123 - Gal Pals w/ Mary Lynn Rajskub - The Josh Potter Show

Oh hello and welcome back once again. It is the Josh Potter show and I want to out of the gate thank TK for sending in this little remix. He actually wrote me an email too. He said, Hey Josh, been watching you since the your mom's house days and seen every episode of the Josh Potter show. I've been making music since the pandemic and teaching myself how to sample and chop beats since then. I don't really have anything published, but I just made this on my phone and garage band tonight and saved it to my voice memos for you. Let me know if you need it sent in a different way while he's getting into the files now, but I did want to shout out TK. Thank you for sending that into Josh Potter show at gmail.com. That's where you can send anything in, whether it be music like TK did or it could be an article, whatever it may be. You can just tell me about your friggin day at Josh Potter show at gmail.com. So thank you to him. Make sure you go over to my Instagram at Josh underscore Potter. You can find out about tour dates coming up down the road. I'm got a meeting tomorrow. Hopefully get some East Coast ones up there for you, but we've got Bakersfield coming up April 22nd. We've got the well in Belmont come or not the well, the well is Bakersfield. We've got the I forget the name of the comedy club in Bellflower, California. That's coming up in March 10th. So just go over to the friggin Instagram and click the link in the bio or you can go on Twitter at J underscore Potter other than that. Thank you for subscribing, liking, rating, reviewing. However you go about that kind of thing, please to be continuing to do that. And we have a very, very wonderful guest today, a special guest. It's Mary Lynn Reichkub everybody. How are you? She's an actress. She's an author. She's a mother. Go on. She's a comedian. Go on. I podcast now podcaster that would you do model? Yes, of course. Yes. Go on. Uh, rack on tour. I don't know what is there. What else? What other things are there? Musician. Did I say that's when I left off hot piece of ass hot piece of ass. Um, model, not porn star, classy piece of ass. Not very good students. Not, well, I mean, I'd hope you don't have to do that anymore. Do you have to do student stuff? I'm grasping at this point. Really? I wanted you to go on with say all the things I am and that I ran out. How can you be a bad student? I wrote a book because I made myself do work later in life. I want, because I remember I was. You know what that book involved a lot of like napping, a lot of snacking. Maybe I can write a book then. Right. That's what I'm saying. Get involved. I, uh, I had a teacher tell me about procrastination, like in school, like this is like an eighth grade or something. He's like, if you don't fix it now, you're never going to fix it. And he was like, oh, is that what you did? To be such a great teacher. Was he a good teacher? He was a fine teacher, but he was, it's like, at the same time, it's like, procrastination is the spice of life. Oh, I, I, I hate it, but I'm never going to stop doing it. He was dead out about that procrastinate everything and, um, yearn to do nothing. Oh, I yearn to do nothing. My life is a dream right now. I'm going to look back on this someday and be like, remember when you were wondering if you were working hard enough all the time and you were doing it just right, Josh. That's what we tell myself. That's right. Is that why you like the road because you sit around all day and just stare? It's part of my job to nap all day. Oh, you, you've got to gear up for the show. Yeah. Oh, you got to have the kind of naps where you nap so much that your body is telling you in your dream, like get, wake yourself up. And then you're in that in between state where you're like, am I awake? Am I not awake? Oh, yes. You know, you've slept too much. There's nothing I love more than checking into a hotel, maybe the night before, but usually it's the morning of. And then you just go into a coma and then I, my dream is to just take a shower and then walk out of the shower, get dressed and walk on stage. I want it to be that close. Oh, that's how they get. Yeah. But yeah, no, then it's like, oh, you got to be at the club at this time. Oh, yeah. The club is 10 minutes away and you're like, Oh, God, 10 minutes. Like nothing. Oh, those extra 10 minutes every minute, 10 minute walk though. No, you want to sleep and you want to be on stage, right? Headlining. It's a lot easier obviously because you don't have to get there like right when the show starts, but like back when you're hosting or when you're middle or whatever, you're like, Oh, God, I got to get there. You know, the host is how long the host going to do five minutes, 10 minutes. So you got to get there like right at the beginning. Wow. See, and you don't even have the lady time of where I'm just like pushing it to the edge. You know, I push it. You get your curling iron out. You're like, Oh, just right. I have less prep. What am I going to wear? But I do. You sure. Yeah, you push it. Okay. The host is on stage now. Yeah. Then I'll waltz on. Yeah. Get a look at the crowd. Ah, the road. But do you remember where we met the first time ever? I'm going to, I mean, I'm putting you on the spot. Nope. I was in Buffalo. Oh, I was doing an open mic. Like I did every week. Was I at the open mic? You came to the open mic. I think you were shooting something helium. Oh, you were shooting something in time. I don't know what it ended up being years ago. But you know, you were making a movie there. That's right. And then you just came to do the open mic at the club, which was for all of us insane. We're like, what? You know who it wasn't insane for? The club. Why they didn't do it. They're like, we'll see. We'll let you go on. That's the rub. That's the catch 22 of my life. Really? Yeah, I'm an amazing superstar. I thought they'd like roll it out the red carpet for you. No, they're like open mic. They're like, we can't book you because you won't sell a weekend, but we'll maybe put you on a Wednesday. I'm not even supposed to say that out loud because I'm poking a hole in my superstar star status. Well, I mean, it's not a... I don't think that's necessarily true. The clubs like to say those things because then they... Well, let's just say I'm not... And hopefully talking about it like this is going to get me in with them. But I'm just not... Well, I'll just say that's... It's like one of my clubs I'd like to be in... Well, it's fun. I mean, that's the club guy. I'd like to get a weekend. I grew up in that club. Let's talk clubs. And... You're looking for new clubs? I am. I am. I grew up in that club. Why don't you put in a good word for me? I'd love to, but they, you know, just because I grew up there doesn't mean they tend to put an word for me either. You're on the outs with them too. Not a round on the outs, but I mean, let's... How about a nicer deal here? Did you piss in the corner? I sometimes piss in the corner. But yeah, no, it was crazy that you were at that open mic. That was really fun. And yeah, it