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I'm going to say that.
I'm going to say that.
I'm going to say that.
I'm going to say that.
Everything you just said.
It's just a sound.
I tried to make it.
What did you just say?
It's hard for you.
What did you say?
Hinging in there.
You say it in the name.
There are several.
I know but what did you just say?
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm giving you in the order.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I don't want her to have weird bathroom issues because in her subconscious when she's older
are the sounds and scowls of me changing her diapers or baby.
Every time I change her diaper I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
I'm going to say it in the name.
When I'm around I think the ratio of diapers I change versus the right thing every time I'm
around I try to do my best job.
My mom too, every time I smoze my mom's like also the Carmel is in any 40s a week.
For instance I enjoy changing her diapers because she's slept on her back.
She's looking at me and she says something fine.
She left for me unless she doesn't have like an like like.
When she was little, she's headed disappointed about her unless she's not in a bad mood.
When she was little and you used to change her diaper you used to freak out.
Remember that one time I'll never forget it.
I handed you the baby and I went to pee in the hallway bathroom which is like five steps from Carmel's room.
And you were like oh my, I'm going to get in here.
And I thought that like something serious had happened but like she was little so she farted
and like a squirt of shit came out.
And it just like got on the side of her little changing table and it was like you forgot that.
You had a fucking little bit.
Once you did her on me too.
Yeah, which is like by the way breast milk poop is whatever.
That's like totally fine.
I don't feel any type of way about that.
But it's the.
Real poop is real.
Okay, we've been talking about baby shit for the last five minutes.
What's next?
A lot of people talking about relations.
It's kind of nice to talk about the baby.
Tell you what there's a lot of people wanting to initiate a petition for you to shave your beard on my instrument.
You know, I think that I'm fluttering by.
Oh, I hate it.
By how much people care about it.
Dear Pia and David Aime.
My partner and I have a nine month old daughter.
Congratulations.
Congrats guys.
That's beautiful.
I'm nine months is such a nice thing.
It's a great time.
We are super in love with each other and totally obsessed with our daughter.
However, we both work full time.
Not only that, but my partner also goes to school full time.
And for the most of the week, I take care of our daughter alone while also trying to work from home.
Okay, that's impossible.
So God bless you.
Often it feels like I am a shouldering workload and single parent.
I drive very hard not to let it get to me because I know we both work so hard, but both of us are getting burned out at this point.
And sometimes I just let my exhaustion get the best of me.
I find myself getting cranky snap because my partner and it's not fair to the poor guy.
My question is how do you balance working super hard and having long days while raising little ladies all so much.
That is literally when I say how do I formulate this because this is a great life.
Life beginning with that.
And I'm not saying that people that don't have kids or that don't want to have kids or that will never have kids like will not understand what life is about.
But I think that I really link.
I think I can talk for me and my wife on this.
What's happening to us now at this point of our life as the beginning of life.
Like literally literally we are.
This is the beginning is the actual beginning.
It begins with a baby giving life to another individual and.
It is there is not a secret a formula.
There are few things that helps you, but I'm not going to lie.
I'm not going to lie to you.
I think that what you just wrote it down.
There are so many books about before being a parent and about the time of the gravity and the time of the delivery.
But there is very little about I think we have very little information about what's the after, what's the post maybe.
And what we just described is a very common scenario unless people are not very privileged and have a lot of time.
I recently discovered how pricey and complicated to end is a time budget.
No, like a graph so with such a limited resources that I only and always gave value to vulgarly to money.
And today actually I realized that being on a time budget is the worst thing that can happen.
The worst thing can happen to a partner, to a parent, to a professional, to any sort of really like to every aspect of ourself.
And it's hard. It is extremely hard.
If I can give you my two cents of advice, I think that Little Jester is really what we make a big difference.
Not only towards you, your partner, which it seems already, step one is already you already cautious and a step two is really like it would be beneficial for him and for you to really practice.
The little thing means, you know, like I'm very tired, I'm very mad, very frustrated, I'm very overwhelmed.
Whatever it is that they are experiencing, sometimes it's a word.
Sometimes you take a breath and you just say to your partner, I love you.
Or are you beautiful?
Or when I say something nice about your day or take a moment for yourself
and make your coffee break a little bit longer than you.
