460. How to Be a Change Agent - Tania Bhattacharyya, Tara Abrahams, Alex Aide, and Alia Whitney-Johnson
I think anyone working in non-profit, NGO, you know,
civil service, et cetera, should call themselves change agents
and have that mindset.
It's having that mindset, whether you call yourself a change agent
or not going out into the world every day
and saying, how can I add good to the world
rather than add to its problems?
That's crucial when it comes to creating impactful programs.
Hey, I'm John.
And I'm Becky.
And this is the We Are For Good podcast.
Non-profits are faced with more challenges
to accomplish their missions and the growing pressure
to do more, raise more, and be more for the causes
that improve our world.
We're here to learn with you from some
of the best in the industry, bringing
the most innovative ideas, inspirational stories,
all to create an impact uprising.
So welcome to the Good Community.
We're non-profit professionals, philanthropists, world
changers, and rabbit fans who are striving
to bring a little more goodness into the world.
So let's get started.
Becky, what's happening?
Hey, John, do you just want to pinch yourself
that we got to have this conversation
with these human beings?
I do.
I'm just so thankful that it was recorded.
I remember sitting, listening to this panel
and just thinking, my goodness, there is so much here
that when unleashed, literally will change the world.
Like, these are the thoughts, these are the people
that are going to power true world changing.
If you track with We Are For Good,
we put together a trend series at the beginning
of each season, and one of our trends this year
was really stepping into your power
to become a change agent.
And we really wanted to augment that trend
by having some larger conversations around what does that mean?
And how can we step into our power?
Even if we are a one person shop, you know,
at a tiny nonprofit, up to just another feeling
like another cog in the machine
and a major grassroots organization.
And so we curated this incredibly powerful panel
of individuals that we have seen
that are really embracing being a change agent
and evolving the world by using their voice, their story,
their lived experience, and lifting their ideas
as an important part of that story.
So here's the incredible human.
You'll hear on this recording, Tanya Bhattacharya.
She's our dear friend and the founder of Lumos Marketing,
Tara Abrahams.
She's the head of impact over at the Meteor
and the board chair for she's the first Alex A,
director of programs and impact over at
Born This Way Foundation.
One of our favorite orgs out there
in Alia Whitney Johnson.
She's the COO at Lala,
which is the Latin American Leadership Academy.
She's also the co-founder and board member
of Freedom Forward and Emerge Global.
These are powerhouse people with huge hearts
and this conversation is so powerful.
So I think I want to start a little bit with
how do we become a change agent?
And the reason we started this conversation
and we wanted to set up this panel is because
we have heard from so many in our community that say,
I want to do more.
I want to do more than my day-to-day work.
I am actually looking and seeing the opportunities
that exist within our organizations
to get more people involved.
I'm seeing the harm that's perpetuated by not speaking up.
And y'all, this is just a moment.
It is a special moment in time
where never before have we had the level of power
of seeing what our missions can produce,
how we can bring facts and truth to bear
to unite more people around incredible causes.
So we want your voice in this.
If you're someone who's a little trepidacious
about being vulnerable, sharing your story,
we're hope we're gonna give you just a little bit
of armor today because these four people
are gonna be your hype squad, of course, with John and I.
But we really want to talk about
how do you get activated?
And Tanya, I want to start with you a little bit.
And we had talked in an earlier session about,
we can't just look at the iceberg as what's on the top
because what is really building underneath
is the potential of what could be unleashed.
So talk about some of those things under the iceberg
that people may not see from the outside,
but they're so necessary to becoming
a really powerful thought leader and a change agent.
You have done this beautifully,
walk us through the beginnings of that.
Yeah, I love this concept of the iceberg, right?
Because so often, like what we see
when we look at beloved change agents like the Obama's,
like Greta Thunberg, like Lady Gaga, right?
We see certain things visibly from the outside,
like awards being invited to sit on prestigious panels
and attend world-class events.
But there's so many things that are happening
behind the scenes under the tip of that iceberg, right?
And so just a very non-azosist list, like a short list,
I would say would include like the slow and tender process
of dismantling our own systematically limited beliefs, right?
Like imposter thoughts, like people pleasing, like perfectionism.
What's happening behind the scenes
is those brave, thoughtful conversations
with the people who don't agree with what you have to say, right?
Community organizing strategy
and determining who we need to link arms with
to have the deepest possible impact
because we are so much stronger together, right?