was fun to meet you there. The hype, great stage, great room. And you've been so nice to me since I moved to LA. Have I? You know, we got to... Yeah, you're like... I'm gonna stop being nice. Stop being nice. No, you're nice. You're always nice. I'm nice. Oh, well, I mean, what am I going to be an asshole when I first get here? Exactly. What's on from Buffalo? I don't know if you heard. We can Buffalo. I'm doing the... I'm doing the helium clubs. You've been to a little place I like to call Niagara Falls. Didn't think so. You were there in the summertime, though. You didn't get to see the winter, did you? No, is it exciting? Oh, by exciting, you mean, hellacious. I was just there for a blizzard back over Christmas. I got stuck for a week. And then just yesterday, they had an earthquake there. They never have earthquakes. They had one when I was in third grade. And then they had one, and it was a 4.4, which for us, it's like... That even wakes me up out here in LA. But for them, they're like, oh, my Lord, the world is ending. My mom texted me at 6 in the morning. The world is ending. There's an earthquake. What is that? Oh, you're googling something? I don't know. When they pop stuff up on the screen, we're in a new room, folks, for the record. We're in a new room. Welcome. There's going to be some growing pains. Yes, I'm getting my berries. Easily distracted. This is the forced studio that we've had. We were having a great conversation about the weather in Buffalo. I don't know why his mind went elsewhere. This is our fourth studio in two years. It's really exciting. He's just squandering his time with me. I was trying to think of one weather thing, and I couldn't think. I was trying to think of... What do you need a weather thing for? The latest... Like because you said earthquake. Oh, I see. And I wanted to think of the latest... Well, you've lived here for a minute. No, the thing that happens, it's a cold sn... A blizzard? Ice... Break. Oh, you're so sick. And this guy... Okay, never mind. What is the point of this podcast? Were you here when there was a bad earthquake before? I mean, I... No, the big one, the Northridge, I moved here shortly after that. So I moved to LA in the 90s. It's a little time called the 90s. I don't know if you remember that. I do remember it. I was a little child. Oh, you were so sweet. You were so sweet back then. But yeah, you just missed it then. Yes, I just missed it. It hasn't been a big one since then, yeah? Not like that. Are we due? Is that mean that we're due? I guess we're due for all of it, you know? We're all dying. This is true. And I mean, speaking of weather, the Chinese sent a little balloon over here for a weather. Oh, nice segue. Yeah, I know. How is sweet, brother? Isn't that better? I used to do radio. I heard we shot down that balloon. We shot it down. We gave it the old Flight 93 treatment. We went by there, you know? Shot her down. But I don't understand what's happening. Because now there's like a thing where they're saying there were balloons up there when Trump, but he didn't do anything about it. Yeah, I don't know the difference. And then Biden almost didn't, but then he did. And then... Because he got called out. They're like, you won't take down that balloon. He's like, oh, I'll fucking take down the balloon. But is it just happening all the time and why did we see it? Why are we using balloons? That's what I mean. I mean, the Chinese, I would imagine they're already in here. You know what I mean? They're looking at us through cameras. Yeah. Yeah. What is actually happening in the balloon? And everyone can see the balloon. It's not like it's a covert operation. They're like, oh, Lord, they looked up today. Do you know what I'm saying? I think it's fair to say we don't get it. Yeah, yeah. I'm stuff going on. It's something out there. In the balloon. The balloon is out there. But I don't talk about politics on this program. I talk about dumb shit. Get political, man. You want to get political? How's your chance? That was my chance. Well, I'll get political. There is something going on in gay bars in New York City. I'm going to get political. You got Rob on that one. What's going on in gay bars? Three men who visited a New York City gay bar were robbed of thousands of dollars using facial recognition access on their phones. Do you look at your phone? You can open it that way. I do. I don't do that. I got locked out of my own face. With your own face, though? Your face changed? I don't know. I did something to turn it off. I was wondering if that was a lot of about a lot of... If you set it on a day where you're just like, I just woke up and you just set it and then you go out to a gala or something like that and then try to open it and they're like, who the hell is that? A gala really took me somewhere. Thank you for that. You know what I mean though? When you go to galas and you don't look like yourself, you're like, I'm better than me and then you go back to regular shows. When you're going to awards shows. Right. Does the facial recognition, does that become deterred? Does that have a difficult time? It's like, uh-uh. Who the hell is that? Fuck you, man. Right. If you have a glow up, you're fucked. Your phone's like, who the fuck is this? Don't glow up too much. Right. Your phone says, don't go changing. Just be you. I was with some people at the comedy store the other night and they were doing the old- What if you age out of your facial recognition? Exactly, well there's that, but also the voice one. You know the voice recognition? If somebody hears you make a command to your phone, they can simply just walk- Right. We were on Frank Castillo's phone. We were texting his mom the other night because we just knew text mom and it came up and it could do it. Oh no. Yeah, it's bullshit. I don't do it. You have to type it all in for me. I don't fuck around with the fucking face stuff. No sir. And you'll hear in here why exactly? Go on. Three men who were in their late 30s and 40s visited a Chelsea Gay leather bar in Eagle, New York City, or the Eagle in New York City, excuse me, on separate nights in October and November and were each robbed of $1,000 to $5,000 according to the NYPD. No arrests have been made in the investigation. Police believe the criminals were using facial recognition to access the victims' phones and funds once they were incapacitated. I don't know how they were incapacitated. What were they doing some drugs or something like that? What we think is happening with the scheme is that they're being lured away from the club maybe to say, hey, you want to come? This is the cops giving an example of what gay men would do after they leave the club, which I think is hilarious. They'll say, they said, maybe to say, hey, you want to come with me? I got some good drugs or something like that. And then once they get into a car to do whatever it is that they're going to do, you know what I'm saying, like the cops are. That's what it says. That's what it says. Yeah, that's in quotes. To me, there's a lot of ways you could just get someone's phone. Yeah. Why are they? That's like