676 - FETISH FRIDAY: Kenzie and Kelsey on Kenzie Coming Out as a Lesbian Trans Woman

Oh, hi, it's Zach Peter, your new favorite pop culture guru, serving you the hottest tea three times a week from the latest news on the Real Housewives, deep dives into celebrity legal scandals, unfiltered combos with your favorite stars, and of course, the latest from Vanderpumpland, I've got you covered, and new episodes of the podcast are now available in video on Spotify, and they don't just let anybody do video. But this platinum blood has won them over. But if you want the latest news from the ultimate tea spilling professional, tune in to No Filter with Zach Peter, that's No Filter with Zach Peter on your favorite podcast app now. Welcome to the strictly anonymous podcast conversations with online strangers. We place ads online, Craigslist is definitely the gift that keeps on going. You can't not do it, the temptation is just too much for real time. Does your friend know that you're banging her? No, it's no idea. And anything goes. 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That's where people get really naughty. There's a lot of x-rated stuff over there. I don't take part in that, but that's basically a forum for my listeners to go in and share stuff. You could do whatever you want over there on my Discord. You get access to that as well. If you're a cross-dresser or you're into pantyhose, you get exclusive content, and you get one episode a month, but you get everything back, everything that I've done in the past a couple of years, so there's like hundreds of exclusive episodes as well on there. So it's a really good deal. Patreon.com slash strictly on his podcast, the links to that is in the description. Today I have on both Kelsey and Kenzie. I love their story, you're going to love it. There's a lot to it. Okay, there's like a lot of backstory, really what they wanted to call in and talk about is how Kenzie just came out as transgender to her wife, Kelsey. And of course we go all the way back when did Kenzie start to realize that she was trans and started with a little bit of cross-dressing. We go back to when that started, how her family felt about it because she got caught, her background where she came from because it turns out that Kenzie had a crazy life and she really acted out a lot. She had a lot of stuff put on her when she was little, she wound up in jail a bunch of times. And when she came out of jail one time, she met Kelsey. I mean, it's a kind of interesting story how they met. Kelsey has a backstory herself. She had just become sober when she met Kenzie. They're very lucky. They fucking met each other. Kelsey is pretty amazing, okay? She didn't know everything from the get-go about Kenzie. There wasn't until recently that she really fully realized she was transgender and wanted to go down that route. She literally came out seven days ago to Kelsey as well as everybody else and she talks all about that and Kelsey jumps into like how did she feel? And she found out different things about Kenzie because the first Kenzie did admit that she was into wearing women's clothing and then she was dressing and then she was gender fluid and then she finally came out as trans and she talks about that whole process. Kenzie talks all about how she felt about the whole process. She's super cool. Let me tell you, you're going to be jealous of Kenzie that he met Kelsey because she's pretty spectacular. We get into their whole backstory. She also came out to everyone in their families and we talk about how the reaction was. This is very new. This is a couple I want to talk to a year from now and see where they're at because literally like I said, she just came out this past week and then came out to everyone and pulled the band-aid off. It's super interesting to hear her story. She talks also about where she wants to go as far as transitioning. So anyway, I have pictures of them. They sent me some pics. I have them over on my Patreon. Links to that is in the description, but I'm going to be right back on with Kelsey and Kenzie. Hi, Kelsey and Kenzie. Welcome both of you. You're both on today to the Strictly Anonymous podcast. How are you guys doing? Pretty decent. Well, listen. Yeah. I'm doing pretty good. Okay. So listen. This is very... A little nervous about being on the show. I love it. Okay. Listen. You guys, this is like something very new in your relationship. Okay. Well, I'm not talking to you three years down the line. Kenzie. Okay. Just came out. I mean, this is your guy's story. Like, Kenzie just came out to Kelsey as being transgender. Correct. I mean, you know, I need the whole backstory, but that's like where you're at right now. But this just happened, right? Yeah. I mean, it's been eight days. Wow. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Let's leave up to eight days ago. Okay. How long you guys married? You know, what was your deal before, Kenzie? Like, how much did Kelsey really know? Let's get the whole story. I don't know who wants to start. Yeah. So we've been together eight years. And let's see. She started cross-dressing like two years ago, probably. Yeah. And then she started identifying as gender fluid. And then last week sort of progressed to the point where she told me she was a woman. Well, let me ask you this, Kenzie, because I have talked a lot of cross-dressers. I mean, most of the time, cross-dressing starts really early on. When did it start for you? Well, even in school, I was always like a really high-percentive kid and didn't really have many friends in things of that nature. But the first memory that I can, well, remember, is I was like 12 years old. And I had taken some of my mom's underwear and like one of my sister's shirt and I put them on. And I think it's probably different for most people. But for me, it was never really like a sexual thing. It wasn't something that I did like putting on women's lingerie and fantasizing about it and jerking off. It was just more of like a comfortability thing, I think, for me. That's interesting. Yeah. I just felt like more like myself, I guess. More comfortable in my own skin. My stepmom, I think I was 14 years old, was changing my bed for me and she had found like my stash of girl clothes that I had accumulated over the last few years in between my box spring and my mattress. So it's been going on, I'm 36 now, so it's been going on for quite a while. Yeah. How did she react? I'm really curious about that to know what she actually ever did do, right? Because when I came out to my father, he was just kind of like, well, make sure this is what you want to do. He's not very supportive at all. And I told him, I said, because he's not married to her anymore. I said, well, why don't you call her and ask her about it. I'm not sure if she ever told you or she just kind of made me feel like shameful about it and was like, well, I promise I won't tell your father like I don't want to do that to him. Like I was doing something to him. Yeah. Terrible. And she's right there is so terrible to say because what is that she's saying so much in that sentence. That's really bad. Yeah. Well, and she took Kenzie's clothes away and basically said, if you want them back, you have to tell your father that they're yours. Yeah. Terrible. I hear these kinds of like awful stories, you know, all the time. But I feel like her saying, I'm not going to do that to your father. It's really saying like, I care more about the way he feels than you. I mean, it's like it's terrible. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So I mean, how confusing was that for you at that time? I would assume super confusing. Yeah. It was always very, very, very confusing for me because I grew up in a super conservative kind of Christian household and so like learned a lot to I'll do the air quotes. I know you can't actually see listen to secular music and everything like was really locked down and monitored my whole life. So it's just it was it was shameful to be honest. I was taught that that it was something that was shameful that anybody who was gender queer or just queer in general, anybody who that belonged to the LGBTQ plus community was just not okay, that it was a sin that you would go to hell to. Yeah. Funny, right? You really think about it. But when you're young and you don't really understand you, it's like, it's, it's horrifying. You get older and you're like, this is the dumbest shit who believes that is so weird. If you really think about it, if you have like a, your own brain, it doesn't make any sense, right? And it's, it's crazy, especially like who would pick that if they, if they had to, but let me ask you this because you said, you said before, like I never had really that many friends and stuff, do you feel like it was a big part of not feeling comfortable as a person? No, I don't think that's, that's what it was. I was, I was really off the walls and like just really, really sensitive and would give anybody anything. So I got picked on a lot and looking back, like obviously used a lot from, from people, but it was just kind of one of those things where I was just totally off the walls, like really bad ADHD, but I always was very sweet. I always had a, a big heart and then so also I, I think that my social, emotional development was definitely stunted because instead of regular school, I was homeschooled in a church basement. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. So, so you miss out on that whole, how to kind of resolve things and keep long term friends and, and it's something that I've struggled with, even in my early 30s. Yeah. Of course. I have a kid. I have a son and he's seven and I'm sorry, but like weird kids had, we have weird parents. I mean, they're not born weird. You know what I mean? Like it's seriously. Yeah. A lot of parents do their kids are real fucking to serve us. I see it all the time and it's sad because how are you going to learn to be social and make friends if you're at home all the time? I mean, it's crazy. Sorry, homeschoolers, let your kids fucking go out in the real world. Sorry. You know what I mean? Right. No, seriously. Yeah. I mean, I think that it can work in certain scenarios, but I think for the most part, but it's just not, it's not a good idea and I think that that instability, not having friends consistently, constantly feeling shame. I mean, that's what really kind of, it got me, you know, in a lot of trouble, you know, in my teen years and right up until, you know, my late, my late 20s, yeah, and I was just such an angry person and I just felt so much shame and I hated who I was. Of course. You could have really been yourself. Yeah. Yeah. But did you ever wonder if you were gay? I mean, like, were you confused about your sexuality and your gender? Was it both things that you were questioning or did you ever even question it? No, no, I mean, I would, I would now self-identify as a lesbian. I'm still attracted to females. I've never been attracted to men. We like, and I don't even want to say this in associate because I think a lot of people associate it with being gay, but a few years ago in our relationship, like we started doing pegging. So I know that I don't like men, but I do know that obviously I like things in my ass. But so do I. Okay. And this is what I always say. It's so stupid. It's just a stigma. Okay. It's the only reason why it is. There's nothing to do with being gay. Okay. Gay women go down on women. But does that mean if I have my guy go down on me that I'm gay? Like it's a dumb. It's exactly like you just realize that your ass has a lot of sensitivity like any gay man or any straight woman. I'm a three-in-book girl. It feels fucking good. It would give the same way for a guy. You don't even get over it. It's so dumb. I think that it has nothing to do with it. But I think a lot of guys actually unfortunately are missing out because there is that stigma. And it doesn't make sense because there isn't that stigma for the kind of sex that lesbians have, right? It doesn't translate to the same stigma of oral sex for women, but there's still such an unfortunate stigma attached to gay men that is still there to this day, which I don't understand. So now, when you were younger, right, you knew you liked women. When did you start to wonder about your gender identity? Because you were cross-dressing. Did you, and you said you felt comfortable, did you know what that meant at that time or no? No, I don't think that I was fully aware at that time. I do remember a conversation I had with my mom one time where there was a trans person on. It was like a really old obscure, like, I think it was like Nat Geo or something that we were watching. And she just, like, I guess she had to pull me aside in the other room in the den and like, talk to me because I guess my physical reaction, she could just tell that something was really, really wrong that I was, like, not feeling okay about something because I got really quiet. And of course, when someone like me gets quiet, like, you know, something's wrong because I always talk and I'm always on the wall. Exactly. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. And so she just explained to me, oh, well, it's not, if you're feeling that way, we can get you some help. And so I think that to change you to be, right, not to help you to, right, to help you to go back to being the opposite way, not to go into it, right? Right. Yeah. And so I think that that has definitely played a significant role in me not exploring how I feel and just kind of trying to shove it all down and shove it to the back. And it's taken a long time and I'm just so incredibly blessed that Kelsey has given me this amazingly safe space in our relationship and she always has. And I just, I think that had I never met her, I probably would have never came out as a transgender woman. I probably, I used to be really angry and I don't know, it's just like the flood gates opened a little while ago, like, a little over a week ago. And I think that if you ask Kelsey, she'll tell you that my whole everything has changed. Like I'm just so much more mellow and calm now and like, it's just different. I just feel like, I don't know, I feel resentful in a way that it took me this long. And, but I'm also blessed that luckily for me, because things start to get a lot more complicated if you start trying to transition from a medical standpoint. 40 years of age and older is when it starts to be a much difficult transmission, trans for me. Yeah. Transition. That's interesting. Right. Just physically. Well, with like, yeah, with with with with hormone therapy and yeah, yeah, I never would think of that. I can't wait to get to the point where Kelsey comes into the picture, but I just have a couple more questions about your childhood, like after your mom, your stepmom found all that stuff, right? And she obviously probably threw it away. Did you try to shelf that for a while or did you go right back to getting a clothing and just doing it secretly, what happened after that? I think about a week after that is when I kind of flipped out, I lost it. I threw a bureau through a closed window. And then from that point on, I was either in foster care or incarcerated until I was 29 with very brief periods of being on the street here and there. Oh my god. Did you listen to my Jamal episode by any chance? I did. I did. I did. Yeah, you just put that out, like maybe two weeks ago, I did listen to it. Yeah. He was in the Fed, the federal prison too, because it's a little different like, but what's important about these stories always is like, and especially with Jamal, you could sit there and be like, oh, this is a guy that's in jail or you could be like, no, this is a kid that was gay, who was abandoned and told he was not worthy because he was gay and dismissed by his father. And so he wound up in jail because that ruined his life. You know what I mean? Like, it's like, that's the stuff that really, that happened and that's important. I mean, why were you in and out of jail while this time, like, look what you were going through? I mean, I think that most criminals are born criminals. Right. We're all product of our environment. Most people, some people I think are born defective. I'm sorry, Jeffrey Dahmer, like, you know, Charles Mance, like, I don't know that these people had a shot. There are defective people, but that's not the majority. I just think some people have it worse when they're younger and shit happens to them and it becomes a thing. Like, I mean, you were obviously acting out for probably a lot of reasons more than we could get into on this clock because we want to get into when you met Kelsey and stuff. But, you know, you were acting out for a reason. Something was wrong. Right. Right. Right. So when you were incarcerated, there was no way for you to dress. How did you get your fix? Hmm. The radio show. Yeah. I used to listen to Delilah religiously. Uh-huh. Delilah. I don't know. And just like being able to hear, like, people being hypersensitive and because it's just prison in general is just such a toxic environment. I mean, it's just, it's, you know, and it's taken me a long time to kind of drop that mentality. I mean, it took me a couple of years after I got out to stop. It's like if somebody calls you a punk or a bitch, you have to, you have to take off on them. And if you don't take off on them, then your own, your, your race is going to take off on you. And so it's just, it's, I don't know, I, I think that I don't want to say that I ignored it, but I think that I was just so desperately in survival mode that it almost didn't even feel like I, I needed, needed to fix because like I said, for me, it was never really like a sexual thing. And I already was projecting this macho image of someone that is not me in, in real life just to kind of get by. So I, I don't think that I really thought about it a whole lot while I was incarcerated. Yeah. Listen, that makes sense. If you don't have your basic needs being met and you're in that kind of extreme circumstances, it makes sense that you wouldn't have the luxury to go to that part of yourself, right? I mean, yeah. Yeah. That's how those people's life, but you were living in that extreme kind of life. Now, how do you wind up meeting Kelsey? Well, actually, I will do you want to do you want to do you say, so Kenzie was living. She'd gotten out of prison like a couple days before and smuggled a smartphone into the halfway house where she was living and downloaded a dating app. And that's how we met like both of us were on for like a day and we just clicked and and kind of never have been separate since then. But wait a second. How old are you guys at this point when you guys meet? I was 26, so you would have been 27 or 28. Okay. So you go out your first date with Kenzie, is he like, hey, I just got out of prison? Yes. And, and I was living at the time in a sober house. I was a newly recovered alcoholic. So we're kind of like at the same stage in our life trying to rebuild. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And doing everything you're not supposed to do in AA, the worst thing you do in that first year is have a relationship. I had so many relief. I'm a sober person. I have a great one hour episode about my journey. I coming out, I taped it already and I made a joke like that first year. They tell you, don't have a relationship. Don't do that. I was like, I did everything. I had like 10,000 relationships and so you went and you didn't just have a relationship. We went out and out of relationship with a guy that just got out of prison. But like look at how many years later you guys together and you found the right person lucky. Yeah, we have a really good life now. We live in like the serves in a house and have a pretty normal life. Yeah, that's amazing. Let me ask you this, Kenzie real quick. Do you ever go back to jail or is that your last stint that time? No, I go back one more time. I go back one more time because I violated the halfway house rules for a dirty urine for marijuana and I only had two months left on my sentence. So while I was back in Rhode Island, she would take buses and trains like for like three, four hours each way to come and visit me during those couple of months and then I finally I got released in March of 2016. My head was still broken because I thought I could still use drugs in safety or just a little bit and I actually ended up overdosing and Kelsey gave me chest compressions and kept me alive for nine minutes until the paramedics got there. Wow. Yeah, so there's a lot there. Yeah. But Kenzie and the sober person, I mean you must have known the signs are new when he was using and stuff. I mean, did you know that he was having issues? Yeah, I mean, she, she overdosed that she and I say he, it's, it's, I don't know that she was that she was having, it's hard when you're talking in past tense and thinking of her as a man, but yeah, she, she overdosed the first night that she got out of prison. I knew right away what was going on and she only used for about 10 days before she got sober. So it was a rough 10 days, but don't hold her head out of her butt pretty quick. I overdosed again 10 days later. I mean, and that was, that's why it was going on for that 10 days. And then so it's, yeah, it's, there's a lot there. How long, how long ago was that over seven years? Yeah. I mean, I have seven years clean now. So yeah, that's amazing. I love when you're talking to people like seven years out or your mall 10 years out because I think it's important to show people that people can change. Everyone thinks nobody could change. I believe people can because I've changed so much of my life. Most people think people can't. I mean, people can't fucking change as long as you're alive. That's what you're supposed to do. That's what we're here for to fucking change. You know, I mean, it's actually more abnormal to me that people don't change. You know, you're supposed to change. That's what life's about growing and changing and the, and so I think that that's like amazing that here you are seven years later. I know you have a little one and you guys have a child because you were putting them to bed before we spoke. So like you said, living in the suburbs, why picket fans, who would think that this story could end that way? That's like amazing. But let me ask you, Kelsey, when you meet Kenzie, do you notice anything different about her when you're with her? Oh my god, you're laughing. Yeah. I definitely got like a lot of gay vibes for her. Right. I snooped through her like Google history a little bit and found like a bunch of transgender porn and was like really insecure at first. And then I realized that she just really loves pussy like more than anything in the world. And just kind of put it to the back of my mind because I didn't have any doubt that she was in love with me and attracted to me. But now when you found though, when you snooped in, you were obviously snooping because you thought something was up and you find that transport. Did you go to her and say what the fuck and like how was that, or did you keep it to yourself? Yeah, I just kept it to myself. I don't know. I knew I shouldn't have been snooping in the first place and I didn't, right, I heard it crossed me less. So I didn't say anything. So you didn't say anything, but it did, I'm assuming it made you have questions in your mind for a while, right, because now you have this kind of information. Yeah. I mean, I think pretty quickly after like probably a few years in our relationship, she started to be a lot more open about thinking that she was attracted to transgender people and like watching that porn in front of me and it sort of just became not a big deal. Yeah, that's amazing. That eventually she was able to be completely honest with something you already knew, but you never said anything because you felt secure in your relationship at least at that point. Yeah, exactly. And now, Kenzie, what was the first thing that you put out? She obviously knew something was up. Was it that you're into transport? What was the first thing that you threw out there to Kelsey about your your trans side? Okay. Yeah. No, I think that I think that that would definitely be like underwear, right? Because lovely Amazon has all sorts of like, it's basically women's underwear that are, you know, cute lingerie that they have pouches sewn in the front so that they're tailored, they're tailored for men. And so I brought it up to her. What do you say? What did I say? Honestly, like, wasn't that big a moment? I don't think I remember. Yeah. I mean, it was, it was so non-reactive like she, she was so nonchalant about it. I think that neither of us can really even remember what the reaction was. That's amazing. Lucky you. Then you must have known that at that, you must have known that at that point, right? That you're going to throw that out there and this is the kind of woman that's going to be cool with it, right? This is a couple of years in, right? Like, you really know her by now that you put that out there. Yes, yes. So we were dating for probably at least two years at that point and she actually turned and looked to me when we were standing in our bathroom, we have a bathroom off our master bedroom and she looked at me and she said, if your transgender that I would still, I would never leave you, right? And I'm not sure exactly what prompted her to say that, but she said that a year ago and that was before any of the gender fluid in all the other labels that I felt like I needed to put out there to, I don't know, I think it was a progression for myself too. I think I needed those labels in those moments to kind of cope and kind of just nudge myself a little bit closer to being who I view myself as truly. For sure, I always say that about labels. I think that they're fucking great and I know a lot of old people don't feel that way and some people find them confusing. I don't know that you need them your whole life, but I think it's like a really great thing to be able to be labeled something than to not fucking know. When I was born, there was like three things you could be, gay, bisexual or straight. You were married or single. I mean, there was just like not that many boxes. When if you didn't fit into any of those little boxes, you were like weird or not normal. And so I think it's great that there's every kind of fucking box out there for every kind of gender, sexuality, all that stuff. You don't need to keep it forever and who the fuck do you care if someone labels themselves? But I think it's really helpful to people no matter