26 things I learned at 26

My name is Tyre French and this is my podcast. That's what it's called. Tyre French Podcasts. Tyre French Podcasts. Tyre French Podcasts. Tyre French Podcasts. Tyre French Podcasts. Tyre French Podcasts. Hello, hello, hello, and welcome back to the Tyre French Podcast. My name is Tyre French and this is my podcast. And that's what it's called. The Tyre French Podcasts. And happy Saturday, everyone. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry that this is going live on Saturday instead of the usual Friday. And I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry that we also did not have a Wednesday episode this week. The holiday really threw me off. Let me just say. Let me just start art there. Start art. Am I okay? Apparently not. Start out there. You know, I just didn't have it in me. After that holiday weekend, I thought the Fourth of July being on a Tuesday would be great. You know, you basically get Friday off. You have the whole weekend. You basically have Monday off. Then you have Tuesday off. What is this? Absolute Mayhem? Chaos? No. We live in a society with structure for a reason. Because that much free time ain't good for nobody. And I had that much free time. And it was bad. It was bad for my mental health. It was bad for my liver. It was bad for my business structure. It wasn't good. So I should have planned ahead and pre-recorded my episode for Wednesday. But I wanted to give you guys a rundown of the Fourth of July. So I was like, I'll be fine. I'll record it on Tuesday. I don't really think I'm doing anything for the Fourth. And then I ended up doing something for the Fourth on the actual Fourth. And then I didn't have an episode live for Wednesday morning. And then I only had two days to recover. And then I needed to record for Friday's episode, which I also should have re-recorded. But I wanted to. No. What was it going to happen? What was it going to happen? So you're getting this fresh hot off the press. I've just been in recovery mode from the Fourth of July, which I let you guys down. I let my tyrants down because there was no old Navy T-shirt involved. I did not eat a hot dog. I did not even eat a hamburger. I didn't even eat potato chips. What the hell was I thinking? You want to know what I did? Well, on the Fourth of July, I was in bed hungover until 4 p.m. And I had two chick plays, which is for breakfast. So that's on me. Then eventually, luckily, I got out of bed and I went to Tesla's for the last little tail end of the barbecue. And all the hot dogs in the hamburger was already gone. And they were already out of the pool. So it was just a very chill actual Fourth of July for Thai French. But the rest of the weekend was absolute chaos. Absolume ham. It was one of my good friends, birthdays. And that bitch celebrated Friday Saturday Sunday. There was just a lot happening. I hadn't drank in two weeks as you guys know. And I was like, you know, it's my friends birthday. I'm going to go out. I'm going to celebrate. And celebrate I did. And I celebrated a little too hard. And I regret about 75% of it. So I was just in full recovery mode this week. And as you guys know, I've been deciding whether or not I'm going to move or not. And that's just been weighing on me and it's been so stressful. And I've been trying to figure out if that's going to work. Stay tuned for those details. But yeah, it was just a busy week. And I'm sorry. I'm sorry I let you guys down. But here I am. We're recording. And you guys are going to get this on a Saturday morning. Congrats. Have a nice little weekend. How is everyone else feeling? Like are you guys also just shook by this? You can only have a long weekend if you get Friday Saturday Sunday. That's about it. Max, Friday Saturday Sunday Monday. You don't want a Tuesday in there. And it is just absolute mayhem. I'm feeling like a survival of the fittest out here. And guess what? We all know. I need the fittest. So my survival rate is plummeting. Anyways, I don't really have anything else to really tell you guys about the 4th of July. But I really do feel like I let you guys down. And next year, next year, I will be full patriotic. Okay. Other news. Follow me on threads. Are we all on threads? How are we feeling about threads? I have an app type French threads and a type French podcast threads. And here's a thing. I'm loving it. I'm a Twitter person. I've been part of the Twitter gay world. I have like 40k over there because I was thoughty all last summer when I was fit. And my Twitter world and my Instagram world has just been so separate for so long. I'm Twitter is where I get all my pop culture and my gay news. And I follow all the gays and the thoughts and the whatever. My Instagram is more like my work and my curated, the podcast, my style info, my photography info, whatever. And so now that we have threads because Elon Musk ran Twitter into the ground, my two worlds are kind of colliding. And it feels like now I'm on Twitter, but it's with a whole different community. It's with like you guys and like people that I have followed because of their photography. And even like Teza, JC, all of them. They're on threads and like they were not on Twitter. So I don't know. It feels like super fun and exciting. This is like the first like new social media that has come about that. I feel like I like and that is really going to stick. I love that they just like made it so seamless to sign up. But yeah, I'm curious if you guys like it. Follow me on there. Let's chat. It feels like I'm just in like one big group chat. And I feel like that'll be fun for the podcast especially because I don't know. I can like ask you guys questions. We can chat in the comments and whatever. Anyways, I think it's going to be really fun. I feel like we all need to download it. We need to support and drive Twitter into the ground because Elon Musk doesn't deserve that. He doesn't deserve to have Twitter. He deserves for it to be running to the ground. Like last week he was limiting how much you could read tweets. Like he was like you can only read 600 tweets unless you pay for verification. Do you think that that is the right way to get people to stay on your app? I don't think so. He stripped everyone's verifications away. Maybe you can only read 600 tweets. Blah, blah, blah, blah. He's also just like such an ass. Like he is very transphobic. He's very like, I don't know, very problematic in my eyes. And I am glad. I love Twitter, though. And I love that like medium of a social media. So I'm glad that Instagram ripped them off. And normally I'm pissed when Instagram ripped something off. We know I don't like reals or TikTok. But this one they did right. And so we need to support it. So it stays around. And if we all use it, it's all going to be fun. So get on threads if you haven't already because I'm loving it. I'm obsessed. Anyways, I just wanted to say congratulations. And I'm so happy for the Swiftie X tyrant community. For those who fall under Swiftie and those who fall under tyrant in the pen diagram where they meet in the middle, this is your weekend because you've got speak now, tell us version. And you've got a new episode of the tyrant podcast. So you should be thriving. And we all know I'm not a big Swiftie. But I do understand that this is big for you guys. And I just wanted to say I'm happy for you. And congratulations. And I hope you guys love the album. I've not listened to it yet. I probably won't. I might give it a run-through. I might give it one solid run-through to try, especially because there's the vaulted tracks. So they're newer. Maybe send me a DM. I know which one's the best. Which one do I need to start with? I've heard mixed reviews about the album. I heard on the toast. They were saying that they didn't like a lot of the songs. And they didn't hit quite