a cop that wishes that that's like his fantasy. You know when someone comes up to you and you're dressed like a cop and they're like, hey, cop, come to my car and you're like, no, no, I can't. I'm a cop and they're like, I like cops. Yeah, yeah, that's what it's basically like this cop is gaming out his fantasies. Like, and then once you get into the car, you know, they're going to do some gay stuff or whatever it is. That's not a real quote. It is not a real quote. At some point or another, they don't know what happened when they wake up. A 19 year old female and a 42 year old male who were visiting New York City, that particular bar that is not affiliated with the LGBTQ community, Hotel Chantel were also robbed in November and December by a same group of criminals. Hotel Chantel? No affiliation? Hmm. Okay. That's a straight place to be. That's a straight place to be. It should be. But evidently they're saying that these people have done this ruse in a non-gay bar. Same scenario where they lure them to their car. Yeah, they have a lot of do gay shit or what? No. They do that with the straight people. I, I, evidently not. I mean, there has to be some finagling to get the phone. I would expect. Wait, what is the scam? They trick the phone. Basically they're luring people away evidently and they say like, you know, you want to do drugs or something. Yeah, I heard that part. And then I'm saying what is it? Somehow they get the phone. Right. They get access to it. They get inside and then they like they know themselves or whatever. They're robbing their money. So they're going into the bank. Oh, this has nothing to do with facial recognition. Well, the facial recognition is what gets them into the phone. But they have to use that person's face. I'm saying like, let's really break it down. No, sure. You got to get your car to do gay stuff. Perhaps they're. Or could you just do that in the bar showing the phone like this? So you at least have to have enough game to get that person's phone or you're stealing their phone or they're having enough game where they get them into the away from the bar place and then they're like giving them drugs or whatever and then they like pass out and they take their phone and they put it up to their face and steal stuff from it. Oh, they, they are using their facial recognition. That's what they could be. I feel like I miss spoke. Well, let's see what happens. This is like a roofy thing from the get go because I was like, if you're really cool, you're just like, Hey, we're friends. Like, let's take a selfie. Why don't you open your phone and just be like, you're actually more nefarious than these actual criminals. Thank you. Thank you. In January, the Eagle, that's the gay bar in New York City posted on its Instagram account, pretty footage of two men interacting with bar patrons outside of the venue writing, do not take rides from these guys. We are told that they have someone in a car around nearby street corners waiting for people to bring them someone. So they're this is like a whole racket. They also added since I'm a since deleted Instagram post that it reported it to known offenders and appropriate authorities. The police spokesperson said that the incidents at the Eagle and the hotel Chantel are not related to any other pattern of robberies happening around the city and that the recent robberies bear a resemblance to cases reported by NBC News back in November. Blah, blah, blah. So this is a date rape, but they want cash. They don't want sex. Yes, they're date raping you for it. It's like, they, they, kind of stuff. We didn't even play the news song. Do you know we have a news theme and we didn't even play it. Listen, I apologize. I'm new to the podcast. I know it's my fault. I interjected, it's read that whole news piece and that was really, that was really unnecessary. Yeah. Yes. I did what I was supposed to do. You did exactly what you're supposed to do. Just without even having all the facts. I was like, Hey, wait a minute. What about like that? That is exactly how the show works. I don't know all the facts. I get a headline. I put it in here, cursed and printed and then I read it. Fantastic. Right. And we're in a whole new room, folks. We moved, we're not in a new building. We're just in a new bigger studio now. So I'm still getting my bearings about me. That's why I forgot to play the music. So it's really my fault more than anything as I'm in a new land. So to speak. Today's Josh Potter show is brought to us by draft Kings and it is perhaps about to be the biggest sports betting weekend of the entire calendar year. If you like sports betting, this is Christmas baby. Super Bowl 57 is approaching and draft King sports book is the official sports betting partner of Super Bowl 57. They've got all the action you need. And when I say all of it, I mean all of it. Sure, of course, they've got things that you can bet on that you'd normally bet on for any other game. But what I like to get into is every single prop bet that I can possibly get my hands on. I want to either win or lose during any moment of the Super Bowl. I love it so much. New customers right now, they can bet just $5 and they're going to get 200 in free bets instantly. I'm going to go with the Eagles in the over. I have to bet the over on the Super Bowl. It's just what I have to. You can't root for an under on the Super Bowl. What are you a bore? So I'm going to go with the Eagles in the over. All customers right now can get in on the Super Bowl 57 excitement with draft Kings happy hour Super boosts. You can check the draft Kings sports book app every day between 6 and 9 p.m. Eastern standard time to see what prop bet will be boosted. And if you go right now, download the draft Kings sports book app, use code Josh Potter, all one word and new customers can bet $5 on Super Bowl 57. They're going to get 200 in free bets instantly. It's only at draft Kings sports book with code Josh Potter minimum age and eligibility restrictions apply void in Ohio. See the show notes for the details. Today's Josh Potter show is also brought to us by Mint mobile. Why are you still paying insane amounts of money on your phone bill? I've been paying my mother's and boy oh boy. She's going to get Mint mobile. I'm telling you right now if saving big is one of your big resolutions for 2023 Mint mobile has you covered. Mint mobile lets you order from home and save a ton with phone plans starting at just $15 a month. And by going online only and eliminating that whole traditional costs of retail and that whole thing, Mint mobile is passing those savings on to you. All plans come with unlimited talk and text plus they've got high speed data delivered to the nation's largest 5g network and you can use your own phone. If you're thinking I want to get some other phone, no, no, you get to keep your phone with any Mint mobile plan and you can switch easily in minutes with ease and switch to Mint mobile and get premium wireless service starting at just $15 a month. And to get your new wireless plan for just $15 a month and get the plan shipped to your door for free, you just