Have it's like self-care, like community care,
which is usually so invisible to the rest of the world,
is really key in this work of changemaking.
And the last thing that I would say,
and again, this is not the full list,
there's so many things under the iceberg,
but something that's been really impactful for me,
is building my own personal board of directors,
and I called this my campfire circle,
and this came up really heavily when I was a non-profit ED,
and I made a public post, a LinkedIn post,
in support of a women's reproductive healthcare organization.
And I was surprised to see some negative comments
and engagement from existing donors of our organization,
especially since we were also a maternal healthcare organization.
And so in that moment, I was kind of at a loss.
I knew I did the right thing for saying what I believed in, right?
But I was kind of at a loss, right?
It was a sticky situation.
So I reached out to a wide variety of mentors and colleagues,
all the different perspectives, politics, experiences,
who I knew would share their best wisdom with me.
And that gave me that soft pad to land on,
and decide on a pathway forward.
So that's just a supportive board of directors,
a personal board of directors,
there's just one of the things under the iceberg
that just goes hand in hand with change-making work.
So how does that land with you, Becky?
I'll pass it back to you.
That lands like a soft warm blanket,
or a nice mom hug?
That's exactly how it is.
I want the bonfire right here on this table,
and I love that imagery.
And Alex, I want to tap your brain,
because I mean, which I've done through born this way,
is you've activated thousands, tens of thousands of youth
to pour into this work.
I mean, not only just using their story,
but really using it to power more kindness in the world.
So will you talk about what's it look to get change agents
activated at a grassroots level?
Yeah, and first I have to thank you all
for the incredibly kind introduction.
I have to thank the entire Real For Good team having me here.
And I'm really honored to be on this panel with everyone here.
So thank you all.
I love this question.
Born this way, we're all about empowering young people
to be change agents in their communities.
We believe that young people have the power
to make a difference, to create a kinder, more compassionate
world.
And so from our end, we provide them
with the tools and the resources they need to take action.
And maybe even beyond that a little bit, right?
We celebrate that.
Young people very often and lately see things
they want to change in the world.
And society sometimes tells them, no,
like, that's not cool.
Can't do that.
And we actually take the opposite view.
We celebrate what they envision changing in the world.
And for Marin, right?
We add on top of that tools to help them take care of their mental
health and inspire kindness, whether that's
to be their certificate program that you
mentioned at the top, our D-Cyndry 365 platform that
invites people to pledge to an act of kindness every day
to help build that kinder, braver world that we all envision.
And we also work with partners and organizations
to create opportunities for young people
to find community together or get involved in causes that
really matter to them.
So by empowering and celebrating young people
that want to be change agents, we're not only just
creating a kinder world, right?
We're also helping them develop leadership skills that
will benefit them throughout their lives.
OK, that's so brilliant.
And this is why I got to give born this way, foundation,
just to shout out, because that ability to listen,
to be empathetic, that is just hard-wired into your culture,
you are truly building and empowering this next generation
of change agents and letting them know that their voice
matter, their lived experience matters.
You've all done this beautifully.
I love in the chat.
I've seen somebody that is already crediting,
born this way with connecting her to youth voices rising.
So I love how homogenous this is already becoming.
But I got to kick it to Tara because your board chair,
she's the first, you know, you have this really unique lens.
And I got to say Tara is just the board director
that everybody wants.
She gives all of the power back to her ED.
She asks for education and she is just so empowering
with the way that she steps with her volunteerism.
But I want you to talk about how can we look beyond the horizon
to make changes that will change the systems of tomorrow,
like talk about what you're seeing in your role.
Sure.
And thank you so much for having me such a pleasure
in an honor to be virtually with you.
I wish we could all have this party in real life.
So I think in an answer to your question about systems,
I was thinking about this idea of just listening to be honest.
For me, it really does start with listening.
And in the case of she's the first,
which, as you mentioned at the top, Becky,
it's about really making sure that we are empowering girls
to be educated, respected, and heard,
and live the life that they want to live.
Girls should be at the center and are at the center
of everything that we do as she's the first.
And we are really led by them as the experts of their own lives.
They are the ones who can most effectively tell us
what they need, what they dream of,
and what they want to see in the world.
One of the things that we did, I guess almost five years ago,
was girl's source, as distinct from crowd source,
a global girl's Bill of Rights,
where we talked to hundreds of girls around the world
and gave them the prompt of what would you put
in a Bill of Rights and a sort of document
memorializing what you believe your fundamental human rights are,
whether that's freedom to go to school,
freedom to be free from cultural bias,
freedom just to walk down the street without being harassed,
assaulted, or violated.