the same as the OGs. And I'll take, then listen to the OG. I promise you, Taylor Swift will be fine without however many streams you give her. Like, for the one song, if it doesn't hit the same. You're allowed to listen to the old song. Sorry. Like, she is literally going to become a billionaire after this era's tour. You're spending thousands of dollars to go on this tour and whatever. If you want to listen to the old version, listen to the old version. Who cares? Like, I promise you, she will be unaffected with her billions of dollars. If it brings you nostalgia and happiness, listen to the old version. Who cares? Anyways, I just wanted to say I'm happy for you guys. I hope you guys are having an amazing weekend. I don't know if all the songs are sad, but I hope you guys are okay. On that note, our song of the week this week is going to be what you want to try by Massigo. If I'm saying that correctly, we know I'm not. We all know I'm not saying that correctly. It's M-A-S-E-G-O. It's called what you want to try, and it is a BOP. It's a vibe. It's kind of like alternative R-M-B. I don't know, jazzy feeling. It's like a very chill vibe. Clean house. Road on the windows, driving the car. It's a sunny day. You're getting ready to go to the beach. That's kind of the vibes, you know. It's not like a turn-up song. But it's cool. Give it a listen. Let me know what you think. Well, today's episode is the last episode that you're going to get before I turn 27. R-I-P to my youth. And like I said before, I understand 27 is still young. For anyone older than me, that's like, oh, you're still a baby. I cram it in your cram hole. Let me mourn. Let me mourn 26. Let me mourn my youth. I'm going into my upper 20s. Almost 30. 27 is different than 26. That's like your mid 20s. I still feel young, you know. 27, I'm feeling old. The knees are starting to hurt. I grow out in the bars. I see all these little twinks in the crop tops. It's not me anymore. It's not me anymore. And I have a lot to mourn, okay? So let me mourn this. Let me have this one thing for this weekend. But I'm excited for 27. And I feel in a really good headspace going into it. 26 was a crazy year of a lot of change. A lot of mental growth. A lot of anxiety. And just unsureness. And I feel like 27 will really be my year. I feel like I have a good head of my shoulders going into it. And I just have a lot of goals and dreams. And a lot of those things are already like in the works. Where like I feel like going into 26, I had no idea what I was going to be doing. I knew that I was like maybe going to want to start the podcast. But all how that was all going to unfold. And I don't know. So yeah, I'm excited for 27. I'm excited to celebrate my 27th on Sunday. Me and some friends are going to be going on a giant catamaran just all day catching some rays out in the ocean. I'm scared that the orcas and the whales are going to be unionizing. And going to be tacking the ship. But I digress. I'm still going to be excited. Yeah, I don't know. It's going to be a great day. 27 is going to be amazing. But before I go into 27, as this is the last episode before the dreadful day on Tuesday, I wanted to share 26 things that I learned during my 26 year with my little tyrants. And I feel like these aren't things that are specific to 26. So I think we can all relay on this and maybe take some advice, whether you're older than 26 or you're younger than 26. This is just stuff that I feel like I'm really taking away from this year and this chapter of my life as I'm going into this new chapter. Because like, you know, you're with your parents until you're 18, typically. And then from 18 to like 22 was all about me discovering myself and my sexuality and coming out and moving to LA and being young and creative and figuring out how to be an influencer and all of that. And then from 23 to 26, basically, we were like in the pandemic. I feel like a lot of my mid 20s were stripped from me. Like party years were kind of taken from me. And so then going out of the pandemic, I would just like, I went full in to partying and, you know, just really living up being outside and getting over the COVID and all of that. And now I feel like 27, I'm really like, I feel like they call it like a quarter-life crisis because it's literally a quarter of your life, like 25, 50, 75, 100. Hopefully I make it that long, I don't know. But I feel like because of COVID, my quarter-life crisis was kind of a little bit delayed because those years were just taken from me. And I truly feel like the last year and this year has been my quarter-life crisis. I've just been like really like stressed and anxious and thinking about what my next chapter is and what I want to do with my life. And, you know, I just never thought growing up Mormon and with my family that I would be 27, not married, no kids. And I know that's still so young and people are going to think I'm crazy, but that's just what I thought like with my life. And then even when I came out and I like wasn't Mormon, I still, I mean, that was when I was 18. I thought maybe in the next 10 years I would get married or have kids. So I don't know. It's just been a lot to kind of process like, oh shit, you're actually 27. And where are you? Where are you in life? What are you going to do? What's next? Blah blah blah blah. Anyways, I'm going on a rant. Today I'm just going to be telling you the 26 takeaways that I have from my 26 year. And then on Wednesday, I'm going to be doing an episode 27 dreams and goals that I have for 27. So that'll be a fun little episode. So this week is just my birthday little celebration. Hopefully you guys can take away some lessons or some advice. Learn from my mistakes and, you know, manifest a good 27 for me on Wednesday when I'm sharing my goals and stuff. But anyways, let's get into the 26 things I learned at 26. Okay, so the first thing that I learned I think is just going to be kind of obvious. And I am so sentimental about this all the time. I feel like I bring it up every episode. But the first thing I learned was how to podcast. And just starting this whole adventure with all of you guys, my little tyrants. And there's a lot of change coming. Well, not a lot of change, but there's some changes coming up to the podcast soon. And I am just thinking you in advance for your patience. And hopefully excitement with all of that. When I first started podcasting, I'd never listen to podcasts. I'd only ever listen to what we said podcast when I was like on or... I would listen to episodes here there, but I'd never listen to anyone else's podcast. And I really feel like, you know, we're almost a year into it. And I've learned so much about podcasting just from experience. And I'm kind of glad that I didn't listen to podcasts before I started because I think it would have just crowded my judgment and crowded like what I thought I had to do. And there's definitely been things that I've changed out the podcast and now doing more research about podcasting. I've tested out some new things here there as I'm sure you guys are well aware. And as we're coming up on this year mark, I really do feel like, okay, I know the format that I want. I know how it's unique. And I'm ready to move into chapter two or version two of the tyrants podcast. So stay tuned. You guys will hear more about that coming up. But that's kind of the thing that I'm... The podcast is the thing that I'm probably the most proud of coming out of 26. And I'm just really proud that I wanted to do something and I stuck by it. And it's almost been a year. There's been many of other things in my life that I've tried that I haven't seen through. And yeah, it's been a lot of work and it's hard. And I'm sure if any of you guys have podcasts, you know how much work it is or I don't know. I hate when people complain about how much