Or try to detach yourself from what is surrounding you with simple moments, simple gestures, simple things.
Sometimes I roll around and take a walk or I try to feed myself a nice meal the day and taking a break out of there.
Go on a date.
Yeah, the sum, yeah, I think Little Jester makes a big impact when you are on a situation like this.
I want to say that I want to be aware of our privilege.
I mean, you know, I have people send me like really hateful comments that like I don't understand what it's like to be a mom because my mom lives at this and we always have help.
I also would like Wild War people feel freedom to say.
I also would like to say, you know, it is very challenging to have like a mom, like, you know, living on the in like, you know, it's like a young married couple having a mom.
But I want to tell you this, I want to just say that we are in a position where people are working hard, like, we are at a fucked time.
Everything is impossible. Everything is so fucking expensive. We are all working harder than we've ever fucking worked.
And so if you're someone right now who's like, like, I don't want to tell anybody to not have a baby.
I want everybody to have a baby. What I'm saying is like, I think like a lot of us really romanticize having a child instead of understanding the realities of having one.
And so you writing in and saying this is like the actual reality of having a child.
And so thank you for being so vulnerable.
I also want to say like your.
Also, I would like to say before I forget any past where he just said, and I don't mean to be dramatic and I don't mean when he said the life begins with kids.
I wanted to say that beside the sacrifice beside the whole compromise and beside all what she just described it, what we just said.
Undeniably the gift of being able to create life.
Which is very hard for many people.
The best because it's the most incredible experience.
But I also really want to do a podcast on encouraging people that like are wishy washy about having kids to not have kids.
Like, I don't know why it's like deemed as a failure to not have a child like living on this planet as like a fabulous single person or a person with a partner, but like double income and no child like is also a fucking glorious way to live that should also be promoted just as much as having a child.
Because there are so many wonderful successful people who think they should have kids because it's what they're supposed to do, but didn't don't have the internal incredible desire to have one.
And like if you don't have this like fire inside of you to have a kid travel and live your fucking life.
Like live your life.
You don't need to have a fucking baby.
I digress but I absolutely think that like we put too much emphasis on having babies.
Okay.
What I'm going to say is nine months, you're just like in the fucking thing.
Right.
The baby.
I don't know what your plan is, but at some point will be in either like a daycare or preschool.
And then you'll be able to have hours back in your day.
Does those hours go by in two seconds?
Absolutely.
Even I don't know how you're doing what you're doing right now.
I don't know how you focus at all on work when there's baby at home.
I don't know.
I just want to just say like God bless you and that you're doing fucking incredible.
And of course you're snapping at your partner.
Of course, this is like this is where the practice comes in for everybody.
You have to be able to create some sort of communication or scenario with the man that
you love.
Very important.
Where you can look at him and just be like fucking drowning.
Like I'm sorry I'm snapping at you or like you know, even Dobby day will be like you have
no idea how hard my day was at work and I'll be like you have no idea how hard it was for
me to be here and try to get my work done.
And then he'll we'll get into like a pissing contest like he'll think that we're getting
into a pissing contest about who works harder.
And like neither one of us is like when I go working harder.
It's all just hard.
It's all just hard.
I don't know like why we have this like internal competition.
All of us about it being like you don't get where I'm going where I'm working.
It's all really hard.
So I want you to in the times where you guys are.
It's all about also perspective.
It's all about even even a couple between partners.
Perspective is an important you know perspective in front of you means like you know like try
to understand where your partner is.
And sometimes like the example that you just did is sometimes like I'm back home and for
me like you know put in perspective I don't know my day.
I'm not a home all day and I can use I don't have the comfort of a house you know like
I can't let it down to have a break.
I can do this.
I'm standing talking entertaining people and selling stuff here and there.
Then you look at my wife perspective and she's like well I can't put the job done together.
I can't concentrate.
You know the house always moving parts and the baby.
So it's like already.
Yeah and I'm like you got to leave the house and talk to people.
That's what I meant.
I mean like it's perspective.
No you're what you're saying is so crazy.
So it's like that's literally step one if you are conscious already that you've been
slapped you know you've been very vulnerable in this email already literally like step
two is you try to do that put in perspective things put yourself in issues.
I will suggest you beside the little gesture kind of thing I said before to literally the
same way you write it down this email you just sit it down calmly.