what age you are to be able to sort of put a label to it. It clears you up. And half our life, we're trying to figure out who the fuck we are. We're not born knowing. Like you figured that out. It's what your twenties are and thirties are. Some people still haven't figured out who the fuck they are. And I do think that these labels really help people. I think it's great. And you just explained that for you. It wasn't a good thing, right? Oh, absolutely. Like because when I finally did tell Kelsey, I mean, I probably was in the fetal position, just had completely losing it, balling my eyes out for I'd probably say it's solid hour or so. And so obviously there was a lot of pain there. But yeah, it allowed me to giving myself these different labels working up to that it kind of allowed me to work it out within myself and also have some peace in the moment. Because it's like, okay, well, maybe I'm just gender fluid. Maybe I swing one way one time and the next time I'll swing this way or yeah, or today I wear a dress tomorrow, I wear pants. And it gave me some relief for a while, right, for a while. And I think that anytime a label is no longer giving me relief, it kind of forces me to kind of figure out what the next label or the next thing is. And so they definitely help me in my journey and being able to progress. Yeah, and all that's doing for you is helping you get really super clear on who you are. And that's important because I have people that are 50 years old and they're still not fucking clear and they haven't been able to be as open as you are and stuff. So you're one of the lucky ones that you're sitting here on my show at 37, you know, with your girl, fully how and proud. What? Uh, because she said that you started cross-dressing two years ago. So that started with the panties and you just brought that out in a bit. How did it progress and how did you feel about it, Kelsey? Like, I didn't really feel that strongly about it one way or the other. It made her happy and so it was fine with me. I kind of, I guess I identified as like on me, I've slept with plenty of women before. I haven't dated one before, but I guess I have. Now you are. You're married to one now, but you had that before. But I just, I love her for the person she is first and foremost and so the outside is just whatever makes her happy makes me happy. But how did it, like in your house though, at this point when, you know, Kenzie starts dressing? Is, I'm assuming it goes from panties to more, right? Like you're then, are you, are you full? Do you get to the point where you started fully dressing in front of her, Kenzie? Yeah. So I think what ended up happening, um, I believe you just told me you wanted to try on a girl's outfit, I think. Yeah, I, I think, I think I actually asked, I, I think I actually asked her to order me an outfit offline. Mm hmm. I think I would start it. And then from there, it was just, from there, it was, okay, well, I think I want to try putting on makeup. And so, um, Kelsey's absolutely phenomenal and, you know, being so patient with me and teaching me all sorts of things and yeah, she ruined all my makeup. Oh my god, I've been pissed. Yeah, yeah, definitely did ruin a lot of your makeup, but I love you. Yeah. So from there, I had been working with a, a, a phenomenal therapist who specializes in matters of gender and, and she's really sex positive and so I've been working with her for about a year. So that was kind of the next, I guess, progression was after the full outfits and the makeup. It came, well, geez, I, I think I really need to talk to somebody about this like I'm not, I'm feeling very less than, I'm feeling very shameful, just kind of all those old voices that were so deeply ingrained in me, we're, we're getting, getting, getting loud. And so I, I did the most rational thing and that's, go to therapy. And I think about six, six months into therapy, I started to identify as a gender fluid and was looking, even, even as identifying as gender fluid, Kelsey would help me find like the best doctors because I wanted to definitely get breasts. I wanted top surgery and I don't know, I, I think that the weight just got too heavy to hold until I just kind of broke down and admitted it to myself and, and to her that I was transgender. Well, and me, gender fluid made me a lot more nervous than, Kelsey just being a woman because like that's so tricky to, to be able to, so the PC word now is blend. What is this blend, blend, what is that, what is that stand for? As opposed to passing as female, you would say blend. Okay. Mm-hmm. So Kelsey, I just felt like being gender fluid, she was never really going to be able to blend in either direction. I was really worried about how that was going to impact her emotionally, whereas now that she's a trans woman, like there's a very clear path forward on how to get her to where she wants to be. Right. Now, Kelsey, do you have like, is anybody else besides the two of you in the know of like all of this stuff that's going on in your relationship? Like have you come out to any other person, Kenzie, Kelsey, have you told any of your friends and like what kind of reactions have you guys got or how you're just keeping it between the two of you as of now, even just the cross dressing and all the stuff that's come up? Right. So we've never shared any of those aspects with anyone, but I did feel like it was very important to solidify and affirm that I am a trans woman that people in my life needed to know. And I was just tired of hurting so much. So we just kind of really took the approach of where we ripped the bandaid off. So we have actually contacted Kelsey's parents, my mother and my stepdad, my dad, all our friends. And you know, I, my heart really goes out there to people that don't have the amazing support system that I have just in my personal life. I mean, obviously we also got on to the forums and joined some LGBTQ plus groups and the support there is phenomenal. So there really isn't anyone in my life that doesn't know at this point. That's pretty major. Now, how did your parents feel when you tell them? Well, so here's the thing I have, I have, I have a sister. She was born a man. So I have a transgender sister as well. Oh, you're kidding. And when did she come out? No, no, no. I went in a step sister. Step sister. Yeah. Okay. She came out right after. She came out about five years ago. She got released from the military and her plan was to, she, she chose infantry front line and her plan was I'm going to save up every penny and I'm either going to die in a war or I'm going to have all the money to transition when I, when I'm, you know, one of my four or five