work something is because it's like, okay, people who then don't do it. But it's not that. It's just like, it's a lot more than I thought it was going to be. But it's also a lot more rewarding than I thought it was going to be. So anyways, you guys are my favorite thing of 26. Honestly, like this community that I'm building and that we're fostering. I just, I love you. I love my little tyrants so much. The second thing. Another main thing that I've learned or the takeaway from 26 is that I'm fully ready for a next chapter. I'm fully ready to close this first quarter of my life and move into the second quarter. And the second quarter is going to be so different than the first quarter. I hope the first quarter is, you know, just your young years and so much learning and growth and heartache and anxiety and figuring out who you are. And I feel like this second chapter is going to be hopefully filled with so much more like hustling and really laying the foundation like for the rest of my life, like my adult life. And just hopefully a lot of like business and creativity and exploration with who I am like in the world of in society less of like who I am internally because I feel like now I know who I am internally and I'm super secure with that. But now I just really want to find my place like in the world and I feel like I haven't had that up until now, even though I feel very secure with who I am. Yeah, I'm excited to just figure out where I fit in and make my mark on society and in the world. Anyways, the next thing is if you've been wanting to do something, there is a reason for that and you should absolutely go do it. Like for example, the podcast or I don't know, it could be something as dumb as like I want to start hiking and so you start hiking. Like if you have been having a craving for something, you should just do it because there's a reason that your soul is like pushing you to do this thing. There's a reason that your mind is itching for you to have this. It's almost like when you're hungry and your stomach growls. It's like your stomach is telling you you should eat and if you don't listen to it, you're going to be miserable and you're going to get tired and you're going to be fatigued. But if you listen to it, you're going to get satisfied and you're going to have energy and you're going to feel full and whatever. So I feel like it's the same thing and there are a lot of times in my life where I feel like I've had that itching to do something and I've always had an excuse. I'll do it later. I can't afford to do it. I can't do this or I won't be good at it. And I feel like this year I've really learned like just do it. If you have an itching to do something, just do it because there is a reason or there's something that is pushing you to do it and you will feel so satisfied after you do it. Even if you don't succeed at it, it's like that itching will be gone. You will have scratched the itch. So if you have any dreams, just go for it and do it. My next thing is some friendships are not meant to grow out of the phase that you're currently growing out of. If you're trying to maintain friendships that aren't even necessarily like kicking you down or like dragging you down, it's just like some friendships are perfect for this phase of life that you're in. And if you're moving on to a different phase of life, not everyone is ready to move on and be in a different phase with you. And that is totally fine. That doesn't mean you have to cease being friends with them or that you can't hang out with them or anything. But you shouldn't be like stopping yourself from going into this next chapter because you're scared of losing friends that might be in a different chapter than you. It'll all work out in the end if it's supposed to, but some friends truly are just in your life for a season or for a certain phase for your party phase or for your kid phase or for your whatever high school. Like some people are not meant to move to every single phase with you. And that's totally fine. But that is, it's so hard to learn. And I feel like that has happened to me at like each different phase like after high school. You know, you lose something that's hard. And then when I moved from Utah, I feel like a lot of people that I thought were going to be friends for life that I thought would be like bridesmaids at my wedding. I like rarely talk to anymore. And you know, I've had some friends in LA that I'm no longer friends with and each time it does hurt. But I feel like this year, it really just clicked with me to be like, you know what? That's fine. And I'm going to accept what that friendship was and all the beautiful times that we had and all the memories that we made. But I'm going into a new chapter and they don't need to be a part of that. And that's fine. And just have to be like a big drama. The next big thing I learned was, and I've said this before, I think, is nothing changes if nothing changes. And this is not only something that I learned from being 26, but this is one of my huge goals going into 27. That nothing changes if nothing changes. So you want to change, change it. You want to become a morning person, set your freaking alarm. If you want to move to Venice, move to Venice. If you want to cut back on drinking and partying, cut back. But that is not just going to magically happen. And you're not going to magically one weekend, like get the energy to do it or you know, the money is not just going to magically show up to move to Venice. Nothing's going to just magically fall into your lap, like you have to make the changes in order to see the change that you're wanting. And I think so many of us just sit back and wait for something to happen. Or for it to get easier to make that decision or to make that change, but it's never going to get easier. And the change is not, no one's just going to give it to you. And so we're just going to grab the ball by the horns, switch instructions. I don't know if that better for any sense. But the next thing that I've learned is health is literally one of the most important things that we can focus on. And with that, after turning 26, I'm sure if any of you guys are over 26, you know the burden, the worst thing about turning 26 is you get off your parents health insurance. That was so frustrating to me. And so for forever, I didn't have health insurance for pretty much all of 26 and just in the last few months. I had some health stuff and I wanted to go to the doctor and get some medication. And I couldn't. And I just felt like so defeated and so anxious that I couldn't take care of my body because I didn't have health insurance. And so I got health insurance. I have it now. It's for an arm and a leg. It's pretty much the same as my car payment, which is absolutely asinine. And that's a conversation for another day, America. You have a problem. But it really just, I think as you start to get older, I know 27 isn't like the oldest in the book. Obviously, I know I'm still young, but it really is. Once you break your life into quarters, we're all going to be lucky if we get to 100. Like that's going to be a small percentage of us. And so it's like, yeah, I'm already a quarter way through my life over a quarter of the way through. And that's crazy. That's so scary. And once you get older and like you do have like even a minor little health concerns, it's scary because you realize that your clock is ticking down and you want to you want to feel this way forever. You want to feel I want to feel 27 forever. I want to feel 25 forever. I want to always be able to utilize my body and to go and locks walks on the beach and to be able to swim in the ocean. And you know, there's just so many scary things that can happen. I feel like every day I learn something from someone else that I know or that knows someone that is going