I mean, these are just kind of fundamental things
that girls told us they want it, they need it.
Another thing that we love to do,
and she's the first, is really position the girls
literally as the experts at conferences
and high level events, as distinct from, let's say,
the amazing right policy makers or global leaders
that are working on this issue at the grass tops.
But for us, we kind of even play a little trick on the audience,
saying, come to this panel, come to this session,
where you're going to hear from experts
with decades of experience in food insecurity,
the caregiving economy, girls' education,
public health, water.
And then when the panel starts,
outwalk four adolescent girls, right,
from Sierra Leone, from Uganda, from Nepal,
from Guatemala, because they are truly the experts
and what it takes to change systems,
we've heard a lot of the past very challenging few years
that these systems are not broken, actually, right?
They're working exactly as they were designed to work,
but it's because they weren't designed by us.
So they weren't built for us.
And so for me, when I think about changing systems,
it's really about turning things over
to the people who are closest to what it means
when those systems aren't designed and built for us.
And we see that in our work at the media or as well, right?
The media is all about basically amplifying
the voices that are out there,
but can't get sometimes the traction
in the very traditional media landscape.
They can't break through some of the algorithms.
Our job at the media is to make sure
that women, girls, gender non-conforming people,
the LGBTQ plus community, the indigenous voices,
people with disabilities, that they have as much access
to tell their stories and to change culture
and to change systems as anyone else out there.
And I just know from spending time, I agree.
From spending time with Alia,
like this is so much part of your story.
I think when I hear listening, I think of your story.
And so I just want to give you the floor.
I don't want to go to the next question
because I think you have so much insight around
just how listening shaped your experience
and how that kind of created emerge.
Sure, I mean, as I'm listening to Tara,
I'm thinking we should have a panel
of she's the first young women here today
talking about who can teach it, right?
Because they are the people who are making change
in the communities, right?
They are the people who are closest to the problems
and how do we amplify those voices?
But I just, I so appreciate you lifting up the power
of listening.
I think so often when we come into these spaces
where we're asked to provide wisdom or expertise
about talking, and actually I think one of the things
that's been most important to me on my journey
is just taking a step back and listening
to every single young person that I've had the honor
of working with.
I've worked for about 17 years with young women
who've been through unbelievable challenges,
rape, trauma, trafficking,
but also have these incredible dreams for their communities
and are fighting for their sisters and their families
and making the world better.
And how do I leverage my position
to really understand the change they're trying to make
and amplify it, right?
And really do my job to listen
because they have the answers.
So thank you, Tara.
I want to talk about and sort of move into chapter two
of like, how do we foster the right cultures
for these right systems level changes?
And I want to go to you all year first.
Like, how does collaboration and coalition building
allow you to go further with your impact messages?
I know you've seen this play out over an emerge
probably also to it, la, la, la, like,
take us through that and what you've discovered.
Sure, thanks Becky.
I'm sure for everybody who's here today,
the issues that we're working on don't exist in a vacuum,
right?
If we're trying to change something,
we can go further together.
It's impacted by systems, by different actors,
by policy, by all sorts of different forces, right?
And it really takes all of us coming together
to make a big dent in these issues.
And so I want to give you a concrete example
about 10 years ago.
I moved from Sri Lanka where I was working on an emerge
to San Francisco back to the United States
where I was from.
And I discovered that San Francisco was a hub
of child sex trafficking in the United States.
And not only that, but around 70%,
there's not great data, but around 70% of kids
who are in the sex trade in San Francisco
grew up in our child welfare system.
So these were kids who are state in our city
were responsible for taking care of.
I left my job as a management consultant
and decided I wanted to do something
about preventing exploitation.
And what I learned as I talked to young people on the street
was that not only had been there been this pipeline
from our child welfare system into exploitation,
but once young people were exploited,
they were actually not only placed back into child welfare,
but disproportionately placed into institutional care
instead of placed into family-based care.
This meant that they went into large group settings,
often far away from their communities,
where the message they were receiving is you're unlovable.
You are far away from people who care about you.
And they were basically being primed to be re-exploited.
And so when I looked at this full system,
one of the biggest places we needed to make a dent
was changing the way foster care was structured.
I had two people in my organization.