You want to do it right before going to bed together or when you guys wake up or if you
have a moment during the day like we like to do a breakfast together.
You know like to just or dinner when I come back to work my wife is very good at like
everything ready as well as a ride.
We jump in the car together and we go out and we have a nice little meal or even just
being able to have dinner you know it's hard to go out but like even I'll have dinner already
when he's getting home even if my day is crazy like I'll be like you know what I'm going
to stop working now make dinner have us have dinner together and I'll finish my emails.
Like whatever is your time that you guys share the day whenever is a peaceful quiet time
just breathe look at him and just say to him what he just said in this email.
Listen I know that sometimes is like this sometimes it's not me.
Sometimes it's not how we pictured the baby is also nine months old and like they say
it doesn't get any easier you just get a little bit better it just get used to the things.
I remember first when we went out or we were being traveling or we would be with the baby
somewhere something where they go wrong we were like I would have panicking I would have
been like oh my god like you know like moving parts is like the bag something was missing
and this and then the baby now is crying it's upset and we don't know what to now literally
there is 19 months old and she's way she's 20 21 21 21 21 just from 20 months and we are
both like now okay like now we handle everything.
Yeah like we are like so chill but we are now getting a little bit more used to and so
like I agree with you and I think it's important about what you say about people deciding to
don't be on the path to be parent I actually respect people that you know like feels that
they are not.
I also think a lot of them got to be on that and that in that path I respect that and
I also respect people like you they just are dealing with it and we can't do it.
I think a lot of it has to do with like what I'm learning really intensely is like how
I organize my day so like you have to work and you have this baby and there's no getting
around that right so I just ordered like a whiteboard and I feel like the last in before
I had her and no more than ever I'm I every day it's like fuck like there are how many
things didn't I get done and I'm just like in quicksand and like I can't get above it
and now I and I'm necessarily posting all these like tips on fucking TikTok but like
making up starting your day with your feet flat on the ground deep breaths intentions
what is my day gonna be like today even just having a moment to do that before you grab
your kid is like really grounding really helpful and the night before you go to bed you should
look at all the things you need to accomplish that day if your kid has a nap schedule like
actually add into your calendar from this time to this time I'm gonna do this from this time
to this time I'm gonna do this from this time to this time I'm gonna be with the baby from
this time to this time and like cut off all distractions like phone is out of the room
whatever do whatever you need to do to like plan out your day and accomplish those tasks
that's what I'm doing and what I've been doing and it's been really helpful because I've just
felt like I'm in quicksand and I can't accomplish anything and the kids fucking then like as
soon as they put her down for a nap it's like two seconds later she's awake but like if I
say okay if she's going down at one and she wakes up at three and these are the two hours
I have I'm literally like I put my headphones in I put on distracting music and I it's go
time for the task that is my priority to get done during her nap time so it's like an
annoying like my our response my response to everything you're saying is connect with
your partner more which sounds impossible but being very vulnerable with him and like
you know just like fuck this is hard for both of us I'm sorry if you can sneak in some
sex I having sex just releases so much fucking tension and resentment I mean what it does
for us chemically it's just like there's science behind it you just feel better all around
if everyone's having some fucking orgasms so if you can find time to connect and love
up on your man it's exponentially better than not on top of that if you can get the
most work done out of your day by adding routine and tasks and to do lists and whatever
organizational skillset that needs to come into play here so at the end of the day instead
of being like fuck I'm drowning and I didn't get anything done you have more of a like
fuck yeah look what I got done today I'm gonna pour myself a glass of wine figure out our
dinner plan and when your man comes home at least maybe like some of the time you have
a more empowered perspective to approach him when he gets home instead of a resemble perspective
because your day was really tough that has every chance of like flipping things into a
more positive direction this is literally the evolution of the species yes I know every
time I think about yeah it is I guess all these like I think how people were living like
50 years I mean my father my mother like yeah in this a lot more to pan this podcast
is sponsored by better help getting to know yourself can be a lifelong process especially
because we're always growing and we're changing constantly I mean if I think about where I
was two months ago one year ago five years ago I was very different and therapy is all
about deepening your self-awareness and understanding because at times we don't know what we want
or why we react the way we do until we talk through things I mean no matter how what I've
noticed is like no matter how much I'm changing I still feel like I'm hitting the same walls
and that's really me right that's something that like I need to unwind and that is why
I look forward to my weekly session of therapy so much I just hang up that call I close my
computer and I'm feeling like a million bucks that is why I love better help it connects
you to a licensed therapist you can take you on that journey of self discovery from wherever
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get to my appointments logistically because one time I moved one time my therapist moved
and at the time therapists were not willing to just like hop on a phone call which is crazy
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Okay hi Pia and Domine.