through like such a scary health thing. And so I really just feel like this is the first year that I have been like, wow, okay, like let's take care of our body. Let's make sure we're eating correctly, going on walks, working out, you don't have to be a Jim bro. And I think that was my thing always is like, I didn't work out and I worked out so hard and I was a Jim bro. And then now I don't do anything. And I'm like, okay, you don't have to go back to your phase of heavy lifting, doing all this yada yada yada. Go on walks, like do some push ups, do some sit ups, like just get your body moving because I want to be able to do this forever. And laying in bed all day, hungover on a gorgeous sunny Saturday, hungover is not good. And I just had this like flash of when I'm like 60 just being like, oh my gosh, the amount of weekends I wasted being hungover in bed, not moving, not going outside. Like I can just picture me like wanting to go hang out with like my kids or my grandkids and just being like either sick or you know can't really walk too far or you know and just being like so mad at myself that I wasted so much time in bed or chilling on a couch watching TV and just like not utilizing my body when it was young and able to do stuff. I don't want to learn how to surf. I want to go hiking. You know what I mean? I don't know. I feel like that got way deeper than I intended it to be. I don't even bring the grandkids into it. But no, just like get a move your body if you're healthy, like utilize it. My next takeaway from 26 is that you should remain active and knowledgeable about politics and like what's going on in your country or your state or your community or whatever. But you need to do this at a healthy enough distance that you can control your mental health and realize that we as citizens or like a member of a community only have so much control and we can only do so much. We can vote, we can protest, we can you know advocate for certain things, time petitions, yada yada yada. But like at the end of the day that is all we can do. There is only so much in our control and we as citizens should not be losing sleep or absolutely letting our mental health get into the gutter over these things that they don't care. Like the people making those changes don't give a rat's ass. They're sleeping just fine at night. So we need to like take a breath fresh air. Do everything that we can for sure. But like realize what is in our control and what is out of our control and just set your expectations accordingly. Like I don't know if that makes any sense, but I just feel like the last few years with like COVID and the whole Trump election and like I feel like obviously that was a few years ago. But as we're going into the election next year, I just have been thinking a lot about it and like who I choose to allow on my like Twitter feeds or now my threats feeds like CNN and Fox and whatever. And it is good to you know stay informed with what people are saying, but they're just got a point where like it was getting so dark for me and I was so stressed and I was so angry at so many things that I had no control over. So it's just help it's helpful to like just have a healthy distance with it while still you know I want to be a functioning member in society and I want my voice to be heard and I want. Obviously, like I care about who's in office and what they're doing with that, but we got to realize that we were just living one day at a time. Okay, so there's only so much we can do. Anyways, this is not a political podcast, but I just had to say my next thing is you do not need to have the best of the best right now in your life at 27. And guess what you probably shouldn't unless you're sitting on daddy's money or grandpa's money or whatever you're killing it at your job. Do whatever, but I just felt so much pressure to you know as an influencer have like the cutest house and the biggest house and the nicest clothes and the nicest car and the bags. If I go to fashion week, I feel like I have to have all new outfits and all the stuff and it's like no right now is when you should be saving and investing in yourself and your future and your business. Not investing in African Gucci bag or Gucci shoes like those are nice things and it's okay to treat ourselves here or there, but I just really feel like like I don't know no one cares. No one cares. No one cares what you're wearing. I feel like most people that I think have the best style for instance like Billy. Billy has the best style of any single person I know and she always looks so effortlessly cool and amazing and she is the wrong person. I'm sorry, Billy. I'm not calling you out like that, but like she gets like a lot of stuff thrifted or like you know she just is so good at styling what she has and I feel like this might be a more vulnerable statement that I don't really want to say but I'm going to say it like in my younger 20s like I was way I was doing way better than I am now financially and I would just you know I'd go to coach and I'd get all new things Gucci and this and I bought the Restoration Harbor Cloud couch and this and that and I had the biggest apartment it was like for granted and I just look back now with like so much regret because I spent so much useless money on the dumbest materialistic things that were not tangible go out of style don't fit anymore like literally the dumbest stuff like I should have been paying I should have paid off my car I should have like bought a condo I should have done so many things at that time and just no one told me no one was guiding me with what to do with my finances and I just thought that was going to last forever and you know as businesses like ebb and flow they get you know I have more successful years and less successful years and I feel like as I've been in like some slower years I've definitely just like like what's the what the praise of the years like bit myself in the ass I was like just feel like it's oh it's come back to myself that's not being myself in the house oh my gosh my okay it's come back to bite me the ass and I'm glad it has honestly because I feel like I was a lesson that I need to learn and I'm glad that I learned it now more than when I'm 35 or 40 but I don't know strut stuff comes and goes I really just feel like now is the time to really be putting stuff in savings and like investing in things that are going to last for your future obviously treat yourself whatever but that's just something that I don't know that's one of my takeaways we should not have the best of the best right now it's okay like we do not need to be comparing ourselves to these celebrities that A have millions of dollars and two most of them are like in their 30s or 40s like we are fine no one needs to be dressed head to toe and designer and if you can afford that I'm so happy for you my next thing traveling is literally one of the best things that you can do for your soul like every I've never regretted going on a trip I've never regretted saying yes buying a ticket taking the road trip going to visit a friend seeing some place new like even if it's just something is dumb is like going to see Joshua tree which is like a few hours from here or I don't know like driving up to big star with my friends was like so fun such a new experience it costs like so little because we just drove and I really feel like if you ever feel like you're on a right or you just are craving something like traveling is always such a good answer to that and it doesn't have to be this expensive trip to Italy it doesn't have to be a trip to Tulum or Cabo or whatever in this nice resort like go camping get outside just remove yourself from your environment is that can just be so healing and I'm really excited to just take more advantage of that this year as we all know I'm trying to be in my