Foster care is a giant system.
There's policy, there's money, there's state actors,
I'm coming in from Sri Lanka, I don't know how any of this works.
And at the time I was not even 30, right?
So I'm like, holy moly, and I'm not a lawyer,
what am I gonna do about this?
And so this is where the power of collaboration
and collective action comes in, right?
We started doing convenings.
We brought young people in, we brought folks,
kids who were in the Underground Street economy in,
we brought people who had been caregivers
in the foster care system in.
We brought frontline service providers in,
we brought policy makers in,
we said, what should this system look like?
Let's reimagine it.
And then once we had a plan,
and we kind of looked at what worked
and didn't work across the US and we finessed it
for San Francisco, we went to the state.
And we said, none of us can do this alone.
We wanna do it together.
And guess what, we got funded.
We're the only group in California that got funded.
Boom.
And that is the power of collective action.
There is no way any of us could have done that alone.
But that became the demonstration project
to say, how do we transform foster care
for this group of kids and test it
and pilot it and take what works
and change policy for an entire state.
And it was only possible because we all came together.
I mean, I'm thinking of,
I'm gonna quote Tanya, I bought a chariot,
but she's on the call, so she's quote herself.
But I think of just like moving like a pack of starlings,
you know, like that, that are just in movement
with each other.
Like the power of the collective is so much stronger.
And it seems like that's like just the balm
to all of our missions as we get people around it.
And I want to kick it to you, Tara.
I mean, with the media or with,
she's the first, talk to us about how we can really look
beyond the horizon to make decisions
that will change these systems.
What I think about is looking to the people around me
who are doing that, in fact.
And, you know, thinking about what it is that they are seeing,
when I write around the time that I first started
with the media or a couple of years ago,
a mentor of mine, back to girl rising days,
this global campaign focused on girls' education
that actually the film came out about 10 years ago.
Just this year, International Women's Day.
But one of my mentors said something that really stuck with me,
which is this idea of artists see round corners, right?
So, artists, activists, journalists
who are really looking into deeply embedded injustices
in our systems, people like Alia Tanya, Alex, all of you,
they can see round corners to help us look ahead
to, frankly, the thing that we may not be paying attention to
that we need to be, even as we're embedded
in the daily work of the issues that we're focused on, right?
So, we know that there's an incredibly powerful
and volatile, I might say, conversation happening right now
in our country about reproductive rights
and reproductive justice.
And the people that we listened to at the media
or, for example, as all of this was starting to come to a head,
right, let's say a year ago, two years ago,
where the people who were saying to us,
you know what, you can't just pay attention
to reproductive rights, reproductive justice.
There's also something coming for the rights of trans people
in our country, and these things are connected.
You can't detach them, and you can't separate them,
and unfortunately, we can't just work on one in isolation.
We need to actually come together and work on all of it.
And that foresight to have a sense of what's coming
to me, those are the people that I look to,
because those are the people who are kind of standing
on the edge, right, they're meeting the horizon.
I'm kind of back a little bit.
I'm in the daily grind of what I'm doing,
but these are the folks who are really,
as we like to say, right, on the front lines,
and are deeply embedded in the work,
and so can see where this is going,
and a 10-chest moves down the board.
And to me, that's the most critical thing.
Again, it goes back to the listening comment,
but it is about finding those people around you.
Is it the young people, like the ones you talked to,
Alia, when you first got back to San Francisco to say,
what is your experience been?
What are the ways that you're experiencing this system
as broken, or is it going to those journalists
and understanding, what are the stories that you're chasing down?
And finding those people, I thought about this word
as I was preparing for the panel,
is it a seer, right, a sort of someone who has
a kind of sense of premonition,
but because they've looked at data, right?
I remember a key TED Talk, and I will just be honest,
I'm not a TED Talk person.
I'm a we are for good podcast person, of course,
but I'm not a true love you to that.
Well, I went to TED Women, and I heard a talk
by Dr. Catherine Wilkinson, who's the co-editor
and of course, incredible climate activist,
along with Dr. Ayanna Elizabeth Johnson,
she gave her TED Talk about climate justice.
I walked into that room, and I was thinking to myself,
I'm not a climate person.
I'm a girls education person, I'm a women's person.
And Dr. Wilkinson had me in tears,
because she was making all of those connections for me.
She was the seer.
