691 - GIRL TALK: Layla was a Former Collard Sub and Now She’s Now a Dom with her Own Sub

Jetzt neu, die Domino-Box. Eine kleine Pizza, zwei Sites oder des Seers ab nur 5,99 Euro. Stell dir deine eigene Box zusammen auf Domino-DE. Hast du deine Freundin gesagt, dass du siehst? Nein, das ist doch mein Ziel. Und was ist das? Das Motto der Show. Let your Greek flag fly. Probably the only good advice I'll ever give you is to re-hide your whips and chain. Here is your host, Cathy. Hey, welcome to the Strictly On This Podcast with Cathy. If you haven't followed the Strictly On This Podcast yet on Instagram or Twitter, follow me at Strict Anonymous. If you want to be on the show, it's called Strictly Anonymous because I change everybody's voices. I also change everybody's names. You could call me from a private number. You can email me from a phony email. I don't really care who you really are. I just want to hear your true stories. So if you have an interest, so if you have an interesting naughty true story, that you want to talk about while remaining anonymous, you could be on the show. So I mean email StrictlyAnonymousPodcast.com. Strictly, oh, and click on be on the show or go or email me. Did I say go to my website StrictlyAnonymousPodcast.com and click on be on the show or email me. Strictly AnonymousPodcast at gmail.com. If you want to leave a confession, have a confession line. See for seven 42035-739. That's three, four, seven, four, two, three, five, seven. Now you could call that number 247. I changed the voices on the anonymous confessions as well. Those are all aired on my Patreon. I dump a bunch of them over there, like a couple times a month. There's hundreds of them on over there. So if you want to hear those anonymous confessions as well as the anonymous sexy picks of all of my guests, as well as get access to my private Discord, where there are over 1,000 people on there sharing all kinds of things with each other, because Discord is a place where you could upload your stuff and other people could upload their stuff, and you could talk to each other. People are like fucking hook it up on my Discord. Okay, I don't am not a part of it, but everybody else is becoming like a fun community. If you want access to all of that, it's only $5 a month. You could cancel it any time. Just go to patreon.com slash strictly on this podcast. All the links to everything I just said is in the description, so don't worry about remembering anything. So today, I have on Leila, Leila London from the Curious Girl Diary. She's been on before. She's done girl talk episodes with me before. People love her girl talk episodes, because there's one thing about Leila, is that she talks pretty dirty, okay. She gets very explicit. She has her own show, and what she did on her show, the Curious Girl Diaries, the podcast, as she always talked about her bucket list, things that were on her bucket list, her sex bucket list, and she went out and did those things. We go into this episode talking about how her recent Cuck Guy that she's been hookin' up with, how he wants her to screw other guys now, and he could watch. She's looking to be the clean of guy. She's really into it. She's doming him currently, and she's recently figured out that she likes doming, and we talk a lot about that. But we then also talk about how she was a collared sub at one time. She had a three-year relationship when she was checking things off her bucket list, with a DOM, and she was really fuckin' into it. And it was hardcore. It was like a real DOM sub-relationship. She was collared. She explains what that means. She talks about all the specific things they did together. I mean, this guy had all the toys, all the stuff. She went into subspace. She explains what subspace is. She went out having bruises. She turned out to really enjoy it. She loved being a sub. She loved the pain. She got really into it, and she gets specific about all of that, as well as talks about the guy who she's currently doming. She happens to be a switch, which I think is like every guy's fantasy. But can be the DOM or the submissive. She does the DOM thing for this guy. She's been pegging him in the ass. She talks about that. He's looking to be the cleanup guy. She talks about his fascination and interest in tasting his own comm. He's looking to taste another guy's company. He has a lot of experience tasting his own. She doms him and makes him do all that shit, and she talks all about it. You're going to love this combo. I will put a link to her podcast in the description. I'm going to be right back on with Leila. There is the strictly anonymous podcast. Hi, Leila. Hi, Leila London. Welcome back to the strictly anonymous podcast for another girl talk episode. How are you? Hi, Kathy. Glad to be back. Hi, Leila. Leila, you host your own show, The Curious Girl Diaries. I think we have a lot of the same listeners, but if anyone hasn't heard your show, they could go listen to it. You're very explicit when you talk about sex. If you want to hear Leila talk about all her encounters, she gets really dirty. Like, dirtyer than I get. For sure. Whenever you come on, you don't disappoint. People love our girl talk episodes. Yeah. Beyond potty mouth. Yes. And you talk. You're like a good dirty talker, I think. Have you ever been given those props? Yes, but yes, from guys that I'm sleeping with. Yes, yes. And you have slept with a lot of guys. Because we do talk off air. And recently, I don't know what we were talking about, but you were like, I was like, maybe you could get in touch with some of your past guys that you fucked. And you're like, I don't even know a lot of their names. It's awful. It is so awful. It is true. Oh my gosh. I felt terrible. Is that make me slutty? No. It makes you like a good podcaster. Because you were like fucking them all for content, right? No. Because that's what you do on your show, right? I mean, you do. I mean, that's what people would get on your show. I mean, you would though talk about your encounters with different guys over the years. Because you've been podcasting for almost as long as I have. So you have a lot of episodes, right? And you do talk. Yeah. And we are going to talk about your most recent escapades. Yes. I don't know if you're as slutty. It's a lot for a lot of people. So there's been, it's been very sporadically. I just don't know. We were talking about this before we started recording. I think there's, I think you're right. I think there's some sort of mercury retrograde. Because I just hit a dating slump, I guess. Yeah. You were in a dating slump last week spoke. I feel like. Listen, I think we could do a whole episode of dating in when you're a little bit older at a certain time of life. It's very different than dating fresh when you haven't been there done that. And I think after you have fucked a lot of guys, I think. And I think we spoke about this last time that you're at a crossroads. I think you have to figure out what you really want. Maybe it's time for Layla to really settle down with one guy. Because that's the opposite of what you've been doing. So you might be just coming to the end of a little era and the start of a new one. And I think sometimes that doesn't happen overnight. There's a moment of not really knowing. Because you have to leave a part of yourself behind and become someone new. And I think last time we spoke, you were at that place. And it's kind of like, I think maybe fucking tons of guys isn't going to be a part of your future. Maybe