camper boy summer which I'm really letting y'all down I need to get I need to get on that I want to go visit Billy so bad and go camping maybe I'll plan that for the end of July who knows we'll see my next one day drinking tonight drinking Marathon not a sprint okay we we got to pace ourselves I feel like a drink as little as sugar as possible that's why I'm a shot girl but if you're day drinking a night drinking you got to pace yourselves don't don't just be ripping all these shots you got to really ease in stick to one liquor don't go from rosé to a mimosa to this to the tequila to the vodka to the dark no no no no no no no stick with tequila tequila I'll to sort out tequila to be exact I don't know yeah I just feel like and don't get me wrong I'm not a party chamber I'm a big part here I'm we're talking about taikilo over here but I just think yeah this year has really tested my limits and my abilities in drinking and imparting and I really have just I feel like I've taken like 10 years off my life this year parting honestly and so I really just feel like I'm taking away like okay you're no longer 21 we can't be ripping shots like we used to we need to drink with a little bit more class a little bit more sass and a whole lot ass no but yeah I just feel like as I'm going to 27 I will hopefully be pacing myself a little bit more and I need to not be as feral oh I said it I said it who knows maybe I will be just as feral don't let me tell you what to do that's just to take away these are these are my these are my things I learned you don't have to do do what I'm saying next is I would rather that don't judge me this might seem obvious but it's taking me a lot to learn this and I really feel like this is the first year where I have really actually embraced it might have said I have in the past but this is the first year where I truly feel it in my soul that I would rather be single and happy honestly then be in a toxic relationship there is nothing more draining on a soul than being in a toxic relationship or being in a relationship that you do not belong in or you know being often on with someone or you know stressed about where that person is why they're not texting you back are they cheating on you there's literally nothing more like depressive and anxiety inducing and at least for me like I went through with my last ex just such toxicity and such a roller coaster of emotions and it wasn't even necessarily all him like I definitely have a lot to blame for it but and that was years ago years ago years ago I don't want to feel like I'm dwelling on the past I feel like I've been healed for it for a while but even when you're healed from it and whatever you still just like crave being with someone and being in a relationship and it gets hard when you start to get 27 and you know we haven't had a boyfriend in a few years and all your siblings are married all your friends are married and they're starting to have kids it's it's it's insane and I feel like it's something that a lot of people don't talk about especially when you live alone and I don't know it's just like I spend so much time alone and I just saw this thing on the threads I posted it and it was like it said Virginia satire is that actual name Virginia satire a world renowned family therapist is famous for saying we need four hugs a day for survival we need eight hugs a day for maintenance we need 12 hugs a day for growth I'm getting done I'm getting zero whole lot of nothing although Monday through Friday I won't even see or talk to a person like it can be a lot and it can be really taxing it can be really lonely so even if you feel like you're healed or whatever it's easy to just crave a relationship and to I feel like it's easy to I think I was in that relationship for so long or I was morning it for so long because I was lonely and this is the first year that I've really just like come to terms with the fact that like I would rather be where I'm at right now still lonely a little sad however it obviously would love a partner or whatever but I would rather be in the phase of life I am right now then to be where I was back then where I was often on with someone in a toxic relationship worrying why they weren't texting me back what they were doing but I like that is just so hard on someone and I'd rather just be alone forever honestly and so and that took a lot for me to learn okay because back then I probably would have just been with the toxic relationship because I was so scared of being alone next take away from 26 is your friends have other friends and that's okay and they should but that is so hard like it's once again especially when you live alone and a lot of your friends like have partners or kids or blah blah blah it's hard like there have been many nights or many weekends spend Friday night and like all my friends have other plans and I end up just spending the night alone and I have nothing to do and it's so easy when you're in that situation to like work yourself up and just like be like okay well I guess I'm a loser and no one likes me and to just get anxious and beat yourself up but you should want your friends to have other friends and you should want them to you should want your other friends to do stuff without you like that is just healthy and like like Teza should hang out with other people JC should hang out with other people and JC should hang out with my friends without me Teza should hang out with my friends without me like not everything has to be a group activity for everyone and not to say like there are definitely like situations where people are being rude or you know leaving people out or blah blah blah blah like I'm not saying put up with like toxic friendships but I just feel like it's easy to router yourself up and to get yourself sad over something that is completely normal and that should be happening if your two friends are hanging out without you let them because would you want your friend to be upset if you went and had a lunch date with a communal friend of yours like I don't know if I'm making any sense or from rambling but I don't know I think it's just healthy to have your own friendships within certain friend groups and it's so fun to come all together but like it's okay to have other dynamics with just you and an individual and that person also is allowed to have other dynamics with other people and that feels like duh of course they are like who are you like Regina George but it's hard and it can get tricky like I said especially when you live alone like there are many times where I'm like going down the roster of my friends and I'm like cool I have nothing to do and you just get so wound up and worked up but it's okay and we should be okay with being by ourselves and we should be comfortable with that and we should thrive in our alone time that's also me telling myself because I need to let that sink in a little bit harder that kind of leads into my next thing that I learned I kind of just said but it's okay to do things by yourself and you should do things by yourself and you should grow to love to do things by yourself go and walk by yourself go to the beach by yourself get some sound like out by the pool read a book going to hike by yourself go to a restaurant by yourself like don't be scared to go eat it alone at a coffee shop or at a breakfast place like if you want to do something just go do it and if no one's around to do it still go do it who cares and there's never once been a time in my life where I've seen someone do something by themselves and I think what a loser never so why do we get so worked up and think that we're gonna look like a loser when we go do things by ourselves why do we think that if we go eat at a restaurant by ourselves everyone it's like so embarrassing when have you ever seen someone eating by themselves at a