go to mintmobile.com slash potter that's mint mobile dot com slash potter. Cut your wireless bill to $15 a month my friend. Go to mint mobile dot com slash potter. Now we can continue with the news. You see worth it right? Let's continue. I saw this one. Oh, Rob's coming outside. I saw this one about children. You have children as you mentioned. You're a mother. Can't believe after all the mic work I've done. Oh, was that embarrassing for you to have Rob come out and like? No, I liked it. Oh, okay. He knows I like it. Tell people about your podcast that you're doing. You do it here too, right? No, I did. Oh, okay. I'm all over the place. I'm always trying to get it off the ground. So the woo you do. It's a new one. It's like not even out yet. You can subscribe before it comes out. It's called that woo you do right now. It's a comedy store. Studios. Oh, cool. Yeah. And so woo, I'm learning what that is by the way, being in LA. Woo, woo stuff that's like yeah. Capricorns and things. Well, that's kind of the point of the podcast is no matter who you've got a woo. Okay. So like do you have a secret thing? Maybe you don't even tell me to save it for the podcast, but it's like let's say for comics maybe you wrote yourself a check for a thousand dollars. It's any like magical thing. The Jim Carrey move. Yeah, or like you carry crystals or like we had one guy who said I don't have any woo, but I just prayed for the first time and we're like let's talk about it because he said he doesn't believe in God, but he prayed for the first time. So it's like whatever your personal mind would be vibes. I like it. That's exactly what I'm talking about. Sports gambling. Yes. This is a great. That's about as far as I guess. This is a great woo. Well, I'll save it for them. These people have heard me talk about sports gambling at nauseam. So I don't need to. We need your type of straight male energy with your sports gambling. I mean, that's true. I don't know if it's straight male and I appreciate you saying that. Of course it is. You're welcome. They're all strong betting on sports. I do. I love the only those the only vibes I pick up on. That's very it's not the only. I mean, I like I like vibes at a roulette table. I feel like roulette to win roulette is all vibes. You need if there's a guy around there that's bad vibes, you're like, I got to go to it. Yeah, I used to play roulette based on the vibes. Yeah, it's all vibes. It's like, what's your birthday? What's your birthday? You know, Annie Letterman? Obviously. We had New Year's Eve with. We spent New Year's Eve with her last year. Her boyfriend Todd and I best roulette vibes history of time. We always win. Really? I mean, I swear it's like every time I play roulette with Todd, I walk away with what is like hundreds of dollars. It is exhilarating. If you get it on the one where it's time 30, that's the shit. We're always doing birthdays. We're doing like I'm doing, you know, I'm naming hockey players and putting out their numbers. Good stuff. But as a mother, we'll go back to that now. Yes, please. This is interesting. Have your children ever gotten like in trouble at school? We had to go in and deal with the fucking teachers or the principal. Never my child is perfect. No, I have. And I have one child and one ex has been, but you may call them both my children. Has I, have you ever had to go into the school and talk about your ex husband? Many times. No, no, he's fantastic. Look, guys, he's great. We're doing great. We're doing great together. We both love our child. My child went to a private progressive elementary school, which I found out over time, it was good in some ways. It wasn't a total disaster, but mostly like my kid, he runs pretty hot and, you know, they'd be like, let's talk about what happened. And I just, thank God he got out of there when he did because now he's in a more traditional, like, here's your stats. Here's your percentage of your grade. Like he couldn't deal with, they're like, can you not push on the playground? Like can you not be competitive? He's, you know, he's very much like, do you win? Did we lose? What are my, what's my percentage? And I could just see him when they're like, let's talk about it. He's just retreating into his own mind. That's my take on it. He's old enough to speak for himself and maybe he will someday. And he can reflect upon it. But you know, it's that type of thing like as a parent where it's like, they learn by being themselves. And now it's just like, we just paid a shitload of money for an elementary school that he doesn't remember. And if anything, he just remembers, wasn't allowed to play basketball. So then we had to have some big discussions, like just, he's just like, tell me if I did something wrong. Like what's the rule? Sure. He, it's like, I don't want to sit and have a whole group discussion about how everybody feels about what happened. There are benefits to public school. Obviously, I'm, as I'm saying in a lot, I'm painting it in a terrible picture. No, I think it's, I think there are benefits to public school like that, where it's kind of like, you know, they come in, they do the work and some of them don't, then they kind of fall through the cracks. And I like to think the positive impact for him was a more emotional social thing that maybe he doesn't even realize. Oh, it had impact that he'll find out down the road that he's like, I don't know. Well, this story kind of made me think of a time when I was a kid back in school, because in this story, a child's drawing was confiscated by staff at Hanover Horton schools in Horton, Michigan, after it was considered to be inappropriate. Now, before I get into whatever the hell this one is, I remember I had a, we had this thing called writer's workshop, which was actually a brilliant sort of exercise for like a second grader to do, where our teacher would like make these little booklets and they were cute. They were like, you know, they'd have like wallpaper on it so they'd have a cover and you could basically you could write the words and then you can draw the picture and you can make your own book. That's really sweet. And I made a story and it was like, it was like Star Wars. I made like three series of books and it was called the Mouse vs. the Wrapped and they were both pirates and I would draw the goryest pirate battles that you ever saw, blood, just more. And I remember going after school, I get called in and my parents are there and my teacher had to address the positive violence in my books that they were insane. And my teacher's like, well, why don't you make them friends or something like that? And I was like, that's not how the story goes, bitch. You know what I mean? Like I was upset that they would hinder my creative ideas. You know, I was like, Matt, I didn't understand it. And my mom. I got the number of someone at Marvel I'd like to call on your behalf because this kid knows what conflict is. Well, my mother was like in tears. She was. She thought like because the way that the teacher posed it was that like I was mentally disturbed. So my mom's like, why do you draw such