years is up. I mean, she was borderline suicidal. I think it was, it was obviously, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's like either I'm going to like fucking end it all or I'm going to be the who the fuck I am. I get it. Yeah. So the problem is is I mean, I hate saying this, but like, she's just not very nice. She's just kind of a bitch. And so, and so she really kind of ruined it for me with my, my mom and my stepdad, right? Because they now associate with like her being a shitty human with being transgender. Right. Right. And so my mom, we were trying to work up the courage to say some things, to say stuff to her and it had, she was actually asking about my, my transistor and whether or not she had the bottom surgery and we just told her like, that's, that's not ours to tell. Like it's not really any of your business, what somebody has in their pants. And so she was saying a lot of like transphobic things and of course, Kelsey and Kelsey, yeah, my mother was saying on, so Kelsey being Kelsey was really sticking up for me and kind of going to bat. And so at that point, I just had assumed that I was going to lose them, which, which, which my stepdad is probably my biggest support in my life. My dad is, he's, my dad sucks, but my, my stepdad, I didn't want to lose that relationship. So I, I was pretty upset about that. And then I said, well, if I feel like I'm going to lose them anyways, we may as well just rip off the bandaid. And, and so I told her that, what, you have to specify, oh yeah, yeah, so, so, so, I don't even know what I was saying. You told me to text your mom. Oh, yeah, yeah, he won. Yeah, so I, I texted, I texted, Kenzie's mom and said, you know, we use art bark, art barks are code word for Kenzie's old name, because it's just so ridiculous, it makes you laugh. Yeah. So I said, art barks, not art bark anymore. She's, she's Kenzie and sort of just braced ourselves for a response. I think. Yeah. And what was the response? She, my mom has a, like, she has some mental health issues and she's a lot to, to handle sometimes, right? And so she had kind of tried to make it all about her. So I just had to be really patient in texting back and forth with my mom until where we kind of got in a decent place to where now they both say that they are excited and eager to meet me and they live about three, four, three, four hours away from where we live. And so I'm actually going to be driving out there, I think like the second weekend in August just by myself. And I don't know, I guess we'll see, we'll see. Well, listen, I think if you were able to turn them around in that short of a time to where that they were at least texting, accepting and wanting to meet, that's pretty amazing, because that's a far place to come in a short while. And I think, listen, I think, of course they make it about them. This is about you. I mean, this is, as human beings were always like, think of ourselves first, you know, everyone's like basically fucking selfish, you know, when you do have to understand that, you know, you guys are parents now too, that they have to go through their process. You've been dealing with this your whole life. You finally are at the point where you are ready to fucking do it. Sometimes the other person isn't just yet. I actually think you're lucky that they turned around so quickly, because I think other parents take a little bit longer and I think you have to understand that, you know, and give them time because, you know, it took you time to get there, right? So it's something, but I think that that's great that they're ready to meet you and looking forward to it. Well, I think that my, my only full biological sibling was my sister and she just, she just passed away from, from an overdose in February. And so now my mom only has one biological child and that's me. And as for my stepdad, he has other kids, but none of, you know, that he doesn't talk to the other two. So I'm the only child that he has in his life. I mean, now my dad kind of went the complete opposite way, right? Because when my sister died, I, we, my father and I have always had a very complicated relationship. He has no emotional intelligence. He's from a very different generation and he, he drank through his first liver. He just got a transplant like two or three years ago, a liver transplant. And so now he's sober for the first time in like literally 60 years. Wow. And I think that he's probably pretty miserable, yeah, really miserable. And so where I'm, where it's at with him and is he's kind of just ignoring it and kind of refusing to accept it. And like, even though I legally changed my name, he's still dead, dead, dead naming me. Yeah. Oh, and I don't think that he'll ever accept it. But you don't know because listen, let me just tell you something and I put this in part of my, this is very important for people to realize about people and Kelsey, you're sober this and Kenzie, you're sober. You know this. I'm sober and I think what a lot of people don't understand and they forget is that someone that's using something, it's not like you take the thing that you're using away and now you're fixed. The thing that you're using is not the problem. There's something underneath that. You take that away and then the work starts, then you're at the beginning of fixing yourself. And I think a lot of people don't fucking understand that and they think, oh, someone's going to get clean. I got them to stop drinking and now they should be normal. And when they're not normal, they're like, well, oh, this person's still fucked up. Look, they're drinking. Wasn't the problem. You get a sober person. You're a fucked up minute. You stop your stuff because then why you were doing it? Because you were a fucking mess. Your father was drinking himself to the point where he lost his liver because he is protecting some part of himself that he can't fucking deal with or else there would be no reason for him to be drinking that much in the first place. So that guy's fucking lost. It doesn't mean though as a sober person that he's not going to find his way. I think the fact that your dad is sober for the first time and lost his fucking liver is you have actual chance of that man changing and becoming a better person because that's the only way that people who are drinking that much or using that much will ever change is they got to get fucking sober first and then start the work. That's when the work starts. So the fact that he's newly sober, like, you got to give him time, but he might come around. You don't know. So being sober changes people like nothing else would, you know what I mean? Like seriously, it really is the most