restaurant and thought like how embarrassing or what a loser and if you answered yes that question you need to reevaluate some things because that is totally fine that's totally normal and that's sweet I actually like that I think it's like when I'm emphasizing your own life and your relationship with yourself so I'm trying to do that more this year that's why I've been going on a hike by myself even when I go on a hike by myself Jose is like well you should have told me like I would have come I'm like no like I wanted to just like listen music listen to podcasts think about my day and do it alone so I don't know I think the more you do it the more comfortable you'll be obviously with it but I really think that we need to learn how to be by yourself because at the end of the day that's all we got until you're married then you got a husband to annoy and tell you have children and then they're there to annoy you so embrace this time alone because we're not going to have a forever my next thing is something that I just remind myself every year and that I have to remind myself constantly and has really been something so beautiful with the podcast that has like really lifted away off of my shoulders of this insecurity that you are too much you are too loud you are too expressive you are too extra like all of these things are demons that I've had like just in my life just growing up and I really feel like this year I think with the podcast like I truly feel like I've found my balance of being calm and being expressive and being loud and being you know more quiet and I feel like I've really found my people who appreciate my expressiveness and my loudness and my personality and it's a really beautiful thing and yeah I just don't want anyone to ever think that they are being annoying or they are too much because guess what if they think you are too much they are not enough if people think you are too much like they are just not your people I can't even tell you how weird and loud and whatever me and my friend group get like and with each friend group it's kind of different vibes also like me and the gaze are loud in a different way than like me and Teza are loud and expressive and extra but I love it and I really just love that I now have these friendships that let me just like be 100% me who I am authentic and I never have to worry about just being too much and doing too much and I hope that everyone else finds that because your people will not only love your energy they will match it and they will just be like so obsessed with you does that sound cocky? No because your friends should be obsessed with you because guess what I'm obsessed with my friends and I hope that my friends think about me the way that I think about them because I'm obsessed, any of these gals I'm obsessed they are hilarious and I hope they are obsessed with me as well another thing I learned was that two things can be true at once you don't ever have to feel like you are like being proved wrong or proving someone wrong because two things can be true at the same time two people can have different experiences within the same scenario and I just think that I don't know I think I've talked about this before in my Friendship Breakups episode like forever go if you're an OG tyrant it was one of my first episodes but like not everyone there doesn't have to be a right person or a wrong person in every scenario sometimes you're both wrong sometimes you're both right and that's okay my next thing is if you can't be proud of other people and praise others for their success how do you expect people to be proud of you and to praise you for your success it's so easy to get jealous and envious about other people succeeding or their accomplishments because maybe like that was something you wanted or you feel like you're getting left behind yada yada yada but we really just have to be so we want we have to be what am I trying to say? you have to praise people and be proud for people as you would want them to be for you so say for instance this is just a hypothetical like I could be upset or anxious or jealous that Tesla owns a house and I'm renting a studio apartment like I could be that would be a thing that would be easy to get worked up over but what kind of friend would I be or what kind of person would I be to not be so proud of her for this huge accomplishment and to praise her for this accomplishment and to just like build her up and like be so pumped about this because I would want her to feel that way when eventually it's my time to buy a house or even not to match her there that energy when something happens to me like how can I expect my friends to listen to my podcast and to post about me on their stories and you know share links to the podcast whatever if I'm not sharing links about their things that are that they're succeeding in or their projects or their work or whatever like we really just have to match the energy or give the energy that we want to receive and I don't know about you but I'm trying to receive a lot of love and a lot of praise and a lot of proudness okay so I need to be better at showing that and I think I do show that with my friends but I definitely could do it more and I could definitely be better and I've definitely caught myself slipping up at multiple things and you know being jealous and anxious about certain things that happen to my friends you know if they get a promotion or if I know how much they make or you know they're going on a trip to Italy or this or if you had it out like it's so easy to get like jealous and insecure but you just have to be so happy for them because at the end of the day you love that person so much they're your friend and you'd want them to be happy for you my next thing is that I'm in my camper girl era as we know as we know which I'm not really because I haven't gone camping since camp rat aquachella but even that aside I just think that spending time outdoors is so healing we are humans we are animals like we used to be outdoors all the time like we didn't used to have houses you know thousands of years ago we lived in fucking huts or something but you know you're always outside you're working outside you're farming outside and you know with evolution and society we obviously just go outside way less and not even outside it's like I'm not talking like running errands I'm talking like going laying in a park in the grass going the beach like go camping go outside in nature like we need to just like not even as cheesy as like to like ground yourself and whatever like I do believe in all that but I know a lot of people think that's like bullshit and whatever but just to give you a sense of like a reality check to think that like you know when you go out and you see just like a lot of mountains in these fields and animals and not no building as far as I can see it really just like centers you to be like okay breathe whatever stressing you out it's not that big of a deal I really do just feel like so healed after I spend time outside even if it is just like a beach day or like going on a walk or going to the park or whatever like that truly does just make me feel happy and centered and it just like I can be so stressed and worked up over something and going to walk and all of a sudden I'm like okay I have a game plan I know I can handle this and it's not that big video everything's gonna be okay my next thing is a clean house is a clean mind and a clean mind is just room for creativity and business ideas and abundance and mental health and I really do think that we should treat our homes like I guess I don't know what to compare it to because some people I was gonna say like treat our homes like you treat your body but a lot of people treat their body like shit like me like I'm taking shots Friday through Sunday so I don't want to treat my