bloody pictures? Like she was. Wait, I thought you said she was looking for the positive. No, they were not. They were bringing me into like see if I was like, you know, if I was ripping the wings off of bugs or something like that. That's fair. Is it? That's what I was. I look back on it and I laugh because it's like I wasn't a violent kid at all. I just was drawing pictures. That was your one outlet. Yeah, it's just let me get it out. But that was the only time I ever had an inappropriate. They made me stop with the rest. My son did in a school where they bring you in for your, we'll see if you're going to let you into the school or not, like sit on the library floor and draw a picture. And he did. He knew that they that he was supposed to be showing up. Like he knew everybody was looking at him. So he was like, pee, pee, poo, poo. Like he kind of was like, okay, that's some. And I knew and he knew that I knew, but it was like an unspoken. I see. I was drawing like, you know, as a little kid when you're drawing like bloody violent pictures, it was like the ones where you'd find them and be like the omen or something. You're like, Oh my God. I mean, like my mom was mortified. I wish I could. I hope she has them somewhere in a box, but I probably threw those ones in the garbage. But I'd love to find them and display them for all of you. But in this case, at first glance, this doodle looks to be innocent. It's an innocent rendition of a pig. So that's not what came to mind for school officials. This person writes, I got a call from my daughter's teacher saying she had drawn something inappropriate in our class here. Does it supposed to be peppa pig? Do you see what could, what could possibly be inappropriate about that? I mean, that pig's got a dick inside his chest pointing at his own dick. So you saw it right away. The dick. Of course. That's what the teachers made a phone call about. I mean, I wouldn't make a phone call about that. I would ask the child. I would hear. What is that right there? And then they go, no, well, you don't want to know why? Because that's supposed to be a tie. Yes, of course. Oh, you knew that part instantly. You instantly I said that looks like a dick, but she thought she was drawing a tie. Okay. Yeah. So why would you make a phone call about that? Never. I wouldn't. Okay. That teacher is a colossal a-hole. Yeah. Like I would have a private laugh. On my own time and enjoy my day. I'd be like, that just brightened my day. This little girl drew a tie that looks like a penis. I'd be in the teachers lounge. Be like, look at the tie on this pig right here. Does it look like a cock? Look how happy that pig. Look at the little lines. That's what I would look at. Look how his hands and his tail are like, yay. The dick is so happy. And it does look like Peppa Pig. What a tragedy to get called in. It's a great drawing. Do you want to hear what the mother asked the color of the purple and the orange and I want a copy of this drawing? Yeah, I would say the least accurate thing is the tie. But you can't get it. You know, it's a child. You can't get it all 100% accurate. I mean, this isn't Bob Ross up here. Sierra Carter, the mother says, I got a call from the daughter's teacher saying she had drawn something inappropriate in our class. She has been fighting with the Hanover Horton schools to omit the picture from her daughter's file. What the fuck? Oh, no. The teacher looked at it and she said, said she had to give it to the principal to get his thoughts on that. She told me that when she gave it to the principal, she asked him what his thoughts were. He instantly said to write her up for it. So this kid's getting in trouble for this. Didn't even city is this? This is in Hanover. Hanover Horton schools in Horton, Michigan. Canceled. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, this entire city. Carter and four girls behalf on this. The whole school district just burned it to the ground. I want to give her a free ride to like a school. The girl who drew the dick pig drawing. I'd like to hear. Carter confronted the principal at Hanover Horton about the situation, but that then was asked, who is responsible for apologizing to her daughter? Despite the reply, Carter pushed forward, resulting in school officials agreeing to remove the right up against her daughter. However, although the right up was removed, Hanover Horton schools kept documentation of the incident on file. Oh, awful. I mean, good God. What if she can't get into like Harvard one day because like you drew a penis on this peppa pig here. That's going to follow you for the rest of your life. I think she should get win awards and a scholarship because of that. This poor girl, 11 year old daughter expressed that she doesn't know doesn't any longer want to go to school. And she's both anxious and worried about getting in trouble because she didn't know what she was fucking doing. No, of course not. What it is. These adults should all be. As a man child, I even know better than this. You know what I mean? Like, that's disgusting poor girl. But let's get to a more lighter topic, shall we? We already talked about the Chinese balloon. I don't really want to talk about it anymore. Stupid. I don't know why I put that in there. This is about dolphin. It's pretty fun. A dolphin skull. Oh, did you know they have skulls? Sure. I didn't know. I thought they were just like jellyfish or something. I don't know what's going on in there. I know they have bones, but a whole skull. Crazy. You thought it was just two bones? I don't know. In the shape of a nose. I mean, it kind of is. Look at that. Yeah. It's pretty bizarre. But customs and border protection agents made quite the aquatic discovery while routinely inspecting international luggage at Detroit Metropolitan Airport last week. The CBP agricultural specialists are doing X-rays on bags, re-entering the United States after they were separated from their owners when they found what was determined to be a young dolphin skull. In this article they wrote, they found something fishy. Good one. That's not good. Dolphins aren't fish. I know that. I may not know they have skulls, but I know that they're not fish. They're around fish. They're mammals, right? But you didn't know they had a skull, but you didn't know they were mammals. Yeah. Solid. The smuggling of certain wildlife, including animals. As if I've ever thought about it, I'm like, everybody knows that. Let's just say, where's the hole? We don't think about it. Where's the hole in the skull, the blow hole? Do you see it? I guess that one's a little different. But in the particular one that we found here in this luggage, the possession of wildlife items, especially those of protected animals, is prohibited. To take wildlife smuggling seriously, and work closely with our federal partners at the US Fish and Wildlife Service to protect wildlife and their habitats. So I don't know why this man, it never says why he had the skull. It is not known who the owner of the bag is, and whether he or she will face some charges. He just ran. He bailed the second they found it. They're