it's going to be fucking one guy and going and fucking other guys when you're with him. But maybe there's a relationship that needs to come into your life. Well, there are two guys that want that right now that are actually serious kind of long term contenders. And one would be happy with if I was a hot wife, you would have no problem with that. And the other one, he really want monogamy. So we're, which would, I have no problem going back to that because you've been hurt. But let's talk because you wanted to talk me like, listen, last we spoke. I think you were in a throttle with a couple. People could hear all of our other girl talk episodes. Like I said, they're always very popular. People love them. I'll put links to them in the show notes or put the numbers so people could go listen to them. But you were involved in a throttle with a couple. You were like fooling around with the guy. You were very into fucking him and his wife was very into watching. And now I think you said that you have a guy in your life who you have like a kinky relationship with him. And he wants to take it to the next level, watch you fuck other guys, right? That's something you haven't done. Yeah. No, we haven't done that. And so he likes me to tease and deny. I dominate him. He really likes it. I like it too. I generally prefer to be submissive, but it's very fun to be this controlling in the bedroom consistently with someone. He came to me the other day and just said, hey, I would totally be into you making me watch another guy fuck you. And then when he's done, I would lick his come out of you. Oh my god. Yes. And we just had not that's I guess I just didn't really see I didn't really see that submissive now cuff me crossroads coming. He just kind of threw that at me out of left field, but I love it. I mean, I love it. My partner surprises me with a new king. Now is this the guy that you were pegging same guy? That guy. Yeah. Okay. So you have become a little dumb, which I'm impressed with because I happen to be a very domineering kind of woman. And I'm totally not interested in being a dumb, but a lot of guys wish that I were because they love my domineering ways, right? A lot of guys love a girl who has bought some around, but when it comes to the back room, thank you. Because I think it's not so easy to find because I think when it comes to the bedroom, most women roll like me, they want to be submissive. Just like you say, you prefer to be submissive, but you totally get down with being a dumb. And I think that that's super hot. I do. And guys must love it because there's a lot of guys out there that like that. And they do love it. They love it. I mean, it's so much. I was just watching. I came across this video that I have of Nico. That's his name. Nico and I. It's about an hour long. I was going through. I was trying to have my computer was saying, hey, you're getting low on memory. I'm like, what the hell? So I'm going through it. I'm looking for like, where's where are the big files that can delete? Well, one of them that popped up was this hour recording of Nico and I. And I sat there and I actually watched it. And I masturbated to it, which was really hot. And I realized that I'm very good at this. And it just comes natural. And I love it. Yeah, yeah. And it does sound like when we have talked about you doing stuff. And when you just talked about the guy eating the other guys come cream pie shit. Whatever that is. I don't know. Yeah, forget what's called that. You're into it too. It's the clean up guy. You're like, you're down for it. I mean, you would enjoy it. It's like a turn on for you. And that's called being a switch. I think you're considered a switch. I think I am, however, if I mean, my heart isn't submissiveness. But, you know, the stuff is fun to do. I just don't want to get labeled. I don't want. I still want people to know. No, that's not your switch. You prefer, right, right. But I love that. But that's what I kind of like think that that's great that you can get down and do the other thing. Because I think that that makes your dating pool larger. There's a lot, like I said, there's a lot of guys out there that want a dumb woman with dominatrix. There's dungeons for that kind of shit. Guys go all the time. I know. And a lot of the type of guys that like that are really alpha guys. They want to. Oh, switch. Is that. I know. I mean, yeah, Nico is a total alpha guy. Six, three professional athletes. And he's very cute. I mean, oh, he's hot. I mean, he really is hot, hot, hot, hot. And I'm thinking he can get any. Well, he could get any woman to do this to him. He's so funny. And he wants me to do it. Oh, I love it. I just absolutely love it. No, but I don't know that a lot of women can do it. Like I seriously, first of all, I think a lot of women are shy and they can't get into role playing. I think a lot of people don't want to be a dumb. So I don't necessarily think that he could find anyone. That's why I think like it's great to be able for you to flip that switch and bring it. Bring the DOM to the bedroom every now and then for a guy. I just think that that makes you more attractive to guys because you can. Yeah, yeah. And it is, I don't know, it's, it is fun to feel that powerful to have, especially when I'm making post cop cage on and, and I tease him and I won't let him come. And I just, he loves, I just, he just has to, I get to write his face and it's all about me feeling good. And he has to make me feel good and give me a bunch of orgasms. And then if I, if I'm in a good mood, I might let him get some release. Sometimes I'll just ruin an orgasm. But, you know, it just depends on how I feel. Yeah, yeah, like that. He, he, apparently, I mean, yes, he does, which is so, I just, I don't get it. I, even when I'm submissive, don't fuck with my orgasms. I mean, I'll let you fuck with my orgasms, but eventually I need to have one. This guy will let me just, sometimes I'll make him go a month without getting any release. And I just tease the hell out of him and he has to satisfy me. I'll let him, like, leak a little bit and then I'm like, nope, that's it. Okay, guys, do you know that there is a male G spot? And you want to know where it is? It's hidden right underneath your taints. Now, I'm sure most of you know where your taint is. But for those who don't, it's that little, tiny, super sensitive strip right between your balls and your asshole. Okay. Now, listen, if you stimulate your male G spot, you were going to have what's called a prostate orgasm. Now, I never had one because I'm a girl. But the guys who have called into my show, who have had them, talk about it being the best effing orgasm they ever had. Okay, I don't think most guys have had a prostate orgasm. And that's why I am excited to tell you about the butter wellness personal massager. Their personal massager is designed to externally stimulate the male G spot. That's right, you don't even have to go inside to have a prostate orgasm. You take their personal massager and you put it right on your taint and you're going to have a prostate orgasm. And not only that, massaging your taint is going to increase your blood flow, giving you stronger erections. And if you have any kind of ED going on, it's going to help with that. And right now, butter wellness is offering my listeners 15% off your order when you enter the code strictly at butterwellness.com. That's B-U-T-T-E-R-W-E-L-L-N-E-S-S dot com. Use code strictly to get 15% off. Go to butterwellness dot