I guess my question is more for you Pia I'm having a hard time not being resentful about
my partner smoking and I wonder how you mentally approach it with Davi day for me and it's
really easy to go down the whole of why do we even spend so much money on all these gorgeous
organic produce these expensive non toxic cleaning products fancy supplements and vitamin
drips if you're going to turn around and do one of arguably the most preventable and
improving cancer causing things I just love him so much I hate what smoking does to your
body it fills me with worry for future health I know it's a cultural thing and it's the European
thing and the 80 20 ratio rain supreme but I mean I can't get over this one any suggestions
I had a dad who was a smoker and my mom has never smoked a cigar in her life not with
a single puff always hated it always thought it was disgusting I always thought it was
disgusting as soon as I was a teenager and could steal his cigarettes I would every time
I get drunk and smoke a cigarette which I did constantly in my 20s I think about what
I'm doing to my body I it's like almost the perfect question to ask me because I'm right
in the middle like I don't know what to tell you.
My dad had emphysema he dropped dead at 74 the hard part for someone like David A which
I know he's going to say is like here's what I think the issue is this is from my perspective
we're not in Europe like so many people in fucking France and Italy live to be fucking
old and there's a million different factors in this which is these are you know every
blue zone is like these are community based people these are people that are connected
to their neighbors that feel a sense of belonging to a community that feel a sense of righteousness
that feel like doing good is like positive effect on the people around them that eat
these foods that are not treated with these chemicals that are breathing this air that
does this blah blah blah blah and everything is a moderation like so if these people whenever
outlier smoking all those things that you're living in person no the food that you eat here
a dovey day is I've watched you all the community all the community things and all that yeah
we're people who love to be connected to people and listen I think this is more a question
for you and I think that you're a cigar smoking bother to collate this it's a I was about to
say I think the answer to be articulated intensely I was a cigarette smoker actually I wasn't
then I got into cigarettes and an old rage and what is smoke today is what kind of put
me out of smoking cigarette like a cigar smoker the difference between smoking a cigar smoking
a cigarette is way less you know cigarettes are more a frenetic thing like I'm side of
everything and use my consider when you're you know like for me was more of whenever
he wasn't a break or 10 minutes or a coffee he was either linked to espresso coffee or
he was linked to like nerve when he was nervous or when I was like you know and today like
what is smoke today the product is more today beside being said I know what is smoke either
is a cigar is a pipe or is a you know like something lighter or more aromatic or whatever
it's actually not frenetic it's not something that is smoking it is a different during the
day smoking what is smoke as a different pace it's a different thing that being said I'm
not justifying my I mean it's still tobacco it's still tobacco and it's not good for you
but I'm trying to say is that as much as she's mad about it and as much as she gave me hard
time about it she doesn't understand what they're representing my life so like you know
I think I think they are this part is for the smoker to just accept it and say okay you
know what I'm going to realize I'm going to understand and I'm trying to say it's a personal
thing you know my father was a smoker my family basically beside my mother she never
touched a cigarette she passed for an informa she died with an informer cancer basically
the last of six and four of us were smoking and and it's like yeah you know like people
also say that to like a new European thing it's not that in Europe we smoke because it's
is a something that is it's not it's not cold it is but it's not it's like it's almost
that he is smoking is seeing like something that to give a tone to yourself you know like
it's it's I don't know it's very articulated I will not know how to this is of course you
can give it a more sense answer than I can but yes I feel the feel the pain the concern
and yeah I mean it's a whole I you saying like future investment like not that he's an
and I mean you know this is like a human being but for a future like yeah I don't know I
mean it's like when it's like writing a bicycle yeah which this fucking I also have a problem
with like your huge liability on all ends yeah but you can't see to your point you can't
see that as a like I do yeah but then then it's like you're feeling like an insurance
company sorry but no I'm thinking about the fact that we have a child and I understand
you're increasing my chance of being a single mother I understand and it's selfish my disagree
on that oh you think that it's not selfish it would be the same as me tomorrow being
like I'm gonna be a fucking cliff jumper well if when I met you and when I married you and