home like I'm treating my body my liver okay but no I just think like your home is such a sacred place and you do spend so much time in it's where you wake up it's where you go to sleep and so it's like literally like you wake up from the slumber and the first thing that you're gonna see is a pile of clothes or dirty clothes or dirty dishes and I really think that we all need to prioritize having a clean house because if your house is always cleaning you're always on top of it free from clutter whatever your mind is gonna be cluttered and you're subconsciously not gonna be like worried about doing chores or you know cleaning up and that just leaves so much room in your brain to be creative and to work and I don't know that that is just something that I feel like I think I've talked about it I think I maybe talked about it on JC and Chelsea's podcast like I always make sure I clean my house on Fridays so that I can like enjoy my weekend and not just have that looming over my head because then I can just go and enjoy and have fun but I need to be taking that broader and your house just needs to always be clean free from clutter because then you can just be creative focus on work focus on yourself and just not have this like looming in the back of your mind my next thing I learned is that dating should not be scary why are we giving someone else so much credit and so much power over our life like we when you're newly dating someone or you're going on dates or you're dating around like you have full control you have full control all the cards are in your hand the ball is in your court like I'm sorry until I'm looking for a ring on my finger the ball is in your court you can do whatever you want like I feel that we just put so much pressure on even going on a first hand don't get me wrong this is all talk no action this is something I learned and recently and I'm trying to you know embrace it going into 27 is that like if you're you know in your 20s 30s whatever date around who cares like it's almost like it goes along with the nothing changes nothing changes like how do you expect to be in a relationship if you're not going on dates or if you're not responding to people in the DMs or you know being open to these new opportunities are these new people that are making passes at you I've been so close off for so long and I think finally I'm just like I'll go on the date and I feel like I never regret going on the date like like I always like sus and out beforehand you know I'm not going on dates are like complete strangers but you just never regret it even if it doesn't grow in it anything every person that you meet or come across in your life is going to add value to something because you're going to learn something about yourself or about them or about business or you're going to meet someone else through them like every person that you come across in your life like has a story to tell and to add to your story so don't be scared just go on the date say yes ask the person out like the guys Instagram stories I don't know we're being more forward this year because guess what 27 I don't know maybe I'll have a ring on my finger by the end of the year you never know you never know my next thing is don't let shiny new things or new friendships blind you from your old things or your old friendships for the friendship brow I think meeting new friends is so fun and like you should always be meeting new friends and expanding your group and whatever but I think it's easy to like be so obsessed with this new friendship of someone that then these friendships that you've really laid the ground before that you've been friends for 10 years plus or whatever it may be or that you have a really solid foundation with and they've really been your rock it's kind of easy to push them to the side because you've got this new shiny toy and this new thing and it's exciting to go out with this person whatever but that could be really damaging to your to your core friendship and I think it's this kind of goes against what I was saying earlier about other your friends should have other friends but it's not that it's not that I'm saying don't have that I just don't want you to or you to I'm talking to myself like I've just learned that I need to always prioritize my friendships that have like really stood the test of time and that have really proven like loyalty and success and love to me and yeah I don't know and then when it comes to stuff it's like don't let these new shiny things that you get fill your head that you aren't still appreciative of all these other things that you've worked really hard for whether that be like working equipment camera equipment clothing purses furniture cars I don't know anything like just make sure you're appreciative and you're utilizing all of your stuff and not just being like so obsessed with these like shiny new things either that you have or that you don't have this one's kind of broad but my next one is no one cares about you no one cares about you don't care about me no one cares about you don't care about them post the photo where the freaking outfit eat the damn pasta no one cares no one cares obviously if you have goals and dreams and whatever follow on and you do have people that care about you in a sense but at the end of the day we work ourselves up so much and I work myself up so much about like what people think about me and what people are going to say about my Instagram feed or this post or my outfit or my hair cut or whatever who cares no one no one actually cares people might judge you quickly and they might you know not like your photo or they might have different tastes than you but it's at the end of the day they are not thinking about you when you go to bed because they don't care they care about themselves everyone at the end of the day cares about themselves no one cares as some people care if they're losers whatever maybe I should rephrase it no one cares as much as you do and so just take a breath take a breath and do whatever you want my next one you guys have heard probably throughout the last year but car shit is the most annoying thing that can happen to a person the most unexpected thing that can happen to a person and so I've really just learned that we need to say on top of shit we need to not text and drive definitely not drink a drive we need to keep on top of our coolant levels or oil changes or everything take care of your car they're expensive it's a lot more expensive to fix once things go wrong so just do it right in the first place and then you don't have these unexpected like car breaking down this flat tire the love just do it right the first time take care of your stuff causes a freaking expensive when you buy it it's like take care of that we take care of our purses and our shoes and whatever but then we treat our cars like a pilot junk in a junk yard meanwhile it's for most of us it's the most expensive thing we've ever paid for so just take care of your car and that is something I really have to learn this year because Rita really put me through the ring this year okay my next takeaway or thing I learned from 26 is really the power of podcasts and I mean this not like with my own podcast that obviously but I already gave that whole spiel but I have just loved this year I fully dove into listening to other podcasts as we heard at the beginning of this episode I don't really listen to anything before I started but I as we all know I got rid of my TV I no longer have a TV in my house and don't get me wrong I still watch TV on my laptop a lot of times but for the most part like all day during the day if I'm just like sitting working emailing shooting like cleaning my house I'm listening to podcasts for the most of the time now and they are just so powerful no matter like you can get something powerful you