com. Use code strictly or just go to the description and click on the link. To get 15% off and have yourself the best orgasm ever. Yeah, that's a thing ruining an orgasm. I mean, who knew girls like it too? I don't personally. That's why I find it. You want to see me turn into go from just pop out of submissive mode and get into bitch mode. Don't give me my orgasm. That's going to piss me off. Well, the weird thing I learned on my show from doing my show was that some people, a lot of people don't consider having an orgasm the end all be all. They feel like sex can be great without it. Those two things don't necessarily have to go together where I was like, wow, I'm so average. If I'm having sex, I'm having an orgasm. I could probably count on my one hand how many times I faked it. Because there's no reason for me to have sex if I'm not actually having an orgasm and I will make you work until I do. I don't care how fuck along takes me. I'm not faking it to get out of the room. I'm going to have my fucking orgasm. But I came across a lot of people where they would be telling me all these hot stories and stuff and then they'd be like, but I never come. And I'd be like, what? I don't understand. And they would like, no, it's like the pleasure of not coming or just the experience was, is all the rage. And I was like, oh, that's like kind of interesting. Because I'm all about the orgasm. I want that ending to me is something that has to happen. I am so with you, Kathy. I've heard the same thing and people will tell me like, oh, we just, we're just having like energetic orgasms and like energetic orgasms. What the fuck is that? No, so I could you climax, you come, it's like some new, they put this new age label on it. I'm like, no, no, no, if I'm getting down with you, I, I'm expecting an orgasm. Don't that's what I'm here for. That's what you're here for. I hopefully I'm going to have more than one. And I just can't do this. I don't even know what this whole energy thing is. We're not having one and it's still really good. There is though something because the other thing, sometimes it's like women that say that, but they're still enjoying it. I'm like, okay, but the other thing is the guy who goes to the dungeon and he edges the whole time and he doesn't come. And I'm like, I don't understand it. But then one guy explained it to me and he was like, listen, after you come, you kind of are like you go from being in like a drunken state to being in reality. And I think the guy was like, I don't want to get out of that place that I'm in. It's so enjoyable when I'm so turned on that if I don't come, it lasts longer. I think that's what you're doing to your guy. You're just edging him and you're creating that space of being horny for longer. I mean sometimes I'll make my guy go for way longer. I mean, I could have come in two minutes, but sometimes I make it go way longer. Oh, it feels so good, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I was just going to say that I do that all edge while when I'm in the app, I won't sometimes I'm so stimulated. It feels so good. And I just want to come so quick that I'm like, no, slow it down. And just I really want to enjoy and the whole thing of it and everything feels so good. And I want that to last longer before it's over. But that's what the guy that's not coming at the dungeon is doing. That's probably what your Nico is doing there. Yeah. And they're just making a drag out even longer. I think that that's what's going down because that guy you're not letting him come for a month. Oh, I know. In a cock cage. Is he the one that wants he's the one that wants you to see fuck other people, right? So are you just talking dirty about it now? Yeah, we haven't we haven't done it. But he really wants me to get a guy and just haven't come over. And he has to sit there and watch and probably be tied up and all that was cop cage on. And then once the guy comes and he's going to come lick it off me or eat it off me and clean it up. I love that thought. So you like guy on guy action. Well, they're not going to be touching each other. I don't think that he wants to do another guy. He just wants to see all this go down. Yeah, yeah, okay. Okay, but you like, but the thought of him eating the calm off of you. Like, that's all hot being the clean up guys. Yeah, I mean, he's going to hopefully it's around my pussy. So he can lick my pussy. And that's really where I want it. Right, right, right. Did you ever to see ever? I mean, has he tasted his own commas? He that guy? Have you ever snowballed anything? I haven't snowballed it. Wait, wait, wait, wait a minute. Yes, I have. I have as a reward. That's not true. I have as a reward snowballed him. But he he's definitely into his own come. He that I mean, he loves to and he loves loves to drink my squirt. When I say when he makes me squirt, he just laps it up. He wants to be right there. And he literally a cup said in his hands. Oh my god, your fluids. Your squirt fluid. Like what does that stuff that comes out? Wow. Yes. Yes. He loves it. He just loves it. Yeah. And he loves his own come. I'll make him when it when. If I jack him off and let him come. Then it'll be all over his stomach. And I'll scoop it up with my hands and put it in his mouth and beat it to him. Right. So he's totally into calm already. Like he's already down with his. So really the best thing he probably. Yeah, he wants that calm. Yes, from a guy. Do you want it? So are you looking for the guy? Oh, I. I've got a phone full of guys that would probably do that in a heartbeat. I just have to make the call and do it. Right. Okay. And then you. I mean, listen, like you have to do it for your show. Is that what you do? Do on your show? Go back and report. People will hear. You actually do do it. Or will some of my show. Well, but I want to clarify. Like what came first to chicken or the egg? The. The. I'm not trying to go out there and create content. I am just reporting back about my active sex life. It's either there or it isn't. It goes away. You don't do it because of the show. Like you're not saying, oh, I have to go get something for my show. Right. So it goes set up this threesome. Right. Yeah. I mean, yeah. I mean, really your story is that you weren't having any sex at a certain point. And then you decided to check things off your bucket list. And then you just decided to start talking about that. But it wasn't like, like you said, what came first was just that. You wanted to get off your dry spell and just live out all your naughty fantasies. And you didn't a tons of them. Yes. Yeah. And there's still, and then the deeper you go with that, the more. There's a limitless amount of things to try. I mean, honestly, you'd have to be so sexually active. It had to be like your job. I mean, there's, there's just no shortage of fun new things to do. And I always get something new turns me on that never before did, which is very interesting, you know, kind of go deeper and deeper down the rabbit hole. Right. So you probably never, you probably didn't always know that you were a dumb. That was something new with the Nico guy. I didn't know that I was submissive. I didn't know I was, that I had a dominant side. I didn't know that I had a submissive side. I didn't know. I didn't have any of these kinks. I was straight vanilla. And that was that. Yeah. I just didn't have, didn't know any of this was in there. And then I started, once I started knocking things off my bucket list, it just gets, it