powerful thing that somebody with fucking major issues could ever do. It changed me. I always say like from going in a room that was fucking pitch black to being out in the sunshine. Like that's how drastic of a change getting sober will be, but it doesn't happen immediately after. It takes years and every year is better and better. You guys know that. You're both sober. So give your dad a chance. He may come around. I think it's amazing that you have that great relationship with your stepdad right now and you know that at least that's not leaving you because that's a thing and what you have is Kelsey. Kelsey sounds fucking amazing. I mean, you know what I always say? I mean, I always say there's someone for everyone like, look, you're a guy that just get out of fucking jail. And the first day you get out, you're like, I'm like an ex-prisoner here, I'm dating. And you meet the girl of your dreams and she's like amazing. Like, it really goes to show that there is somebody for everyone. And if that's what you want, you could find it and look what you found. Like gold. Like my dad's life too. Oh, really? You were a part of his journey. Like, how did you do that, Kelsey? Well, he hadn't been responding to us for a couple days and we knew that his drinking had escalated and Kenzie was feeling really upset with him at the time and didn't want to go over to check on him. So I went over and saw how yellow his eyes were and how jaundice his skin was and basically said, okay, you don't have a choice for going to the hospital and he wanted his burger king first. He went to Burger King and then we went to the hospital and he ended up in the neuro ICU and was very sick for a while and then they got him stabilized and eventually he got his transplant. Yeah. Wow. Lucky him. I mean, a lot of people are that lucky. They get that transplant. I mean, and so soon and just in time. So now, so you literally came out one week ago. How is that conversation for you, Kelsey? Because obviously you probably already knew, I mean, or was it a surprise? I mean, how did you feel about it? Um, I wouldn't say like I was certain, but I'd say I had a pretty good idea of what was coming. Like, like Kenzie said earlier, I'd told her probably a year ago that if she was trans that I was fine with it and that I wasn't going anywhere and she played it like really cool. And so she was driving me crazy. We were just hanging out, snuggling, just having a night to ourselves. Our kid was away at summer camp and she kept kind of being something up and then stopping herself and I was getting more in here frustrated that she wouldn't tell me what it was. And then she finally turned to me and said, I'm trans and I was a little confused at first because I thought we'd sort of already established that she was gender fluid trans and then it kind of clicked for me and I said, do you mean you're a woman and she just like started crying and barely got a guess out and I can't remember exactly what I said, but something along the lines of like, okay, we'll get through this. Right. Mm-hmm. Yeah, that's amazing. And Kenzie, did you, I mean, how did you, and then right after that is that when you started to say, is that when you both decided to come clean with everybody, like how was that conversation with the two of you and why did you decide to pull the band aid off? I mean, because like I said, this has all happened in the past seven days. So everything must have happened very quickly afterwards, right? I mean, I think this is something that she's so desperate to just get moving on the medical transition and, you know, once she's on hormones and gets implants and all that, then everybody's going to have to. Right. Though it was kind of like, might as well just get it over with so we can get her on hormones and like really, really start this process. Right. And you, because you've always been interested in women, right? Like you're down with the transition and it's for you, it doesn't make a difference, correct? It's still, yeah. Yeah, like Kenzie is, what's the other name, Ardberg, doesn't matter, right? Yeah. So, same as I don't like P.I.B. like at all. You don't like what? I don't like P.I.B. What's P.I.B.? Oh, penis in vagina, sex. Oh. Oh, you don't like penetration. I really don't, I mean, I don't mind anal, but like, yeah, I just, I find it uncomfortable. I don't enjoy it. I don't get into it really. So our sex life has always been a lot more about like toys and other forms of play. So I don't really anticipate, like, I'm really excited about having boobs to play with. Yeah. But other than that, like, I don't think our sex life is going to change all that much. Right. And it's like, because you're going to get fully, you're going to fully transition, right? Kenzie? I'm not sure yet, to be honest, like I, I'm absolutely going to live my life. As a woman, but I'm, I'm really trying to keep an open mind and be non-judgmental to myself and just kind of see where this path leads. So if I had to make a decision today, I would say that I would not elect to get any bottom surgeries. There, having functionality was really important to me. Unfortunately, medicine hasn't really caught up yet and they still are just, I mean, because most, most, most hormone treatments kind of, it's basically chemical castration, but they've been doing these things with a low, low dose estrogen to where you don't have to go on a Spyro or a T blocker. So you, you retain your functionality, you can still get an erection. So there are definitely ways to do it to where you can maintain functionality yet on the outside, be, you know, appear to be a blended woman, so I'm not really sure yet. And what is your relationship to your penis? Because I, I feel like some, like the one trans woman I spoke with recently, what was her fucking name? I just have so many episodes. Sienna, she hated her penis. She used to want to try and cut it off with scissors when she was little. I mean, it was always like, and she did the surgery and it was very successful and she has orgasms and all that kind of stuff. But I mean, like, so it doesn't sound like you feel that way about your penis. Like how do you? No, I mean, I've, I've always been, I've always been happy with my penis. Yeah. I don't, I definitely don't hate it. I will say something I've, I've noticed in the last few days is obviously because I'm, I'm not, I never went out in public dressed as a woman. So learning how to like talk properly so that you can still wear the yoga pants and other skinny jeans and stuff like that, that definitely going to be something that I'm going to have to learn that I've noticed as I've been pretty much exclusively