's the same place the animal shelter event was and The thing is for this event It's limited on the number of people we can have so you have to RSVP and you have to buy a swag bag and the swag bags $100 I know it sounds like a big number but 100% of those profits are going towards the turtle rescues And we just have to do that because the event has to be limited and in the swag bag You'll get a towel a t-shirt a sticker pack a bumper sticker What else a water bottle? I'm trying to get some samples from Sun Bum or something cool like that But you'll get plenty of stuff and you'll be able to come do a free meditation will clean up the beach hang out And I'm super excited for it So if you're interested in that, please go buy a swag bag But if you can't come and you want to support still we have bracelets for sale t-shirts for sale The towel is for sale you can order any of it and not come to the event And you're still making a huge difference for the oceans and for our beautiful little turtles and I'm really excited I'm liking this whole event thing that we're doing and Last but not least it's almost getting to the point where I can tell you about my top secret project that I was working on in California Get ready for summer Don't buy any bathing suits in the next month or so because I Got something coming something is brewing And that's that's just that's just about all my updates Also, if you're one of the people who know the podcast secret and you kept my secret on TikTok I love you. You guys are real ones seriously my best friends when I posted that TikTok like kind of Hinting at a soft launch, but not actually soft launching You guys were like the girls who know no and they're like what happens in the podcast days in the podcast I said yep, that's my fam. That's my squad right there. Okay. I love you guys. I'm gonna go have the best day ever Bye