just gets more and more interesting, the things that I'm now turned on by. Yeah. I mean, and so when you say submissive, like how hardcore into that did you get? Because when I say I'm submissive, I just mean I don't want to dumb you when I'm fucking you. You know what I mean? I'm not like, oh, I want to be tied. Well, I like to be tied up. I don't know. Like how hardcore have you gotten into being a submissive? Like what were your experiences? So well, I was a caller sub for three and a half years. Oh, I didn't know that. Yes. Yeah, yeah. I mean, we were serious about it. And gosh, he, I had, he was the one that knew I had been involved in it well before. And so he knew what he was doing. And just, oh, my God. That, that was the big game changer for me actually was that relationship. And that, that dynamic, that sexual dynamic, that just, that turned me. So that, that opened the door to all the other key keepsets. Now, too. And a lot of the stuff, it's interesting because he's sort of my, I guess, I don't want to, I don't want to give him too much credit. Just, just because I don't even know if he really does deserve it. But he's kind of my muse for when I'm dawning. I'm like, I just remember how he did it in a way he structured it because it was always so excited, signing for me. And so I've bought a lot of that with Nico. Well, tell me that story from beginning, start at the beginning of that story. Then tell me some hot stories and this was a submissive, submissive collar sub because I never hurt that. I didn't even know. I mean, how did you meet this guy? Did you go out looking for a dumb because you wanted to try it out? Or did you meet him and it turned out he was a dumb? Yeah, so he was a bucket list. He kind of remember when I was going, when I was working off actively working off my bucket list, when I had just started getting back out there. This was back in, I met him in 2017. And I was on a hook up app and I had said some things that I wanted to try. And he reached out and said, hey, yeah, I can, I can help you with that. He was also the first guy that ever made me squirt and he did it the first time we tried to. Oh, yeah, I could do that. He did it with his fingers. And, yeah. And, I mean, the whole bed was wet. It was unbelievable. He obviously did it multiple times. But so that was the first time, it kind of started with that. That was like our first date when we had sex and just went crazy and he rocked my fucking world. I mean, I left there. I felt feeling like I needed to think about what just happened. And then, and then we started seeing each other. Uh-huh. And then it got more serious. And then it really, but it turned into being in love with each other. And it was my dominant. And he knew, but we weren't monogamous. And I, but, but the rule, the rule was, I didn't do any BDSM with anybody else. That was his lane. There was no, whatever I did with other people, it just couldn't be any sort of BDSM play. And that was just with him. Now, how hardcore did you get? I mean, did you get beatings? Did you get bruises marks? Like that? Yes. Oh, yes. I love all that stuff. Oh, my God, go into it. Yeah. Tell me some detail. Oh, well, I mean, I mean, there's so many times I was tied up tied to the floor. There's consequence bondage. If you, you want to move a certain way because that feels better, but if you do, you may have something in your ass that's being a hook that's tied to your ponytail that's now being pulled tighter or something on your clit that's now pinching, because you're moving a certain direction. So he had all these tools and all this stuff already, right? He was already a DOM before you met him, right? So he, he was already experienced through and through. I mean, there's, and I just want to say, I want to say there's a difference between guys that can roleplay in the bedroom. And then there's a difference between, and then guys that are humanly dominant men in and out of the bedroom. Right. And that's what made him so just to me, just so fucking sexy. Oh, my God, everything about him just dripped sex. So I pretty much do whatever he kind of wanted me to do. Would he really work as a, or were you allowed to have orgasms with him and that? No, he would, he, well, sometimes he would do orgasms and torture, right? He would strap with, with the rope harness. He would strap like a vibrator to me. So some, and then just turn it on. And I would be like, oh, my God, come. It got painful after when it's just sitting there for a long time, but you keep coming. And then sometimes, yeah, he would deny me. He would just be like, nope, when, when let me do it. And he's also the one. I said that I think I told, told, told you this before. I got, he was a punishment because I was acting up and was being, he said I was being bratty. Just like dry ass fuck me, came in my ass. No, I don't remember the story. I hooked this, I mean, like, but this was one of the best anal encounters I've ever had. Just when it was like, Matt, like, fucking me, the look on his face, like he was so serious. And he hooked his fingers in me and was making me squirt. And I had my, and he had the vibrator on my foot. Kathy, I was, it was like, I don't, that was, that was ecstasy right there. I mean, I just went crazy. It was so intense. So wait, paint that picture. So he's in your ass, which is like banging. So his fingers went or hooked inside your pussy, right? And that's where he's making you squirt. And he also somehow has a vibrator on your clip. Yeah. That's the triple. Wow, wow. That is the triple. Wow. I mean, how did you squirt? How long did that session last? Oh my goodness. A lot. Well, I squirted a lot, but he, he, he came pretty fast. It was just about like, I mean, it was about just jumping the shit out of you. Fucking the shit out of me until he came. And I see the thing is, he knew that I didn't let, I usually don't, I say, don't come in my ass. If we have anal, I don't want to come in my ass. So he came in my ass as a punishment. Oh, okay. So that was what you just grabbed me and started bitch. Right. Yeah. He just, he just grabbed me and was like, okay, fine. You don't want to sort of trying to, I guess direct him on how to fuck me or not in my ass. So, so he's, okay, fine. And just because he pulls it out, sticks it in my ass, hooks his fingers in me so fast. Before I mean, I couldn't even do anything and then just starts fucking my ass really hard. I'm, I'm squirting. I'm like, whoa. Oh, it was super hot. Is that angry hate sex? Like he was pissed. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And did you get into like degradation and all that kind of stuff ever? Yeah. The slapping and the choking and. Oh, yeah. I mean, he would write like all over my body, slept, mine, come, come dumpster. I'm here. Sorry. And that's in the, you go over to his house, he writes all that and then he's fucking you. I mean, that's like how that whole scenario goes down. Yeah, he's fucking me while I'm restrained and writing on me and then every time he, every time I have an orgasm, he puts a mark on my body, keeps track. Yeah, you have to understand. I don't have any experience in that world. Like when I say, I'm a submissive, I'm taught like, you're like, I'm a submissive, not like the vanilla people. Like, I'm like, no, I'm a vanilla person compared to you. Like when I said submissive, I didn't mean this submissive. So I don't know anything about this world. It's super interesting to me. I mean, did he have a dungeon set up or did he just have all that stuff like in his room? Because it sounds like he's got a lot of things that he uses like the hooks and the thing, right? Yeah. Then they're, yeah, then I mean, oh, yeah, well, we, we had a lot of stuff together that we would buy to use on each other. Mm-hmm. Or while he was using on me, I was using anything on him, but yeah. And you were able, I mean, did you know before you met him that you were into pain and pleasure, that you could put those two things together, because I think that's kind of powerful. And not everybody has experience that, but I feel like that's like a, like a switch. You could kind of learn how to do that. Yeah, I had never, no, I didn't even know, I mean, I had no idea that was in there. He did, though, when he saw, except I was like, how did you know? Because I always just thought, no, I'm an alpha female blah blah blah. I didn't, I just never thought I could be dominated, but I wanted to try it. Because I thought there were parts about BDSM that I thought were, were sexy. So I didn't realize that I thought I was just going to do it once. It was going to be a role play. It's like, I always remember like that one kinky episode for me, but I got hooked on it. I mean, I was just like, whoa, like I found my place and just love it. But I had no idea, I had no idea it was in there. Well, because, and you said you got B like bruises and stuff. So when did you realize that you liked that? And what does that experience like to feel pain, but have it be intensely pleasurable? Yeah, yeah. Well, so you kind of get, so you do, I did get into subspace a lot, which is a totally different thing. I mean, it is chemically induced. I mean, you, you do feel like you're on a high. It's very strange, very trippy. And you just, I don't know, you just kind of get, you get hooked into that. And so this, everything that's going on, you, your hyper focused on each sensation. Like nothing else is going on, but what exactly he's doing to you in that moment. So you just feel everything's so intensely. And the fact that it's, but it also feels really good because all that attention and energy and focus is on you. Oh, right, right. Okay. And he's making you just the center of that. Right. And I, that's what I loved. I think most about it was a good dominant, like they do a lot of thinking. I mean, they know you, they learn you, they study you, they're into you. Right. But their mind fucking you. Like they really do those see through you and know what you like on some level and give it to you. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's about kind of, it's a good one kind of knows the things about you that you don't know yet. They're taking you like on a journey. I see where they see where it can go before you do. So that's what he did. And yeah. See, every time I talk about, I hadn't thought about that in a long time. But well, you get me talking about it and going back there in my head. And it's, whoa, I can feel it again. It's super strong. Yeah. And now we're there because I know with BDSM, a lot, there's a lot of other things that go into it besides just the sex. Was he controlling you as well from afar? Like I'm in your daily life because I feel like a lot of times I've heard that people, you know, there's a lot of writing involved. And I don't know, controlling other parts of your life. It's not just about sex sometimes. No, it's not, it isn't just about sex. I mean, the true, like I said, that's what I wanted to distinguish between. There's role playing in the bedroom. That's true beat. That's one thing. And there's a thing wrong with that. It's fun to do. The true BDSM, you know, is, it's a, it's about the relationship between the DOM and the sub. And so they're going to, they're going to decide the things that you're talking about, the tasks and how in depth. And how much, how involved the dominance going to be. This is just part of how, when you're negotiating the race, the construct of the relationship up front, you talk about all this stuff. Right. That's the other thing I love about it. It forces you to communicate and you have to do it really fast and really well. And that's what part of the bonding, I think, that's what makes you bond to someone. And you have to really trust each other because because really what you're doing. Yeah, and you're submissive. He's being submissive to someone else is you're completely giving yourself to them. You are, you know, the rendering, they're in control. Yeah, you have fully surrendered, they're in total control. So there has to be massive trust there to be able to get there and then get into subspace. Right. So then you could really enjoy all this pleasure. So there's a lot of that communication that goes down beforehand because you have to trust somebody. If you know that they're going to be inflicting pain on you, I mean, you guys have conversations about what is good, what is okay, what's not okay, that kind of a deal. Yes, yeah, you'll go through, I mean, you go through everything about there's literally like a sheet you fill out. And you go through and you check off the things that you want to try what you have tried, how much you like those things, what, you know, why you don't, if you don't like it, why you don't like it. And just every single thing under the sun that you have experienced, not experienced or would like to experience. And hard limits. If you have any yet, we put those on there. So how long were you his submissive for what did you call his collared submissive submissive collar. Colored stuff. Well, when you, when you're like a colored sub, it's, that's like a sign of commitment. Yeah, three and a half years. Wow, now did you ever go to any kind of BDSM parties or anything like that, or was it always just you and him solo. No, we went to, we went to, yeah, we went to some parties together. That was, oh, that was hot. That was really, we weren't into anybody else, but just being in that, we thought maybe we'd find a girl and I would do that. But we didn't end up the times that we went, we didn't end up finding anybody that we wanted. But what we ended up realizing is we like other people. It was fun for other people to watch us and we enjoyed it. Oh, right. You got a little exhibitionist in you. Like you would have sex in public with other people. And I never knew that. I never knew that I would like other people watching me. Yeah. But I, I really do. I mean, I don't care what they don't care what those other people doing. But if they're, if they're watching the connection and the chemistry between me and someone else, I get off on that. Right. Now, did you also, I'm assuming if you guys were having sex there, other people were as well. Did you find yourself that you were also a voyeur and it turned you on to see other people fucking right in front of you that. You know, because I don't think a lot of people have experienced that, right? If, unless they've been to a swingers party or an or an orgy. Yeah, no, I mean, it's like live porn. It's, it's very erotic. Right. It turned, it, it turns, it definitely gets you going. It turns you on. And a lot of sex subs have different rooms or different things going on. The place where we're at like one room was, was an actual old movie theater. And it was like one of those old dirty sex movie theaters when they used to go and watch the stag films or whatever. And Jack, the guys would just go in there and jack off. So, and everybody's in there jacking off. So I would, we were watching this 