wearing female clothes over the last week with the exception of like the non-save spaces, like I was doing some work for somebody and I had to run into Home Depot. So it was shorts and a t-shirt and it's, and it feels like a mask, it feels like a costume. And hopefully my goal is to someday be completely blended and, and feel completely myself. It's, it's just, I'm, I'm really excited to it about this journey and I'm, I'm so humbled and feel so blessed by all the, the support that I get from Kelsey and the other people in my life. Yeah. Well, listen, what a fucking life you got, you've, you've lived already. Even Kelsey too. I feel like there's a lot more backstory there for Kelsey, but, you know, but, you know, and you're only 37 and you've been through so much and you're at this such a pivotal time in your life, like it's so interesting where you'll be even 10 or 20 years from now. But I do feel like you are very lucky. There's only good stuff ahead. I think, listen, I talked to some of my younger friends because I'm in my 50s now and what's bad about being old is like your skin and you're like just like physical stuff. But what's great about being old is like you don't, you're not, like you're done figuring yourself out. And a lot of like those really intense moments in life happen when you're younger because that's when it's supposed to, that's when you are figuring yourself out. And it's just, it's great that you're doing it sooner than later. You know what I mean? It really, it really is. And like I said, you're like, you're one of the lucky ones. You listen to my show. There's so many people that are so much older than you that are still living a secret life. So I think it's so great that when people like you share your story and, and show people that it is possible. You were lucky that you found someone who's very open and accepting. I think younger people are and that's helpful too, just like your age. But I think it's like amazing where you've come from. Now do you have pictures that you could send me for my Patreon? I always post pics over there. I think it would be super interesting for people to see. Oh, I already have one picked out. Her ass looks amazing. Yeah. Okay. Awesome. What's your vibe? Like what's your style, Kenzie? Like what kind of girl are you? She's like a slutty club girl. Oh my God. That's my favorite. I was hoping you'd say that whenever the any kind of when I have cross-dressers on, not just trans, but cross-dressers. And they're like, I love the slutty clothes. I'm like, so do I. I just got actually. I had a guy on from Shapings, a Hoesery brand, right? And he sent me like a whole box of like panties and all sorts of, but then he threw in some like really slutty outfits. And I'm like, oh my God, I can't wait to try this shit on. It's like Bart slutty Barbie clothes. Like that's my favorite kind of a vibe. Oh, I know. You too? Oh, I know. Yes. Yeah, that's definitely my style, lipstick lesbian all the way. Yeah, yeah, I love it. Okay, awesome. So send me some lipstick lesbian picks of you. Kelsey's going to send them over. We love a pick of Kelsey too. Anonymous picks. I mean, Kenzie though, we'd love to see you as Kenzie, right? So it doesn't have to be like no faces. But Kelsey, if you want to send in a pick of you too, where you guys together, that'd be fucking awesome. I love, you know, your guy's story. There's so much there, you know, after you do some transitioning, I'd love to have you back on. I think that would be interesting to follow you in your journey. I like that kind of stuff because when I'm talking people, it's like sometimes we're like at that first chapter, you know, I feel like this is just the beginning in a lot of ways. So it would be interesting to talk to you a year from now and see where you're at. Have you changed as far as bottom surgery? Have you not? Have you? Do you have your breasts? Where are you at? Like really interesting to follow. You know, how has your alcoholic former alcoholic father has that changed because you never know, right? You never know. Right. Right. No, we'd love to. We'll definitely send you some pictures and make sure that we know that we will absolutely do that. I think we appreciate you. We love you so much. No, and I love stories like this and I love that you found my show and I love that you called in and I think these stories are super important and I love that you guys found each other. I like happy endings. I like things that change like this. Like I said, I believe people can change and grow and change and I love showing people that that is the way that is. You guys both have grown and changed, you know, so much. So thanks so much for calling in and sharing your story because I think it'll help other people. Thanks, Kathy. Thanks. Thanks. Thank you. So keep it. It sent me in those picks. Your episode will be up on a fetish Friday. Maybe like next week, maybe I'm going to put it for fetish Friday next week because it's such a good one. Cool. So send me those picks sooner than later. Okay. We absolutely will. Awesome. You guys are the best. Congrats and good luck with everything. All right. Thank you guys. Bye. Hey, everyone. Thanks so much for tuning in to this week's episode. If you want to follow the show, follow me at strict anonymous on Instagram or Twitter that's at strict anonymous. If you are on YouTube, make sure to subscribe. I love YouTube as a platform for my show because people comment there and I try to reply back to every single person who posts a comment. So even if you're not listening on YouTube and you want to talk about the show, go to my YouTube channel, subscribe, like and share my videos, it's strictly anonymous podcast. If you want to sign up for my Patreon, on my Patreon, you are not only supporting my show, but you will get these episodes early, add free, and you get to see anonymous picks of my guests. Most of the girls send in anonymous picks and some of the guys send in anonymous picks. So if you want to see anonymous picks of my guests, as well as support my show and get these episodes early and add free, sign up for my Patreon Patreon.com slash strictly anonymous podcast. That's patreon.com slash strictly anonymous podcast. The link is also in the description below. Thanks so much for listening. Do you have a story, lifestyle, or situation you can't talk about, do anyone, do anyone, or do you just want to let your freak flag fly and be on the show? Well, strictly anonymous wants to hear from you. Send us an email, strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com with your story and your anonymous name, and remember, everything is strictly anonymous, strictly anonymous.