like, oh my god, they found the dolphin skull. I'm leaving. I'm not even going on this trip. Not my skull. And then just bails. See, I have clear not to brag, but I would just be totally caught. Nothing. Well, they wouldn't find yours, right? Because if you have clear, they're just like, eh, that's true. Hey, if you need anything smuggled. Yeah, I got you. I got you. I got clear. They're just like right this way. You don't have to take the laptop out, you don't have to take the shoes off. I thought that was just strange that somebody, I mean, people travel with the dumbest shit. Why do you need this? I said it, man. Yeah, male, the dolphin skull, right? Yeah. I would never, I mean, people on the road, they give you stuff all the time, like little presents or whatever. Have you been given a skull of any kind before? Not a skull. What's the weirdest thing you've been given? Nothing really weird. Well, I guess drugs. I mean, like, but it's always like, how am I flying with this? You know, or something will give you like a giant something or other like a, and it's always nice. You know, I appreciate it a great deal, like a piece of art or something. You're like, well, there's no way I can, I'm carrying this on an airplane. Do people give you big, large things? Yeah. You have to like mail it to yourself. Oh boy. Someone gave me a giant like bills thing. That's like huge. I'm like, how the fuck do I put this on the airplane? You know? So someone gave me a skull. Is Josh plain size gifts, please. Thank you. And drugs, we can figure it out, we'll make it happen, but geez Louise. Let me ask you a drug question. Please. Do people give you drugs? Yes. Do you just take the drugs or do you? Well, it depends on what the drug is. Are you in this point of your life and your drug life where you're like that type of, let's see what this pill does. Oh, yes. We just talked about that last week. Oh, okay. Effect, didn't we? I apologize. I apologize. No, I'm not being caught up. No, last week we, I mentioned that I found, I was at the end of my cigarettes and I've heard one read on that. Oh, I did see that. That's why it was like, I did see that. I saw that because you clipped it up. I'm not as much as into that as I used to be. I used to find like pills on my floor of my bathroom and be like, oh, and I would be like a special day. But at least the one on your bathroom, you knew it was your pill. But if a stranger's giving you drugs, I guess. Well if it's from a stranger. Is it mostly me? A little more worrisome weed. It's mostly weed. I usually make if a stranger's offering drugs of, let's just say a powder sort of any kind. I make sure they do it before I do. I make sure I watch them do it a couple times before I'm even going, whoa, dude. You know what I'm saying? That's still is pretty rolling the dice in this climate. I mean, is it? If once they do it and they're walking around, I kind of, yeah, I mean, like, what are we talking about? I mean, I guess it just takes the fun to a new edge. You're even that much more excited when you don't die. Or it just takes the debauchery to a new level too. You're just like, well, if I die, I die. But mostly it's weed. And it's like, you know, that kind of thing. Or shrooms. I don't really do that. And the weed, whatever it is, you'll do. You're not, you're not ever like, oh, what kind of weed is this? No, I never, I don't even care when I go to the stores. I'm so like, I'm such a caveman from being, you know, back when it was illegal, being from Buffalo. I used to buy it from a guy named Gilly who would give it to me and like, loose in a DVD box. You know what I'm saying? Like, I didn't care what kind of weed that was. The DVD box was such an inefficient way. It was the dumbest shit. He goes, sorry, you're gonna be bags. And you gave me in a DVD case. I'm like, what a dumbass. Yeah. And I'm just like, shaking it into a bag then when I get home. And so I mean, when I go to these stores now, they're like, do you look for an Indicos? So Teva, they're talking about the strands. I'm like, I don't give a shit, dude. Just whatever one's closest to you. You don't even have the time to focus on what kind of weed you're like, please. I really get bored by that part of it. Yeah, I guess so. I like just, I'm like, will it get me high? Perfect. That's all I care about. So when they bring it out to shows or whatever, and they're like, oh, I got you this. And then they're going on and on about the strand. Do not tell me about the strand. Just put it in my system. Exactly. No words. I don't need to hear what it's a hybrid of. Or whatever the fuck. Just let me do it. Let me smoke it. Okay. So yeah. Was that it? Were there any other questions about drugs? No, I guess that was, should have been obvious. Well this is an interesting, another school one for you. Okay. And we just today is, we're about a week into Black History Month. A food vendor is apologizing for what it calls an unintentional and insensitive mistake. The situation in question involved food selection served on the first day of Black History Month at a New York middle school. They were asking people if they wanted watermelon, and I was very confused because watermelon really isn't in season. A sixth grader said at named Honore Santiago. Watermelon was reportedly on the school's menu that day along with chicken and waffles. Well that seems more than a coincidence. Yeah it does. That's two out of two. Yeah that's like three out of three. I mean I guess the waffles could be white people stuff. But I didn't really think the school or the company was capable of doing that kind of thing. Just making the kids feel bad. According to NIAC public schools and outside vendor, Aramark planned to serve cheesesteaks on February 1st as seen in a February menu preview. However an earlier menu also listed chicken and waffles as a meal that day. The chicken and waffles and watermelon are stereotypes. Yes we do know that. School officials blamed a change in leadership at Aramark for the mix up. So the Aramark people are like we just, it's just a random Wednesday. We do chicken and waffles on Wednesday and that happened to be the first of the month. My bad. The middle school sent a letter to the parents saying we are extremely disappointed by this regrettable situation and apologize to the entire NIAC community. We have met with Aramark. I am encouraged that they have expressed an interest in working and participating in the training that we do in terms of racial stereotypes. I hope they learned from their mistakes. Well I just think it was a scheduling mishap. You can't put watermelon and chicken and waffles in the same day regardless of the day I don't think. I think that's a pretty solid. Just air on the side of caution. If you're putting the watermelon with the chicken and waffles you're going to get some flak. Just keep them separate. I mean watermelon in February is suspect. Yeah no matter what. Yeah. In February special. Is it though? Maybe it's not. In the winter time. Do we just have watermelon year round now? If it was January 28th and you got watermelon would you go hmm or would you