1970s porn. I'm Jack and that was the theme of the room and I'm jacking him off. And people are watching me jack him off. And other people were there just jacking themselves off or there were their partners jacking him off. It was fun. So then we, and then we ventured around from there. That was just one room in this place. And then, and then we went to, there was another room where there was a couple having sex. And you could watch them. And then we kind of slipped out into the hallway and some people kept falling. People were following us around to kind of see what we were going to do. If we were looking for another couple or another person. And then we just started kind of going at it in the hallway and pulled my dress up and was, was just fingering me and making me squirt and. And all these people were just surrounding us like right there next to us. I mean, I felt like they wanted, they were just like, Oh, please tap me in, but we were just kind of about each other. And then we got a room there where you can read your room and have sex there. And we left the door open. So people could watch. Yeah. And could they come in? No, no. So they just watch because that's your room that you read. This is a club. This is what goes down in these kind of clubs. This is the swingers club. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, interesting. Why did you guys. You saw them for three years. What happened? Oh, well, oh, God. My right hand. So we have different. It's got a big, big age difference. And I originally when I started seeing him, I just said, because I really thought this guy's. I'm not going to be. The sex is great. I enjoy his company. Well, let's just have fun. And then when things started getting more serious, it's like, I don't. This can't pass because we're just at different stages in light. But we ran with it as long as we could. And then I kind of. I broke up with him because I was just like, oh, my God. I think I just had a panic moment and was like, I need a break and. That was that. Was he older or younger than you? What was the age difference? Him older. Him younger. He's. I'm here sharing with me. Oh, so he was. Y'all way younger. 12. Yeah. Oh, okay. So he was younger. And that's what that was the thing. You'll never be serious with him because he's younger. I would never want to date someone younger. I would rather date someone older too. I know. It's a tough. It's a tough thing. I mean, some people can do it. And. I'm just. It's like my ego almost can't take it. I don't want to see the day like you don't think I'm attractive anymore. I mean, I just. And. And that's natural. That would be natural if that happened. And of course, yeah. And I think as women, we want to be like the hot piece of ass in the relationship. That's right. And I don't feel like that with someone that's 10 years to 15 years younger than me. I had this one guy I used to work out in the gym with. And he was way younger than me. And he was gorgeous. Yeah. He was like the nicest guy. And I used to just like stare at his skin and be like, oh my god. He has so much collagen in it compared to my. I mean. Is that why I'm always touching their stomachs. Yeah. Like I was like, I don't want to. And it would make me just feel so terrible about myself because I almost have. Like body just morphing. I've always had a good body, but I'm like so picky and like OCD that I can see the littlest flaws. And oh, he's just not felt good about myself. That I was like, I could never handle being with someone way younger than me. ... longer than me! .... ... because I would just think that it actually makes you feel older! ... ... i had this one guy friend who was really older! ... ... also, I'm sure guys don't care about this. I just find that when a guy dates a girl who's Way younger than him. It just makes them look older, I don't know?! ... because I get a whole thing why a 40-year-old woman would fuck a 20-year-old. I've done it. I've had those kind of scenarios. ... ... Because I don't ... ... actually handled my hands. ... Like a relationship with ... ... I don't know that I could do it. Ich würde etwas魔fort invasion können, weil ich ich gar nichts mehr soifs finde. Ich bin dank too viel, ich stehe totalmente growl und archiviert nicht. Ich wollte nicht so fein sein! Aber ich0 und haben die Junge bei 꼼 retrieved. Aber das ist also erst seit fünf Jahren und mindestens bis wir einenslowen toddlingern Gallery und habe die Worte kreiert, aber wenn es nicht Professional gibt, bin den manufacturers erst nichtρούden. Ich denke, dass es wirklich immer ergibt, dass es nicht wirklich gut ist. Ach實포ету kann es nicht wirklich nicht um Auswownersch Diego. Aber ich nicht знаю, was sie sagen wird, weil der Freund eine Verheimat adhere Erin Krasse hat. Du bist Freude, du kannst nicht mit dem Elking. Aber schauen, was du da bist. Everyone, oh, Ashton, dumb turn, you went with someone else. Who cares, she was with them for seven years. Like it is valid. And I do give people that credit. I think that they have more balls than we do. Because they know it might not last. But they still go for the fucking ride and they get what they have. And they know that when it does end, they'll be able to deal. And that's the truth. You're going to deal with whatever happens to you. I deal with whatever happens to me. And I think that's what I realized. I was always more afraid of thinking I couldn't handle it. But I still wouldn't want to date a younger guy. Because it would just remind me, I think of my age. And I don't like that. And I have to say, I like older men. I think young guys are hot to look at. No, I normally do too. I normally do too. This is a way out of character. I mean, really, he's only, yeah, way, way out of character. I would normally never even have. Have seen this coming on my radar. No, it just, it just kind of happened. Yeah, well, you like who you like and you're attracted to him. I had a, when I was 40, I was fucking a 20 year old. I like, I have younger guys that I found attractive. But I typically like an older guy. I like the way that they look. Unfortunately, it's sad, but true. But men look better when they're older. Women don't, unfortunately, it's. I know. And it's sad. But men, a lot of times, they get better with age. They get sexier. Yeah, I know. They get sexier. They're a little wear in their face. Yes. And they look hotter. They get a little bit more of an edge or more masculine looking. And so I find older guys attractive, which is great, because I'm older now. I mean, when I was younger, I always like guys of five years older than me. Yeah. But now, I would go 10 years older and we're talking 60s. But if he's in shape, and he looks good and he's got that gray hair, I like it. I like an older guy. I don't think I could do the hang with the younger guy. But just maybe for sex who cares, you know what I mean? That's for fun, because they do have hot bodies. I get why older guys wind up with younger women. I get why older women are fucking younger guys. I think we're more talking for longer term relationships. Yeah. Right. Yeah. You're Nico guy. Is he younger than you? The guy who wants you to go fuck other guys? Yes. A lot younger or not so much younger? Yes. He's a lot younger. He's not. And he's hot. I think I saw a picture of him. He's a little. Yeah. I showed him to you. Yeah. And I first thought he was like, I looked at him. I was like, oh my god. He looks like you're a trash. He's so sweet. I mean, he's like the sweetest guy. You