if you want you can get something religious you can get something scary you can get something entertain you can pop culture you can get a book you can get a story you can get humor new as well like anything you want and I just think podcasting is just going to take off so much more that it already has and we're just going to see a whole new outlet of media just grow and soar into like a billion billion billion dollar industry and I'm here for I love it I think it's so it's such a beautiful industry and I'm happy that I can be a part of it and that you guys allow me to be a part of it but yeah I don't know that feels like a dumb thing to say but I just feel like I listen to so many podcasts now that I either like really learn stuff from I'm entertained by I get inspired by and it doesn't feel like I'm like rotting my brain as much as like just watching TV all day while I work you know so I'm my brain is thinking me from learning that this year my next thing is take the picture take the picture take a ton of photos take all the photos you never regret taking photos and I mean I I regret taking a lot of photos so let me take that back I've never regretted taking a photo with my friend or at a memory or in a location like there have been photos that I've tried to take like for ads or for work or whatever when I'm like okay that ended up looking like shit and I don't look cute but I I have regretted not taking photos like I feel a sense it's my job to take photos and be in front of the camera all the time or be behind the camera I feel that these last few years I never take photos I never take photos with my friends and with Coco and with you know just whenever I'm out exploring or like at the bars or anything like you should be documenting every time you hang out with your friends you should be taking yourself with your friend every time you hang out sorry there I said it and I really just want to make it more of a goal going into 27 to take more photos especially with my friends and that's just really something I learned this year because I have nothing to show I have nothing to show we should be using photography to document our lives not just to feed our egos and to take selfies when we feel like we look cute no when I have children I want to look back and be able to pull up photo albums and show them oh my gosh this is that time that I went on a catamaran for my birthday this is that time that Jose and I went to Abu Dhabi this is that time that oh my gosh we got so drunk at the bars and we had to walk home and so and so fell into a bush like those are the stories I'm going to be telling so far all they're going to be seeing is thought he thought grandpa in a speedo beat to the gods they're not going to be getting no memories they're going to be looking down selfie lane okay and I want to go down memory lane so take the photos document your friends you're never going to regret it honestly my next takeaway from being 26 is being well groomed being what what how am I trying to say this making sure you like your haircut being well groomed you know wax in the back putting a self-tanner on just taking care of yourself and taking care of your image is not narcissistic it is not narcissistic it is literally mental health and you should treat it as such and you should put importance into your image and how not how you're being perceived from others but how you want others to perceive you that is a very healthy natural thing to do and I've talked about this on the what we said podcast as well but literally in nature like peacocks for example have these gorgeous bright feathers that they put to attract the opposite sex teammate and they do this dance and a lot of birds have different you know call out sir lizards have different stripes or they changed colors when it's mating season blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah walk we see this in the animal kingdom all over Animals trying to impress other people and trying to, you know, be considered attractive and I think Putting so much emphasis on your image is like so Put down in today's society and it's viewed as like narcissistic But I think to a certain level like being obsessed with your image and being being happy with how you look and being a little bit narcissistic And making sure that you are putting care and time into how you are presenting yourself is natural And it is mental health. I don't know. Maybe that sounds dumb, but that's just me Okay, my 26th thing that I learned during my 26th year is Something that so many people say you do not have to have it all figured out I I do want to have everything figured out I want to know who I'm gonna get married. I want to know when I'm gonna get married I want to know if I'm when I'm gonna have children I want to know where I'm gonna move. I want to know when I'm gonna buy my first house all this stuff I want to have it figured out, but that is not normal and you shouldn't have it all figured out And it's okay that we don't have it all figured out Because even if I Bought the house say I figured that out. Okay, now when am I gonna get married when I get married When are you gonna have kids? You're always gonna have something. You're never gonna have it all figured out And you're constantly gonna be chasing this desire to have it figured out. So you've got to just let that go And I really am just going into 27 So excited and so determined for this next chapter of my life this next quarter of my life to just be so amazing And to reach just filled with so much love and growth and excitement and that's all I need I just need the excitement and the hope and the manifestation that that is gonna be true But I don't need to know anything else about this next chapter. Guess what? I don't know what I'm gonna be doing for work for the next 10 years This podcast could be a freaking flop Influencers could get kicked to the curb Instagram see awesome away from we Chacho Photography See later events photographer like I don't know what I'm gonna be doing next And that's okay. I don't know where I'm gonna be living next and my moving awareness How am I staying in WeHo? Am I moving to New York? Am I moving to Paris? I don't know You never know like you are never gonna have it all figured out and I don't want to have it all figured out Because that is just too stressful because then what's that figure that out then I'm gonna have to We're fine take a deep breath and I'm saying that to you and I'm saying that to me Anyways, sorry if that was just a long ass list of shit that you did not want to hear or need to hear but I just wanted to document 26 things that I took away from 26 so that I learned from 26 a little you know hopeful things for 27 I can't wait for my birthday weekend. I'm so excited to go on the boat. I can't wait to tell you guys all about it Next week's episode is gonna be at 27 dreams and goals that I have for my 27th year So make sure you tune into that if you're watching this on YouTube But give this video a thumbs up. Don't forget to subscribe if you're listening as a podcast Don't forget to give me a rating and review. Please give me five stars Take out the time type out a nice little something something. It helps me a ton. I love reading your guys's reviews If you want to rate this terribly go on and um don't Don't take the time to do that. Please no. I love you guys so much um Sorry this episode was late again. Sorry. There was no episode on Wednesday I've got a lot of things coming up that are gonna be really exciting and I can't wait to share with you guys a lot of them Have to do with the podcast. I know I always tease that and I always say that but it's true And I can't wait to show you. Hope you have an amazing weekend Wow, and don't forget to watch me a happy birthday on Tuesday Thanks for listening and stay tuned for next week You