She was the one who is seeing around the corner
to say, if you care about girls,
you better believe you better care about
what the planet is doing, and what we're doing
to the planet, rather, because what she said
was mother earth is dying.
And guess who are the ones who suffer disproportionately
in climate emergencies?
It's women and girls.
It's vulnerable people.
It's people who are living at the edges every single time.
So that's kind of how I think about that.
Horizon setting, right?
I'm just looking for the people who are standing right there
at the edge.
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I want to kick this to Alex because I think Alex,
you can just hit your wagon onto this beautifully
with the work that you all have done in your programs
over at Born This Way.
But I want to talk about like this mindset
of being a change agent because everybody we've met
at Born This Way has this mindset
of the responsibility they have,
not only within the organization,
but just in this lifetime.
And I want you to talk about how having that right mindset,
how it changes and impacts programs,
how it changes cultures.
And we want to know like how you're thinking
about systems level change in your work
and what can be drawn from it for our listeners.
Yeah, well, first of all,
I'm obsessed with this title change agent
because I've never called myself that.
But I think anyone working in nonprofit, NGO,
civil service, et cetera,
should call themselves change agents.
And have that mindset.
It's having that mindset,
whether you call yourself a change agent
or not going out into the world every day
and saying, how can I add good to the world
rather than add to its problems?
That's crucial when it comes to creating
impactful programs.
And it goes without saying to everyone on this call, right?
We've all seen it through our work,
but change really starts at the grassroots level.
And that means what we've been talking about
on this panel so far, which is listening.
Most of all, working with communities directly
to identify their unique needs, their challenges,
at a micro level across the board.
And then systems level change is critical
if we want to create real lasting impact.
And that's why we all need to really be thinking about
working with partners, working with advocates
at all levels, not just at the federal level
or at a global level.
We need to be thinking truly it from local grassroots
nonprofits all the way to the top to really advocate
for policy changes, highlight what people are saying
on the ground for the world to know and creating movements.
Not way we make our communities more just, more equitable.
And then by keeping that mindset
throughout of being that change agent,
we're able to really just create programs
and invest in initiatives that will have meaningful impact
on the world.
Oh my gosh.
I mean, it's so much synergy
and I feel like so much hope in this conversation
that we're talking about really heavy, hard things.
But it feels like it's possible in community.
It's possible as we kind of talk about this.
And I want to kick it to you, Ton.
Yeah, I mean, as we start to get to some application
of like, how can we really activate
on the things that we're talking about?
A big part of that is using our voice, using our story.
I'm seeing the thread here that I appreciate
of not exploiting those stories,
but doing it in a dignified way.
You have the superpower, Ton.
You know, this is when we always tap you.
Well, you have a superpower
of how you can connect with people through story,
specifically on LinkedIn, but in social in general,
what are you, how do you advise nonprofits
to use their storytelling
and to just activate an army of people around them through it?
Yeah, I mean, storytelling is definitely a superpower, right?
And it's not just a superpower,
it's a survival skill.
Humans don't have as many physical,
evolutionary adaptations as lions and tigers and bears, right?
We don't have like super big sharp teeth or claws,
but we have storytelling, right?
As a very specific way to escape predation,
to work together as a community,
to like innovate for systems level change.
Just like Starlings, right, flying in a murmuration.
And so before appeal letters and advocacy emails
and podcasts, like stories have always been
how we have created change.
And so just in terms of like a case study
for how organizations can lean into that superpower,
and I shared this on the podcast
when we are for good as well,
but it bears repeating,
because I think it's such a powerful case study.
If we look at the abortion ban in Ireland
being overturned in 2018.
And so what happened is thousands of people
with abortion experiences were encouraged
to share their personal stories as part of this larger
sort of like a large scale grassroots campaign.
And so groups partnered with the Minister of Health
and you know pledged to share their personal stories.
They created conversation cafes where people could come,
people kind of who were on the fence, right?
It could come and hear real stories.
There were badges that people could wear in their daily life
that said, talk to me about repeal.
You know, there was storytelling trainings
as part of this campaign, right?
Including messaging templates.
And as the vote got closer and closer,
they would match up undecided voters
with people willing to share their story, right?
And so at the end of the day,
stories is what really turned this issue around,
which was previously before, you know, 2018,
so stigmatized and unspoken about,
which so many of the issues we work on really are.
And to speak to what Tara was saying earlier,
like I'm sure that this work created even bigger picture
conversations about the other intersectional issues
related to reproductive justice, right?