would think he looks like he'd be stuck on himself. He is just like the nicest guy. I almost feel like, are you for real? Like you look this good. You're this nice. And you want me to do what? You want me to deny you orgasms and put your clock in a cage? And I'm the only one that's allowed to give you sexual release and gratification. Okay. Yes. I'll do it. Well, listen, I mean, maybe there's something to, I don't know if you go in with what you do for living with these guys. But I think a lot of guys might have those kind of kinks or the, the ones that do, would feel very nervous to bring that up and put that on the table with most women. Because most women would be like, what the fuck are you talking about? Yeah, gross. No, we can't cage. What is that? You know what I mean? Like, it's hard to really cop to that kind of stuff with people that I feel like maybe if he knows what you do and how you roll and that you have your show and you're so open-minded that he was probably really excited to be like, you might have been the first woman that he could be open about all this stuff with. And what a great thing for him. Because how many other women does he tell that he's into all that stuff? How many other women fucked him in the ass with a, with a dildo? You know what I'm going to do speaking of fucking with dildos. I'm going to make him put the strap on and fuck me with the dildo. Because he's not allowed to fuck me. Oh, but you, and you could force him to do that because you're the dog. I can. I, yes, I can make now. I mean, he knows how to fuck. He's got a dick. He knows how to fuck. So he can fuck me with the, with the strap on. But you can't use his penis because that'll be too gratifying. So that is true torture, I feel like, because he's doing all that. I was just thinking about that when I was masturbating the other day. And I was like, what's that with the, with the one dildo? Because it's kind of big. And I, and I'm like, I know what I'm going to do. I, I, that idea just came to me right when I was like midsection. Yeah, that's great. And you are a three and a girl. We've talked about anal before. That's for sure, right? You like anal. Yeah. I do. I, you know what though? I was thinking, Kathy, I haven't had anal in a while. I don't know why I just, it's not always on the menu. I think that that's the same for every restaurant and or girl. It's never something that is always on the menu. Except to have a girl named Sheila that I feel like it's always on the menu for her. She's really obsessed with anal. But I think even for three input girls like me and you, because I'm 100% a three input girl, when I have anal, I fucking love it. It's so good, but it's not every day I'm going to be like, fuck me in the ass. Uh-uh. Yeah. For some reason, I don't know why that is. But sometimes, if I haven't, I once remember like having an anal butt plug in, I got obsessed with it and I use it every day for months and months, because it just felt so good. Um, but I feel like you were a butt plug. You were a butt plug? You were a butt plug. Yeah, but I didn't go out like you did to target. Okay, I would just use it at home to play with myself. Yeah, I don't recommend that. It'll fall out when you're trying to check it. That's how Leila rolls. She walks around and goes shopping with butt plugs in her. Did you wear it to church, too, or some chili? I did. Yeah, I did. Yeah, that was really, I'm surprised I didn't burst into flames over that one. Yeah, but no, no, it was like a butt plug that I had, and it was funny, because it was a young guy who's when I go, I was fucking the 25 year old from the gym. He wanted me to get a butt plug for him too, so I just got like matching pairs. We played with it together. Yeah. He was into trying some anal action. I have to say, he was the only guy, besides one other guy that let me, one other guy let me put butt beads in his ass. Butt beads are really good. I haven't used those in a long time. But he was the first guy that was down and open to me, shoving something in his ass, and he liked it. And then I got one for myself, and I liked it. It was just like a little, those little, it was like a butt plug on. Those are good. I know. I love, but yeah, so I have one of those for, for Nico and vibrates. Yeah, yeah, mine vibrating. Mine was a vibrator, too. Yeah, yeah. But if you can't, but that's kind of like playing with fire for him. He's really, it's so easy to stimulate him. He can come and like under a minute, but I have to be careful, because he has to ask for permission. Right, because he's all, I mean, what is he currently right now? Is he in a cock cage right now, as we speak, or is he able to? No, he's not, no, no, no, he doesn't have to wear it. I mean, sometimes I'll say, sometimes I want him to wear it, and I'll have him put it on when I'm not around, but usually because he's playing sports and doing that, I can't, it's what's he going to do if you can't have it on. It's not very comfortable. And now, do you know about his regular life? I mean, does this guy date vanilla girls and in the vanilla world? And you, you're like this secret life that he's living over here? Or is he just not even doing that? And he's just with you? Oh, no, he lives here. He lives here. He lives here. No, no, no, I know. But I mean, is he dating as well? Because he's a young guy. Is he looking for a girlfriend in the vanilla world? And this is like his secret life that he has? Or is he just good with you being his dumb? And he's not looking for a relationship? What's his deal? Yes, it's still latter. And he's not supposed to be getting any pussy. He just wasn't getting kind of anything. Well, that asked me me first. Oh, yeah, I forgot. You're the dumb. You just sat down like a bitch. So X-Men on the dating, unless he wants to just be driving himself crazy. But, you know, he did get some, he didn't get into trouble. He was, he got some vacation pussy when he was away without asking. And so I punished him for that. But he told you, because he wanted to be punished. He told me because he wanted to be punished. Yeah. Interesting. Yeah, yeah. But I, I tortured him spank. I mean, just his ass was bruised. Yeah, when did he bring his ass was bruised? I mean, that's what the other guy used to do to you, right? That's where you learn how to do that. Yeah. How do you bruise his ass? That's right. With a belt, with a pinwheel, with a paddle, with a spatula. I had a cat and nine tails and then a riding crop. I mean, I, and they say belt. I mean, I gave it everything I had. Wow. So you have all the paraphernalia now. Well, well, so we have a, we have a naughty list. And he, it's on, it's on Amazon. And so we add stuff to there that we want to try together. And so he orders a bunch of stuff that we agree on. And then brings it over. Do you wear like outfits? I like to like sliddy outfits. Yes. Well, so I did try to order an outfit. I do want to get more sliddy outfits. I did try to order a, a side from just like wearing like garters and, like, I'm talking about latex stuff. Yeah, yeah. So I did, that stuff doesn't fit right. Like it's too big or it puckers or whatever. You know, I need to just, I think I need to break down and stop trying to buy the cheap stuff and buy something that's like off of Etsy, that they kind of custom make for you. That really fits your body. Because I think it looks beautiful and it's sexy. And I'd love to put one in. He wants to see me in one of those outfits. And I would love to be in one. Yeah, I just