say this is refreshing. I've never had watermelon or chicken or waffles. I've never heard of any of those items at a school lunch. So let me speak of where I before I try to weigh in on this whole scenario. Let me talk about where I come from. Yes please. Canned corn, Salisbury steak, mashed potatoes, pizza, the weirdest waxy looking pizza. Those are the only items I can remember. That's it. That's the only thing I can remember. Chocolate milk, white milk. I'm about to start yelling. This is the most excited I've had. No it's okay. Why are we getting like so elaborate with our school lunch? How do you get chicken and waffles and watermelon? It sounds delicious. It does actually sound like an upper crust. Watermelon sounds like a problem and too much effort based on where I come from. It sounds like they're like what is the least amount of effort and the most we can get for our money. It's the largest can of corn and then just let's buy a hundred more of those can of corn to last us for the entirety of your elementary school. We had time here. Chicken patties, pizza. And I can't remember anything else. Chicken patties is an interesting a ground up. Like that was it. Yeah thank you. Oh actually I maybe I'm making this up. I want to say maybe a fruit cup. Oh sure the fruit cup. Just in the sugary syrup. Yeah that's just in that stupid cup but yeah my point. So don't come at me about watermelon. When Michelle Obama came into power. She was like you only care it's in celery so now they've really gone like it's almost like they're doing it really a snub to Michelle Obama to have fried chicken as a school lunch. Crazy. It's double races now. Yeah. Double racist. I think that's what we get out. Such a complicated meal. Just give the kids the chicken patty and the pizza for Christ's sake. What are we doing here? You know. I've had a vegan soul food from the meal. At school? No. In life. Oh yeah you're right. Where am I when I have that? Wow my brain. I'd imagine it in Los Angeles. It's a place I go. No I think it's in Atlanta. Oh okay. The place I've been to many times and I walk I do a lot of freeway walking on the road. This particular is I'll do a two mile walk. A freeway walk. I do a lot of freeway walking. We were talking about before we were on the air. You take a nap. I wanted to throw in there when you have those extra hours you're going to end up walking across some freeways to a chilis. Yes. Where you're going to try to order the healthy meal and you're going to get a fried chicken salad. The freeway walk is so specific because I've done them obviously. I've done so many freeways. They put you in a hotel where you're like I guess I have to walk across the highway to get to the only way to get anywhere. And then you're rewarded with either a chilis or apple bees, a tallies. What's that other diner place? I can't remember the name of it. Denny's? Yeah but not Perkins. Yeah I think it was Perkins I was thinking. Yes. Perkins. Syracuse Funny Bone has a nice Perkins right by there. Rob's just or a cursance just pulling up school lunches here. None of this looks like anything I've ever eaten at a school lunch. Oh. That's for sure. Yeah that one of those large square pizzas is the one. Oh yes. That looks much better than the one that I take that all day long. You know. Order I mean order. Google school lunches from the 80s. That's what I'm about. Every now and then they would give us and now this could very well be taken the wrong way. Mexican pizza. Okay. But it was delicious. Thank you. Now we're talking. It looked like a square piece of puke but it was actually fantastic. That was it? It was so good. The Mexican pizza. Yeah that top right one but the pretzel with the mustard is a little fancy out of the gate. The rest of it is spot on. Oh that is spot on. Very large tray. That is a big portion I would say. We didn't have trays. That's another expenditure that we didn't really. We had a itemized. We had to give the trays back. You never had to do that. The dark green peas. Yeah you give the trays back. That's right. Yes. Ew. Oh wow. I'm getting upset. Let's transition to sports because we've only got a couple of moments remaining with Mary Lynn. It's getting a little sports. Beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep. This one's longer. Please let it go longer. I was about to go into a trance. You know Tom Brady retired? I heard that yeah. And how do you retire every year? I mean he's going to stay retired it seems. He put out a thirst trap yesterday. Yeah thirst trap it every six months to a year. Just keep it going. See if you can find that real quick Kirsten. If you go to Will Compton's Instagram I know that's like a real out there one but Will Compton just posted the picture up on his Instagram. But Tom Brady retired and everybody's making a giant deal of it. You said you want him to retire every year. Has this have any impact on your life? Him retiring? Because for me absolutely less than no impact. But I like to see him in the news. He's a good looking guy. He's a hero. A hero. He's a country. He's an iconic you know he's a he's a god of our sports world. He's larger than life. He's married to a super model. I want I want to see about the troubles. I want to see if they're still together as a family. I want to see how sullen his cheekbones are. A cheekbones. He posted this just just yesterday. This is what I'm talking about. This is a thirst trap. He is with his Slovenian model that he's dating now. I don't think he's in any other picture. Every six months to a year. How it's going in retirement. That's what I'm saying. I mean what's he doing with his hand there? He's covering his balls. Let him do it. This is the world we live in now. If you don't have Tom Brady with his legs in a diamond shape, knees, a skew, hand flat on the crotch on your on your briefs. Well you did say I don't want to live in a world without this picture. So you're saying you're now say like you go on a you meet a guy and he's like an opulent man. He's got a great home opulent. We're both so good with the words. You walk into his house though. What if he has a portrait of Tom Brady like that up there on this wall? Like a oil painting. Well thank you for cutting this off at the chase before I dated you for two to four months to find out you're gay. Thank you for letting me know at the onset. See to me, give me a tour of your house and let's hang out as gal pals. But gal. To me he's like the ultimate villain. For 20 years he made my life miserable because I'm a bills fan and he was on the Patriots. But then when he left the Patriots I was like okay old man you live your life. So I kind of you know I'm rooting for him in the long run now because he doesn't affect me. Right. Like he used to. But go back to go to the video that is initially the reason we brought this up. Some people are comparing Tom Brady's retirement to some other things that happened in our lifetime. Let's give this a listen shall we? This is a huge moment. Not just for Tom Brady not just for the NFL but like for all of us you know look. People remember where they were when JFK was