you growing up with a clean jumper you didn't use that no motorcycles no then you're wrong
I'm never smokes all day long I did like you do now I actually was I just said I was
smoking cigarettes I was smoking cigar and I was riding motorcycle I had the one that I
was sharing I didn't have to a grand for the two I was hoping that my life turned into
an adult you would actually become more of an adult I am an adult I write more
second in a very adult way that don't go dirty bike I don't go super fast on a highway
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faster shipping at bearaby.com to learn more about bearaby visit www.bearaby.com or at my bearaby on
instagram hi I'm sif hider the founder of for right I'm a wellness entrepreneur and digital
creator and this is my show the dream bigger podcast listen I love dreaming big but you know
what I love more actually having the resources to make those big dreams happen and hey dreams can
sometimes be private jets but other times they can look a little something like having the best
skin of your damn life or starting a successful business or delving into spirituality so on this
podcast I chat with experts and thought leaders from different fields about their tips and tricks on
doing exactly that remember to subscribe we drop you up to so it's every Tuesday so see you then
dear pant and dummy just short of one year ago today my now ex-boyfriend of five years broke up
with me over a face time and out of nowhere to say that my soul shattered in two million pieces
would be the biggest understatement of the century I liked everywhere for solace it was readily
available yet impossible to internalize I wrote the two of you in hopes of finding some relief
and through your sincerity and humor I got exactly that oh my god I thought this was a question but
this is a thank you you both told me that this next phase my life would bring me something else
and then I should take the risk of letting him go I can say I love this is a following up thank
you thank you thank you thank you and I've never been happier my entire life than I am today
well this is a follow up I also love that you like I love it that you first I mean you just
I'm last minute read this I never read the questions beforehand ever I never have it's true it's true
it's true that's a real thing we never have to be freestyle yeah we never
like you can tell that we never we should
I'm proud of myself for holding space to grieve and learn in oh I'm sorry but this is the beauty of
that I'm proud of myself for holding space to grieve and to lean into every emotion I felt
and has been incredibly challenging year and somehow I'm able to look back and smile
thank you from the bottom of my heart for being just a tiny fraction of the reason I'm still standing
through the survive I love this like a little kid you know what I'm ending it here this is
wonderful ending on a problem I would like to say also something I also like to announce like
I remember now actually and if it wasn't that way but I remember saying that if somebody lives you
like to be a facetime then you didn't lose that much
you know I love what he just did it thank you for sharing that with us
and I will also like to encourage encourage encourage is a very cool new way to pronounce
and encourage everybody to do more of following up I think that should be like with the question
the Q&A and all that we should also have some following up moments like we should really
invite our listener to we get some follow-ups we get a we get some messages also about how
awful I am so I didn't really want to encourage a lot of people to write in about anything extra
because they can be used against me in a really intense way okay
I like to close a list for that
what I'm saying
I'm waiting for the
this is my favorite this is my favorite part of sing I know but
let's go thank you for having me by the way
okay it's really loud it was a pleasure
it was a kid remember when the radio used to just to stop the sound of what it just like
they were just like lower down the door
thank you for having me thank you for coming to our bedroom with all of our animals in your
robe are you gonna sleep in your robe again you slept in your robe last night and I felt very
comfortable did you I get so hot when I sleep in my robe I do too but last night for some reason
I felt cold our bedroom for the record ever has no insulation we have single paint it's very
California is a very California country we have a house on my dad in the summer very cold
the way my dad built his house in the biggest way possible in the cheapest way possible so
we have single paint windows and no installation in any of the walls and the walls are big and they're
just right here to the elements and when it rains the little house floods and a storm is coming
love you
and that ladies and gentlemen concludes this week's episode of everything is the best
I hope you enjoyed it please rate review subscribe all that stuff maybe leave a comment
but remember shitty comments are for shitty people go ahead and follow me on instagram at
pia baron genie and I hope you have a fabulous fabulous rest of your day love you tao
please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products
and services individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products
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