And so I think there's a lot from that case study
that nonprofits can learn from
and incorporate into their own processes.
And that being said, right,
it is a deeply personal and intimate decision
to decide that you're ready to share your lived experiences.
But if you do decide that you are,
I want you to think about who out there needs to hear your story
because it will motivate them towards action, right?
On those round corners that you see.
And you're sharing your story for them, right?
It's an active service for the world that you're envisioning.
And so just to kind of the last thing I'll say
is this thing I say all the time,
is as nonprofit leaders,
we often hesitate to get into the limelight
because it's like all about the mission, right?
It's all about the organization.
But when you step into the limelight,
it always reflects like back onto your mission, right?
So storytelling is a superpower for sure.
Totally.
I mean, I feel like you just nailed it right there.
And I think making sure that the story is not one-sided.
I mean, here's just a couple of pro tips.
Tag some people into your pose.
People that you respect,
make the conversation bigger than just yourself.
Add those tags in there.
And I want to keep going on this act of dignified storytelling.
We talked about not exploiting the story,
making sure that we're walking ethically through our work.
And all of you, I feel like you have done that beautifully.
I mean, you are a founder that truly walked away
from the organization you founded
to give up your power and give it back
to your Sri Lankan girls,
which is just one of the most aspirational things
I think we've heard yet.
So I want you to talk about the power of listening
and ethical storytelling and just understanding
the importance of the weight of your words
and how long they can stick around on the internet
and how we really want to champion
representing a population of people
for whom we speak in the most dignified way.
Talk about what you've learned in that
and how people can apply it.
Thanks, Becky.
And John, I have to say,
I don't know how you're keeping up with the chat.
Well, facilitation is remarkable.
Super man, super man.
So first, let me just say, yes,
I'm a two-time founder and I did,
I walked away actually from both of my organizations
as a gift of love.
And the first was an organization I started in Sri Lanka
for girls who had survived rape.
And these young women are extraordinary
and they have such big plans and dreams for their country.
And I started this organization when I was 19
and I was working with teenagers
and they used to, I used to tell them,
like, look at what we've accomplished together.
You can do this too and they would tell me
I could do it because I was white
and because of my American passport.
And I felt it was really important for them
to see themselves in the position of power.
And so I just wanted to say that.
We'll get a difficult story telling
but you talked about walking away.
And I think actually not only do words matter
but like these actions of like who represents
and who is the leader matters
when people are witnessing change.
I think it mattered a lot to what is possible.
And there are times when it's my time to step in
and there's times when it's my time to step to the side.
And like how do I know when those moments are there?
But because we were dealing with issues
that are highly stigmatized,
ethical storytelling is everything.
And I'm a big believer that our words matter,
our images matter.
They help create the realities.
We are manifesting in the world.
And as a sector, we have an obligation
to not only shine a light on the darkest places
that we're trying to change
but also to shine an even brighter light
in the reality that can be, right?
Like the reality we are trying to build
and to see people as full people.
So the young women I've worked with,
yes, they've been through horrible things
but they're also, they're children, they're teenagers.
Some of them are mothers or sisters.
They like to dance and play and they're silly and naughty
and some are shy and some are boisterous
and some want to be teachers and doctors and lawyers
and one wants to be the president
and they've gone on to start businesses and go to college
and that is beautiful.
And that is what we're working for.
I'm not working for their darkest moments.
I'm working for who they are, right?
And we have an obligation and a responsibility to hold that.
And I wanted to extend this.
There was something in the chat earlier about lived experience
and I lived experience is so important.
Like we need all different kinds of wisdom
and all of our movements.
And I have hired hundreds of people in my career
and many of them have come into my space
because of things they have experienced.
And it is so valuable, it is so needed.
And one thing I would like to say is that
sometimes the first bio I get starts with what they've been through
and why they're there.
And I am all for owning your story and owning your power
and if you're ready to step into that and work with Tanya
and think about the change you want to make, go for it.
But if you think that I only hired you because of that,
you're wrong, right?
Like you are bigger than your darkest moment.
We all have to be, right?
Like we probably have people in this audience
who've been through divorce or cancer or rape
or all sorts of hard things, right?
And that is not the only thing that makes us who we are.
It is a really important thing, right?
But it is not the only thing.