assassinated. You remember where you were with 9-11. That's something kind of to you real quick. His first start was a week after 9-11. That's how long ago he's been playing. I was I came out the same year as him 2000 and he's still playing 23 years. That's a long time but I'm gonna remember this like I'm gonna remember who I'm with. Kyle's gonna remember he was in Vegas. You're gonna remember where you were when Tom Brady announced his official retirement. And it sounds like this one's for real. Can I tell you I have I have I do not I love football. I do not remember where the fuck I was when he. And that just happened like days ago. Oh I remember where I was. This guy's like 9-11. I remember where exactly where I was. Where were you? I was in my kitchen scooping up the dog food. Putting it in the bowl and I said holy hell. My Tom Brady retired not now not today not what not when I need him most. I dropped the dog. And you know who else has been going since 9-11. This lady. Yeah. Live in live in life. I've been a full grown woman menstruating since before 9-11. Could you imagine in the game of life. I was a sophomore in high school for 9-11. And I remember where I was for that. Will not remember where I was when Tom Brady retired. I'm like was I sleeping. Well don't you think part of that is also that he's retired a bunch of times. I don't remember where I was the first time he retired and I certainly don't remember this last time where I was. I was on Twitter because that's where I read it. That's about all I recall. Now with your son do you find yourself I know you're using athletics. Do you find yourself like being like a what's the word like a stage mom so to speak for any with sports with anything like because there's a little different elements of stage mom's I'd imagine. Are you more like do what you want to do that makes you happier are you like. Get out there. You know what I mean. I like to think I'm a healthy balance. Oh okay. Of both yeah. Now there can be both. That's interesting. Well yeah you got to push but not push too much right. I probably should push more. This young man he is like a shot there's all kinds of these like child reporters now it's kind of weird. The Raiders have been propping this young man. Honestly sadly I think you have to start at this age go on what's it well I mean I here's and I think you need to be pushed it comes to the larger point I'm trying to do you know what his name is their person does it say in the caption or anything. There there we go this one yes please on mute it too. I love it already. Do you go fast. The hell are you. Okay final showdown of the season. I walk into the ponto to ask for an interview he says yes we talk for about two minutes and my life has changed for a second. So now I want to go back to the fall. September 27th 2020 Minnesota right-hand first to this time. Turn cousins drop back to pass the second down and eight third court. He throws a deboughtie you catch the ball you chute Jonathan Joseph and Kenny Carole and as you're on your way to the end so we do the three. Did you think that that dance will take off the way that it did. Well who's son is he. Is Joe saying yes. How do you like this. He was born like that. He's a smart kid man. He does a lot of research. He's been working hard. That is crazy. Well. I mean during that time you could pause I don't need to hear Justin Jefferson try to answer the kids question. But you know he goes in these very smart he knows all the facts he basically laid out that play in like a storybook way and I'm just thinking in my head I'm like what's that mom doing behind the scenes to make that kid I mean that good at that. Like you know what I'm saying. I think he's just like that. If when I have a kid yeah if I have a kid I knew he's going to be loaded up here. He's going to be way better at broadcasting than this kid. I'll tell you that right now because I will be I'll be like say it again don't mumble. It's double you pronounce your word double you not double you like I'd be early hammering it I'm like oh you hear how you stumbled over that one right there. You definitely have that personality you think so hammer yeah oh you think so that's very nice no one's ever said that about me ever that I have a personality where I'm like. Yeah you're straight white male you're aggressive I'm trying to I'm a straight man trying to prop you up I appreciate it. I'd be welcome but I would be very like that's the opposite of the hammer I would I know I'm gonna my kids gonna walk all over me but I if there were one that's true if there was one opportunity to be more like this mom if there was one opportunity though one facet of life where I would be a stage mom it would be if my kid was involved in broadcasting the way these children are that kid was incredible and I do think they have a natural perclivity towards that because I've seen I don't know if you have a kid actors I've seen stage moms but I've also seen those kids where you're like oh the kid is directing the way and the kid was already leaning into that and you sort of like can't if you're a good parent you're allowing and supplying that kid with the tools you're not pushing them into it they're wanting to go in that direction and in this case she bought him a nice suit and got him a fresh haircut and made him like encouraged him but many teams try to copy this model and they've had kids that are real duds yeah tell you so it is I do think it is on the kid but I was just thinking in my head like if I was that kid's parent I'd be like we got something here oh yeah for sure definitely for sure keep it moving my friend well miss Mary Lynn Rice cup thank you for coming thank you for having me please plug anything and everything that you'd like to plug if there's anything at all Mary Lynn Rice cup on Instagram look at this I actually do have dates March 3 and 4 are linked to draft house March 23 25 punch line Atlanta oh my gosh Atlanta get to go back to that soul food I can't wait 10 p.m. at tempey improv April 14th 15 3 ease Colorado Springs this there's stuff missing on here I'm going to Australia oh my Lord no well congratulations those sound like you so much make sure you go check out all the all the road dates the new podcast that will you do right yes thank you very much and when does that begin I don't know soon all right well look for February March pop it in your Google machines and figure it out now and for me please to be continuing to subscribe rate review all the things on YouTube and whatever audio platform you happen to listen to Instagram is at Josh underscore Potter there you'll find dates March 10th like I said Bellflower California bakers field California the month after that oh boy and then May 5th and 6th channel Arizona Mike Drop Comedy Club and we'll get in some East Coast stuff cooked up for you we'll let you know about that down the road and we got some other fun plans I'm going to let you know about next week here on the Josh Potter show thank you so much for joining us once again thank you for having me I'm already late thank you thank you for coming please please ♪♪♪