really talk about. But I don't want to tell them ones that we ordered off of Amazon. Just like they didn't look right. They didn't fit my boobs right. They were two. The cup size was too small. And then the body was too big of the dress part. And I'm just like, you know, that's not sexy. That's. Yeah, that's not hot. No, it's not hot. So I don't want like double boob coming at the top. And it's everything needs to look just right. Okay. So now when was the last time we're going to wrap it up? I want to know the when he started to bring up the fact that he wants you to go out and find another guy. And when do you think that you're going to make this fucking happen? Did he just bring that up recently? Yes. It's been a week. It's just a week. Oh, okay. So you're going to be on it. Yeah. You have guys in mind. I'm going to be on it. Yes. I do. I mean, I have. I mean, I. Yeah. I just have to figure out like what's the scene I want to set? Do I like, do I want some black guy coming in and fucking me? Or do I want some white guy that kind of looks like him? Maybe it's less. Right. He feels less threatened about that. I don't know. I have to try to figure out what I feel is going to be the best scene for him. Right. Right. This is this makes you the good Dom. Just like the other guy used to do for you. I mean, then you said that's a good Dom does. The good Dom kind of reads you. Knows what you want. And is one step ahead of you to make sure that this is going to be the best experience. So you're trying to figure out what in his fantasy world would be the hottest thing. Yes. So how what what I think is going to twist his mind the most. Right. And what do you think? Listen, let me tell you something about a lot of the cocks that I talked to. They want a guy with a bigger dick than them. For sure. I know. For sure. Exactly. That's a big part of it. Yes. Yeah. And his, which is, I mean, his dick is big. He's got a big dick. That's a problem. Okay. Okay. So I got, I know. So I really, now that shortens the list. But I got a few guys in mind. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's good though. And it's all your problem. You know what I mean? Weeds them out. So I think that that's good. Yeah. Less is more than you, because you just need one guy. And you want to bring him in. But I think he has to have a bigger dick. Because that's something that these guys love. And he might not even know if he's never experienced this before, which I'm assuming he hasn't. He might not know that that's his thing. But it typically goes hand in hand. All these guys that are into even just hotwifing, even if they're not extreme cocks. They like a guy that's bigger than them for some reason. It's a thing. It is a thing. I wish I, I would, I would love to ask more men that are into it. Like why, why does this, why does size matter? Because it really, it's, I feel like it doesn't matter to women. But it really matters to guys. Like they want a guy. Someone's going to fuck their wife. God damn it. He's going to be bigger. I mean, it's, I don't know. It's weird. It's a weird mindset. But they want to see your stretch down. I guess. Or maybe they want to see you be able to take it. I don't know. But I mean, you do say, I have to say that you do say that. It doesn't matter to women. But we did a whole, me and you did a whole girl talk episode about dick size. And all we did was talk about how we don't care about how big a guy's dick is. And then in the same conversation, we talk so much about our best booty calls being the guys with the biggest dick. So I just think all things exist at the same time. It decides doesn't matter and does matter. Okay. Well, it's not going to stop me from, it's not going to prevent me from dating someone or selling down with them. Yeah. I guess so. Yeah. But your cock wants a bigger dick than him. You need to. And if he's big, unfortunately, yeah, you have to go bigger than him. Sorry. I'm special. I'm special dehunting right now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I do think the interracial thing is always a big part of a lot of people's fantasy because it's that contrast to the black with the white. A lot of people are into that. I think you have to do a little communicating. Isn't that like you said? It's what it's all about. Yeah. Go make that shit happen. I know. I know. I know. It's. I've always wanted that scenario. That's on my list too. So this is like perfect. When you said he wanted it, I'm like, oh, okay. Yeah, we can make that happen. Yeah, totally. I got it. I could see why that would be hot. I mean, listen, you already know that you like having sex with other people. So you're putting someone else in the room. You used to do it with that guy and his wife. It's now it's like you and your, your sub. I could see why that would be hot. You'll have to come back in and update us when you do come on. I will. I'm sure you will. I do the whole episode on your podcast. Give a shout out to where everyone could find all your stuff. And of course, I'll put a link to your website in my description. But give your shout out to everything before we go. Yeah. Thanks, Kathy. So everybody can find me at I just tell you the easiest way. Go to the Curiousful Diaries dot com. And from there you can navigate to all my socials. Just roll down at the bottom. You can listen to my podcast. The Curiousful Diaries. Wherever you listen to your podcast. Go ahead. Like it. Subscribe. Download it. You will love it. I definitely am very salacious as you can tell. And then the last thing I also have is a private podcast, which is on my website. The Curiousful Diaries dot com. And you can subscribe for extra bonus content. That's where I get into the extra spicy audio things that I don't want to get. And trouble for on the public side. So it must be really dirty because you can't get a lot away with a lot on. On a regular podcast. So that's where she gets extra dirty, which I so I'm sure is a fucking worth it. So anyway, Lila. Thank you so much for calling in and doing this girl talk episode. So it's all going to be about your dumb and your sub and your sub and your dumb. I know. And love it. Thank you so much for having me. Bye. Bye. Bye. Like the Super Mario Brothers film. Und entdeckt Special Ops Linus von Paramount Plus. Die Mission ist angelaufen. Das alles gibt's hier. Prime Video. Ansehen mit einem siebenteigigen Paramount plus gratis Zeitraum. Nach dem gratis Zeitraum 799 pro Monat. Das ist ein Strickt-Anonymous. Wenn du auf YouTube machen möchtest Subscribe. Ich liebe YouTube als ein Plattform für meine Show. Weil die Menschen hier kommen. Und ich trynne sie zurück. So auch wenn du nicht auf YouTube hast. Und wenn du auf YouTube hast. Go to my YouTube-Channel. Subscribe. Und share meine Videos. Das ist ein Strickt-Anonymous-Podcast. Wenn du eine Sendung für meine Patreon für meinen Patreon you are not only supporting my show but you will get these episodes early. Add free and you get to see anonymous pics of my guests. Most of the girls send in anonymous pics and some of the guys send in anonymous pics. So if you want to see anonymous pics of my guests as well as support my show and get these episodes early and add free, sign up for my Patreon patreon.com slash StricklyAnonymousPodcast. The link is also in the description below. Thanks so much for listening. Send us an email StricklyAnonymousPodcast at gmail.com with your story and your anonymous name. And remember, everything is StricklyAnonymous. StricklyAnonymous.