And so once we put something on the internet,
even if we change it, it is always there
and I cannot tell you how many people I've worked with
who have shared their story that Gala's or a newspaper's
or in bios and then 10 years later, they've come to me
and they've been like, not with my organization
but with others, I feel used or exploited
and I don't want my children to think
this is the only part of me.
And so I just say that because while lived experience
is so important, we also have, it's not just ethics
as a responsibility to hold this with care
and to really not re-objectify or re-exploit
when we are trying to transform systems and realities
that exist around us.
And we have a big part to play in that in our sector as well.
And we have a big part to play
in how we educate our donors and our community.
And that's on us.
So I just want to leave us with that, right?
Like, it's important, but it's not the only thing, right?
Like, we're bigger than that.
I see Tara's comment that's getting the love
that their trauma is not who they are.
I mean, that's beautifully said.
And okay, I am like grieving
because the countdown clock is telling me
we have four minutes and you know how we round this out.
We have to have a one good thing moment
and you've given us so much.
Each of you, I want to thank you for your presence today
and your wisdom and sharing space.
Thank you for everybody in the chat.
But Alex, I'll start with you.
Share a one good thing you would leave us with
to kind of round out this conversation.
Yeah, kindness is free.
And it has real measurable impacts
on our collective mental health,
whether that's us performing an act of kindness,
the recipient of that kindness,
and even the witness of that kindness.
It has a real measurable impact on our mental health.
And in a world where nearly everything has a cost,
it's still free.
So I'll leave you with that.
The lawyer's telling us kindness is everything.
You are the ultimate disruptor, Alex.
Okay, Tanya, what about you?
What's your one good thing?
Oh my gosh.
Well, I think it's probably this quote
by our fairy godmother, Brunei Brown,
which sums a lot of this up.
And it's one day you'll tell the story of what you overcame
and it will become part of someone else's survival guide.
Love that quote.
So good.
Laura, what's on your mind?
Sure, I mean, it's come up so many times
throughout this amazing discussion,
but for me, the word that I want to leave everyone with
is interconnectedness.
Just quickly, I think some of you know
that I started a girls magazine,
print magazine called Kahani,
which means story in Hindi,
telling the stories of girls around the world.
I don't know if people know,
including Alex and Alia,
that both Lala and channel kindness
have had young people submit and contribute stories
to recent issues of Kahani.
It's just to say, look at the power
of what can happen when we come together
and recognizing that all of the issues
that we're working on individually
as part of our organizations
have deep and powerful connections to one another.
And so really be looking for that.
See those connections,
seek them out because our work
is going to be stronger if we do.
The world is so small.
You know, when you think about this work
and we need everybody pouring into that,
Alia, round us out and bring us home.
What's your one good thing?
I love that some of our young leaders have applied.
Thanks, Tara.
Mine is, and I shared this on a podcast episode with you,
but it's the theme of my year in a world
that's been so dark and heavy.
Don't forget to play.
There is such value in play
and it is so underrated as adults.
Play helps us be more creative.
It helps us be more innovative.
It helps us connect with each other in new ways
and use new parts of our brain.
It helps us level power dynamics
in ways that are extraordinary.
So bring play into your work.
What a beautiful way to round this out.
And I love that the link to Kahani got dropped.
Because I know you all are looking for stories
to all the time, Tara, of women that want to step
into their power.
Girls want to step into this
and have their story amplified.
So can we add one good thing?
Please do.
Here's my one good thing for you.
Do a 1% shift.
When you leave this session today,
I want you to write something down
that's going to make a little 1% shift
in the way that you are going to embrace being a change agent.
Do it at your comfort level.
Do it at the speed that feels good to you.
But let's make a shift.
Because I think you can feel the energy, the love,
the warmth, and the desperation
in needing these stories, needing this interconnectedness.
We need to know what's happening within your community.
We need to know what you see, what you're feeling,
what opportunities exist.
Because we are not defined by the harm.
We are defined by the opportunities that go on afterward.
Let's create those opportunities for others.
You have the power to do that with your lived experience,
with your heart.
You've got your hype squad.
Right here, all six of us, we are rooting for you.
Let's pull together.
Let's make this movement one that is all about change and empathy.
Thank you so much for joining us.
Thank you to our guests.
We are humbled by what you do.
And we're humbled by every one of you in the chat
for how you pour into missions.
So go find these incredible humans, follow them,
soak up their wisdom.
Thank you for joining us.
What an honor to have you here.
Appreciate you all.
Thanks for joining us today.
Thanks so much for being here.
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